Come A Little Closer (A Duff Mckagan Fan Fic)

Chapter 1

Seattle, Winter 1983

I was standing in the back of a seedy club, nervously looking around to see if anyone noticed the underaged kid in the room.

I stuck out like a goddamn sore thumb.

I mean I was seventeen, but underneath the makeup I could pass for about five years younger.

After busting my ass at school all day and pulling in a few hours at my crappy grocery store job, here I was, waiting for my best friend's band to come on.

Now don't get me wrong, Ten Minute Warning was a good band, but seeing as how I hung around with people who didn't have to worry about going to school or saving up for college, no one else did much except screw around and go to the part time jobs they held until their bands made it.

I always promised Duff that I'd show up at his shows, he had me wrapped around his finger, not that he noticed.

We had been friends for years. His older sister used to babysit me when my parents would go to work and she always had to drag Duff along. From what I understood, their mother worked long hours and Duff needed to be kept occupied and out of trouble. If any sort of mayhem could be found, Duff would find it, and he was always getting me involved in his crazy schemes.

I couldn't lie, I loved it. The adventures we had throughout the years led to the memories I would cherish the most. But no matter how much trouble he got in, Duff always got off easy. He had connections everywhere due to his huge family, and he also knew how to talk his way out of a jam.

Everybody who knew him loved him.

I told my parents I was going to a sleepover before I left the house, not that they gave a shit where I went anymore. Duff was only a couple years older, but as of lately my parents didn't approve of the shit he was into and hated the fact we were so close.

My dad would give me the same slurred speech every night.

"Liv, why do you need to tramp around with older men? What, does he make you feel special? He's only gonna use you for all you're worth and leave you to rot."

Funny how they would judge him despite the fact that they could barely function without a little pick me up.

My dad was an alcoholic, my mother loved pills.

I had always promised myself that I'd never get into any of that shit. I wanted to be better than my parents and actually contribute something positive to this world. I was going to be somebody.

Duff was always really supportive of that. He always told me that he'd never let me get off track because I was the one person who he could count on to support him after his rockstar dreams failed.

I knew they wouldn't, he was way to dedicated and talented to not make it.

This is why we go along so well, we understood and supported each other when no one else gave a shit.

This is why I loved him.

The lights flashed on on stage and the crowd began to get loud. The band was starting to get a real following and I was so proud of Duff. This is what he wanted to do with his life and he was actually making it happen.

They kicked ass as usual. I swayed my head along with the music and other people around me began moshing and banging their heads.

The entire band was in their element on stage and Duff was lost in his playing. As the show came to an end, I rushed to the back of the club where Duff and the rest of the band were coming off stage. I ran up to him and grabbed his arm.

"Fucking awesome job, Duffers!" I engulfed him in a hug even though he was covered in sweat.

"Thanks, Liv! Glad that you could be here, I always seem to play better with you in the crowd" He grinned cheekily.

"I'm at every show!"

"I know" he giggled like a child as he walked into the back room, he grabbed a beer and I followed suit.

The rest of the band, Paul, Steve, and Greg, as well as a few of our other friends, Kelly, Anne, Rosco, and Melissa were sitting throughout the room, beers in hand all laughing and talking.

Everyone was out of high school besides Rosco, Melissa, and I but they stopped giving a shit once we reached our senior year. Their band was really starting to gain notice and they had plans to record a demo soon.

Duff and I sat on one of the couches in the dingy room and everyone screwed around for a bit. We cracked jokes at each other's expense and talked about other upcoming bands.

The newspapers were all talking about something called 'the Seattle sound' but nobody really payed attention to the buzz. Apparently all of these bands were starting to get noticed by record labels and the music scene here in Seattle was going to blow up within the next few years. They called it 'heroin chic' or 'grunge' which was really fucking stupid because no one here even knew what that meant.

After awhile I looked over at Duff who had gone uncharacteristically quiet. He looked a bit bothered, like something was eating at him.

"What's going on in that head of yours?" I asked, curious as to why he looked so conflicted.

"I got something to tell everyone, but I don't really know how to say it" he said, looking a bit nervous.

"Fuck it." He muttered before whistling to get everyone's attention.

What the fuck is this all about.

"So I'll just skip the shit and get right to it, I've decided that I'm going to LA"

Did I just hear him correctly? I couldn't even process a response.

"When are you leaving?" One of his band members questioned.

"Two weeks or so. I'm gonna try and make it out there. "

"Jesus, Duff" I spat out. Duff had repeatedly told me that he wasn't leaving until I could come with him. What the fuck was going on!

He made eye contact with me as I donned the coldest face I could manage

He had always promised that he wouldn't leave me here alone and he caught me off guard with this shit.

Why didn't he talk to me about this? Who the fuck else was going to spend Friday nights with me, smoking and drinking in my basement?

Who else would pick me up when my parents decided to get strung out?

Who else was going to make all the bullshit in my life a bit more bearable?

While everyone congratulated him on finally getting out of here, I stood up and made my way outside for a smoke before the reality of what I had just been told had set in.

After about half of my cigarette burned down, I heard Kelly join me for a smoke. She knew how I felt about Duff, she claimed that anyone with half a brain could tell that there was something deeper then just friendship.

"I don't blame you for being pissed that he's leaving, but you can't really be shocked. You knew he's been itching to get out of here." Her voice was laced with sympathy.

"Just expected that he'd wait for me. He fucking promise that he'd wait and we'd go together."

"Livvy, you have to learn to stand alone. You can't rely on some 19 year old boy to wait for you. Duff cares about you and all but he's a dreamer and you can't spend your life chasing him around while he lives his rockstar dreams. You're smarter than anyone else I know and I'm sure that you'll be able to get out of here on your own accord."

I leaned my head on the other girl's shoulder, her wispy, acid green hair brushing my face while I tried to choke back tears.

I knew I could live without him.

It would hurt, but as long as I keep my wits sharp and stay focused, I'd be okay.