ɪᴛ'ꜱ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏꜱ ʀᴀɪɴɪɴɢ ᴡʜᴇɴ ɪ'ᴍ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ. (ᴍᴇʟʟᴏ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ)

6

It's always raining when I'm with you

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You went to check your kitchen clock, "7:42" It had read. You went to get your night clothes and a towel. You needed a bath after today to help you relax, and think about what happened as well. You went to your room and opened a box with a T shirt, pajama bottoms, and your underwear. You opened another box with your toiletries, and a towel. You gathered your things and headed to the bathroom. It was so quiet, if you had dropped a pin right then and there, that would've been the loudest thing in the room. But you needed the silence. You needed to hear your thoughts. You set down your towel and clothes then turned on the facet, making sure the temperature was just right before putting the plug in. You undressed yourself, and got in the nice warm water. The bathroom wasn't as nice as the one back home, if you could even call that home now. You felt so bad, you hadn't even called, but you were more shocked at the fact that your mother didn't call. Not even once. You signed and sunk into the water even more, staring at the faucet. Drip drip drip.
"I still can't believe I'm doing this. I want this but...no. No buts. I want this and that's final. I want to please him, I want to work with him, I want to be with him. Ever since that day, ever since that interaction, I've been wanting more of his presence. He's the reason I'm doing this, and I won't turn back now. I refuse. I've gotten so far, I'd be a waste if I changed my mind now. I mean, I've already interfered with the mafia, If I back down now, then I'd be killed for sure. No one can get away from the mafia, even if that's what I wanted." You sat up and buried your face in your knees.
"Oh god..now I'm talking to myself about him out loud. What have I come to? What have I become? I'm only a blinking star in the night sky to him, something nice for only a split second. Why am I doing this?" You asked yourself.
The thing is that you already knew the answer.
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You woke up to your alarm clock blaring in your ears at 7:30 in the morning. You hit your alarm and pulled your sheets off your face. You needed to unpack a little before going, because who knew when you were going to get another chance to. You had walked to the kitchen, realizing that you forgot to go grocery shopping yesterday. "Goddamn it." You whispered to yourself. If I get ready now, then I'll have enough time to go shopping then unpack a little. Probably not as much as I was wanting, but enough. You walked to your room and got out your outfit for the day. You changed and did your daily routine. You grabbed your umbrella before going out because it was supposed to rain today. As you grabbed the knob of the door, you took a deep breath. You headed out of the apartment complex, walking to the grocery store. As you were walking, you noticed that it was misty. The weather was nice, so you kept your umbrella closed, but put your hood up. You glanced at all of the flowers blooming in someone's yard, making you smile slightly. There were all different colors. Pink, yellow, white and purple flowers. You caught attention to the crosswalk, waiting for a car to pass so you could cross. You glanced up at the sky while you were waiting. It was a cloudy day, but that didn't mean you couldn't enjoy it. You had crossed the road, arriving at the grocery store, its bright neon lights welcoming you inside. You only had about 5000 yen with you, so you had to use it sparingly, probably mostly on ramen noodle cups and instant dinners. They were cheap, affordable, and you could get a lot of them while still having some money left over. You walked over to the big slide door freezers, getting a few instant dinners putting them in your cart. You checked your watch. "9:02.." You had mumbled to yourself, not paying attention to the person in front of you.
"Hey!" a familiar voice echoing through your ears. You glanced up. It was Matt!
"Oh, hi!" You gave him a warm smile. "I was just getting groceries. What are you up to?"
"Same here. Mello ran out of chocolate. Again. So that's what I'm here for. Surprised he hasn't gotten diabetes at this point." He laughed, and you laughed with him. You guys started walking together, talking about random things as you both shopped. You headed to the check out with Matt, getting your bags. "Well, I better get going." You said, struggling with your groceries. Matt noticed this and offered you a ride. "Oh, sure. Thanks a lot." You put your bags in the back, getting in the front. The car started and you guys were off. You stared out the window peacefully until Matt broke the silence. "You know..Mello has been talking about you." You slightly blush, keeping your head turned towards the window so he won't notice. "H-he has?"
"Yeah. He said that he didn't know why he was thinking 'Stupid sappy things' when he was with you. I told him It might have been love but he brushed it off and denied it."
"I don't know what to say. This is all happening faster than I expected." You said, now looking at Matt. "What do you mean?"
"Promise you won't tell Mello..?" He nodded and then you took a deep breath. "Ever since that day, when me and him locked eyes, it awoke something inside me. An emotion I didn't even know I was capable of feeling."
"Love?" Matt stated, still looking at the road. "No..No, no something greater. It's hard to explain, but... I don't know. Silly isn't it?" You slightly laughed to yourself. "No, I don't think that's silly at all. Seems like you both like each other but are having a hard time with your emotions. I'll just let you two figure out the rest." You arrived at your apartment, and Matt helped carry up bags.
"Sorry it looks a mess..I haven't had time to unpack yet." You said, dropping grocery bags onto the kitchen counter. "Nah, it's fine." Matt said doing the same thing, then sitting on the recliner in the living room. The kitchen and living room were connected, it only seemed separated by the long kitchen counter. He got out his gameboy while you put away groceries, putting your Ramen in the cupboards and frozen dinners in the freezer. "Hey, I'm going to go unbox things in my room, if you need anything just let me know." You said smiling towards him. He looked up from his game, pausing it. "Do you need any help?"
"No, I'm fine, you've done enough already. Thanks anyway though." You walked into your room, looking at all of the boxes with your hands on your hips. You sighed. This is probably going to take me longer than I anticipated. The only reason you didn't want Matt helping you is because you had personal stuff that he shouldn't know about in some boxes, with papers and personal journals, containing thoughts and feelings you couldn't describe about Mello into words onto paper. You opened one of the boxes with your clothes in it and began to fold them, being very observant of the time. Once you finished and put them all in your dresser drawers, you bagan setting up your desk lamp and putting books in the drawers of the besk. You accidentally dropped one of your notebooks right side up, with pages open as Matt walked in. "Hey which cupboard is the Ra-" He stopped his sentence as you hastily picked up the jornal that said 'Diary' on the cover. Shit.
"Hey, what's that?" Matt said teasingly, as he took the Diary from your hands. "Nothing!" You shouted, trying to get the notebook from his hands. He dogged your quick movements and ran to the bathroom with it, locking himself inside. Ohgodohgodohgod. If he found out what I have written in there, he would tease me around Mello for sure, then Mello would get suspicious and who knows what would happen if he actually found out. "Matt! Open this door!" You shouted. But...Nothing. There was only silence from the other side of the door. It felt as if someone was jabbing at your heart as each second passed, your brain racing with thoughts and questions. After a long five minutes, the door opened. Your face grew hot as you looked away from the man that had just read your heart and soul.
"Wow, I knew you liked Mello, but damn. You're obsessed!" He threw the book to you, which you caught and held it tightly against your chest. "Am not!"
"You can try to deny it all you want, but I know the truth and nothings going to change my mind. Don't worry, your little secret won't slip out from me..yet." He said with a grin, grabbing his coat and gameboy from the recliner. "What do you mean "yet"? You said with a demanding tone, fear resting with you. "I said what I said, now I gotta go. See ya in a few hours." And with that, he left you there in a sense of panic. This cannot be fucking happing right now.
I might as well be as good as dead.
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