A Diamond with Scars

Give into the Darkness

A few weeks passed by in a foggy blur and Mark remained in the ICU. He had become septic and his body went down quick. Luckily the hospital had one of the best sepsis teams in the state and were able to keep him alive. The first week and a half they had him on a respirator. Once he was finally awake, they were able to remove it and monitored him around the clock to be sure he was safe to breath on his own.

The day the aid came in to help him bath was a bit of a shock to him. In just those few short weeks, Mark had lost quite a bit of weight, making him feel weaker than before. Not only his body, but his mind. Mark couldn't help but give into the dark thoughts that had taken over. Wishing himself dead. What else was there to do except lay up in the bed and think. He wasn't much of a TV person before the accident, and didn't want to start. Never before in his life did he ever imagine being this low. For so long, he had never understood how people could ever get to that point until he was finally in it. He gave up. This was his rock bottom. It felt like no end in sight. He was broken; Mind, body and spirit. So much for thinking he would be a marathon runner like so many others after this.

Finally after another 2 weeks, Mark was moved to a rehab unit. His brothers came in to visit him once they got him moved. They wanted to encourage him to work hard to get out of the hospital, but were both horrifyingly shocked to see him a shell of his former self. His cheeks were sunken in, his eyes had dark bags under them, he had refused to shave, skin ashen. A permanent scowl marked his once handsome face. Just a few short weeks had done so much damage.

Evan looked at his brother, Phil, words not needed. Mark was asleep, thank God, because the look on their faces was full of shock and horror.

Phil pulled Evan to whisper to him, "What the fuck happened!? He looks like a Goddamn skeleton!" Phil was pissed, thinking that the hospital had mistreated his brother and were not taking care of him.

The two brothers began to vent to one another about the treatment of their brother. Thinking they were being quiet, but not so much. An older, heavy set nurse with frizzy silver hair, glasses, and a limp from a bad knee, came up to them. "He refuses to do anything." She said with concerned eyes and a huff. "We moved him here 3 days ago. He hardly eats...I offered to get him a shaving kit...Hell, one orderlie offered to bring him food from the restaurant down the street. Man just sits there staring off into space." Shaking her head she glanced into the room at him. "Word has it...when he arrived at the recovery unit after..." she trailed off, referring to his leg, "A woman came in and broke off their engagement...apparently the cunt called him half a man!" The old nurse got red in the face, obviously heated about the audacity of the bitch. Shaking her head she straightened herself, holding up a hand to excuse her outburst "The other nurses had unfortunately heard the whole ordeal...Then...that night, he had a seizure and went septic...recovered physically...for the most part." Her gaze softened to sadness, "But not his heart...none of the PTs can get him moving...He has given up." As if she needed to tell them, it was obvious.

Evan and Phil stared at her, unable to speak. Some relief washed over them to know the hospital was trying, but the concern remained that their brother had lost all his hope. The woman continued on. "I wish Anya were here...She picked a heck of a time to be off...I bet she would help him get in gear..." The nurse tapped her foot impatiently, "They won't let him stay here if he doesn't try." She warned. "Been here 25 years and never seen anything from someone so young...older folks, yes..."

Phil crossed his arms and raised a brow, "Who's Anya?" he questioned the nurse, glancing at her name tag that read Lisa.

"Only the best Physical therapist we have. That girl can get anyone and everyone on the track to living on their own." Lisa smiled proudly. "Studied under old Dr. Fillmore before he retired."

The two had no idea who she was talking about, but they also wished this mystery girl was around to get their brother in gear. Swallowing a lump in his throat, Evan turned and made his way in to see his younger brother.

As if he sensed their presence, Mark groaned and opened his eyes to see who was there, thinking it was one of the nurses coming in to assess him for the umtenth time that day. "Evan?" He questioned taking notice of the large figure standing in front of his bed with a slight scowl on his face. "Phil...what are you guys doing here?"

Phil ran a hand through his hair, "Mom was worried. Told us to come check in on ya." He could see the cloudiness cross his younger brother's eyes when the words came out. "What the Hell is going on Mark? You are just laying in this fucking bed wasting to nothing." Phil was the brother without a filter, he always spoke his mind. Tended to get himself into trouble from time to time with it, which was why he worked from home and avoided people most of the time.

Evan elbowed him in the stomach with a death glare to watch his mouth. Before he was able to retaliate, Mark spoke up.

"Fuck off." He growled. "What is the point anymore? Can't do shit now, my career is gone just like my Goddamn leg." Mark did spend a lot of time working IT for the police department, but he also spent a lot of time being active on the front. "My fiance left! Calling me half a fucking man. She is right. What kind of woman is going to want me now? Just up and left like I was just another business deal she didn't want part of because it wouldn't benefit her anymore." Everything bubbled up and exploded out of him, shocking both of his brothers. Mark was never one to explode like this, but when he did, he was a force to be reckoned with. The words continued to spill out of him, leaving Evan and Phil staring at him, allowing him to vent. "I can't run after Minnie anymore! I am not her strong big brother anymore!" Mark felt hot tears stinging his eyes. It had been years since he cried. He felt like he was no longer his sister's hero like this. Fuck Lori, she was dead to him. 

(I cannot imagine the pain and changes that comes with losing a limb...but I admire so many of them who still continue on and don't let it hold them back. Which is a huge reason I am writing this story. I have not seen many stories about amputees. I hope ya'll are enjoying the story thus far. And another thing: FUCK LORI, that cunt LOL I hated writing her character. What a cold hearted bitch!!)