Melkor's Mistake

Chapter 8: Maedhros

A/N: Hi! Um...ok, so there are three obvious sections in this chapter (which mostly has to do with our good friend Maedhros...as the chapter title suggests). Just to clarify, the first part is when Maedhros is a baby (that's obvious), the second is when he would be about 9 or 10 in human years (Celegorm's 6 or 7), and the third is when he would be 17 or 18, I guess.

I know that I screwed up some names. I know that Maedhros wasn't called Maedhros when he was born. I sound like a sucky fanfic writer but... I don't care. When I'm done with this whole thing, I hope to go back and edit, possibly adding/changing names then. Sorry for my weirdness...

IMPORTANT NOTICE: Any Maedhros/Fingon romance is purely accidental. I prefer to think of them as just best, BEST friends, but it if you want to take it as slash...go ahead. I really don't care. Just know that it isn't intended to be that way and so there won't be anything romantic. Yeah.

Realy not my best chapter, but...have fun reading! Please comment/vote!

As I glance up to Feanor's eyes, blazing with joy, it only makes me sadder. Of course, we don't make eye contact; he isn't looking at me. He's looking at the little bundle in his arms, the bundle that's crying and gasping for air, getting used to the feeling of breathing, of being alive. He looks down, poking a fnger into the bundle, calming the baby's crying somewhat, and says softly, "My son. My precious son. You are the first, you know." Feanor looks up, his eyes becoming unfocused. "I wonder," he mutters to himself, "if you will take after Nerdanel or me." Glancing back at his son, he strokes his small head. "I can already see your hair is like your mother's, so fiery."

Taking a deep breath, I prepare to step out from behind the corner. It makes me feel odd to stalk Feanor the way I am. It's not right. I go to move, but it is almost as if my feet are glued to the ground.

I haven't had a proper conversation with my friend since the day of his wedding, and I really should talk to him now. Forcing myself to walk forward, I announce my presence. "Hello, Feanor."

He whips around, as if startled by the sound of my voice, and he clutches the bundle to him. I force a laugh. "Don't worry; I'm not going to take him." Though he lowers the child from his chest, Feanor still looks wary and tense.

"Luinil," he says, as if my name is new to him. "Why are you here? We haven't talked for years. What do you want?"

I move closer, my eyes flicking to the gorund. Taking in a deep breath, I tell myself, You need to do this. It's what you've been waiting to do. It must happen.

"Feanor," I begin, "I only want to express my regret for shutting you out. I am so sorry. Will you forgive me?" There is a moment of silence before he says softly, "Only if you tell me why. Why did you shut me out?"

"I..." I don't want to have to tell him, though part of me expected this. "I...didn't think you would give up on me so easily."

"Give up on you?" I glace up. His grey eyes, like the sky on a clouded day, seem to be filled with something between concern and confusion. "Luinil...I tried for over half my life. I would not call the giving up easily."

I laugh. "I understand. Everything is my fault. I am sorry. This won't happen again."

He nods sternly, and I copy him. There is a moment of awkward silence, broken only when I ask, "Where is Nerdanel?"

"Resting. Giving birth to a child must be hard work." There is a hint of humor in his voice, and I allow the ghost of a grin to touch my lips. I stare at the baby in his arms. The child's eyes are green like the grass and the trees, flecked with gold. They are reminiscent of Nerdanel's, like his hair, which reminds me of the firelight just as it's dying down to smoking embers.