A Family of Flaws

Chapter Twelve; A Talk With A Friend

*Tony's POV*

Tony had been keeping to himself, locked away in his room, only talking to Rhodey, Pepper, and occasionally Happy. And they kept telling him how much the team wanted to see him and talk to him and just make sure he was okay again.

But that sounded like an impossible thing to do. Leave his room and face them? There was no way. Rhodey and Tony had talked and that was hard enough. And they had discovered something. Tony could not talk when his anxiety kicked in. Not the normal anxiety, but the kind he got when he worried about those he cared about. When that anxiety started forming, all vocalization was practically impossible beside a few muttered words.

Tony just needed time to calm down and let the embarrassment die down a little, then he would consider talking to them. Maybe he could just start by texting them and having small conversations there, possibly leaving his room, but talking was still out of the picture.

And Rhodey said that was fine. Tony didn't have to feel pressured into speaking to them. They had all agreed he could take as much time as he wanted, even if they were desperate to see him and hear him speak. That had relieved some of the building stress.

In the meantime, Rhodey decided to become Tony's personal therapist. They would talk and talk and talk until Tony felt completely dissected, but it was nice to hear Rhodey tell him that this wasn't a sign of being crazy or psychotic, he even told Tony that this showed how strong the team had grown with each other. But he also said that Tony needed a better way to handle it all. And talking had proven the best method.

  "Tony, please, listen to me." Rhodey's voice filtered through the haze that had surrounded Tony. They had been talking as they had been the past few days, but something had triggered another anxiety attack and now Tony could only hear static and Rhodey. That wasn't awful, no noise other than his best friend? That was okay. Except it wasn't. Because Rhodey sounded scared and panicked. "Hey, c'mon, just take in a deep breathe and stop thinking about all the bad stuff that could have happened. It didn't happen and everyone is okay. Please... just take some breathes with me, Tones."

  Tony stared at the ground, they were in the bathroom as they always were. The duo would sit on the floor in front of the mirror and lean on the cabinets together. And that is where they would always talk. But now Tony was just staring at the floor, and apparently he wasn't breathing. Though, he couldn't feel anything right now, the static that filled his ears had also taken over his other senses besides sight.

  But that didn't seem like a good thing. Tony could see small droplets of water falling to the ground, and they were coming from him. He was crying and he wasn't breathing. Rhodey was calling for him, worried. And Tony was just crying on the floor of the bathroom. It felt like college all over again, after a particularly bad hangover where he puked his guts out and started crying while Rhodey rubbed his back and tried to make him feel better. But back then, Tony could talk and he didn't have static surrounding him.

  No words could escape Tony's mouth. That ability had long since disappeared, gone the moment the anxiety attack started. Replaced, instead, by the annoying tears streaming down his face and falling to the tiled floor below him. Rhodey was still shouting out to him. Tony felt bad for not answering, it almost made him want to start breathing and stop crying and talk again, but he didn't feel that bad yet. So he let Rhodey try to help. He cried and let Rhodey shake him, call for him, and try to bring him back to reality.

  Tony thought he was in reality, but it seemed he had been transferred to his own world, one full of static, tiled bathroom flooring, and the voice of his best friend. If you took away the part where he was crying and not breathing, the world would have been very nice. Except he still wasn't breathing and it was starting to show, even with the static. And if it got through the static then it had to actually be bad.