California dreamer

Chapter 3

Elizabeth

Next day I woke up at about six o'clock in the morning, that wasn't characteristic of me. I was astonished where the girl who couldn't bear to get up at noon had disappeared. Luckily, yesterday evening I went to the nearest shop and bought everything I needed for breakfast – cookies and ingredients for hot chocolate.

In Russia I always drank tea or cacao in the morning because they were easy to cook. And cooking, especially in the morning, isn't the thing I'm planning to do. But I decided why I shouldn't treat myself with those that I liked most, if I had come to England to find the reasons for living.

I was right: in an hour I managed to cook sweet-scented drink with marshmallow, to enjoy it and watch Riverdale TV series. I felt better and I was full of enthusiasm.

I opened my copybook full of plans for my being in Manchester for the coming month and chose what I should visit first. Revising them I stopped at item number 8 – talk to Hero. I became moody when I thought of explosive reality. When I took notes on talking with my favourite actor, I realized it would be impossible. But I would like to continue dreaming about this talk before my being asleep. At night my dreams came true for several hours.

I was always an incurable dreamer and now I'm still a dreamer. In spite of the fact that dreamer's heart had been broken. Maybe I exaggerated the only breakup that had changed me a lot. When I realized with my heart that my "happily ever after" would never come with the man, I was terribly upset: I didn't enjoy the meals that seemed to be monotonous as my life. At that moment I started thinking of the reason to continue my life if everything repeated every day – studies, homework, walking, books, and dreams. I lived as if I were in goddamn Groundhog Day. Surely, there were unexpected fun, but my heart was calm only in summertime.

Many people considered me to be a lazy girl who could only miss the lessons. But I really liked careless summer days when I had control over my life. And books helped me to be distracted – I studied deeply a new world where it had both pain and disappointment, but it also had something that was worth of overcoming unbearable problems and troubles.

Not every book that I had read touched my soul. But those which I liked had not been forgotten for a long time. I noticed a track of the read books in everyday life. This track was associated with the facts that I chose hot chocolate for breakfast, sometimes I read e-book instead of paper books, I touched my mouth while laughing. Most of the books that I had collected for my library touched me a lot and changed my soul. Thanks to them, I became myself; I felt my changing for the better. Literature helped me to gain necessary life experience. But no one is insured against making mistakes, isn't it? Either Tessa Young, Liesel Meminger or me – whatever you have read.

By 11:00 I had managed to arrange the things a little in the house the way I liked. I put them on different places so that they made the room cosy, though cosiness was temporary. I put my autumn dishes of golden orange colours in the kitchen; I hang blue soft towels that made me think of clear sky in the bathroom. In the bedroom I also put a couple of aroma candles of raspberry taste that made me think of careless summer.

Every May I planned my long-expected summer holidays. Mainly, I went on tours around the city that was the way I loved spending my vacations. In spite of the fact that summer was over I was planning to spend a wonderful time now. Surely, I would take in mind photos that helped me to keep experiences and to underline beautiful autumn colours in the outside world.

Have rented the car, I was driving to the centre of the city where I started walking. It was important not to forget where I had parked. To be sure I marked the street in the map in my phone.

In an hour of my walking, after I had enjoyed playful autumn sun, formidable parks and surrounding landscapes, I decided to have lunch in a nearby cafe. I had already found it in the map and now I was anxious to see it expecting delicious meals. But at a 2-minute distance I saw Him.

At first, it seemed to me that I was mistaken. But I looked at him more attentively and I realized that I was right. A tall brunet with shortly cut hair stood a step-distance from me. Only at that moment I realized I hadn't been breathing for the last seconds that seemed to be eternity. As soon as I opened my mouth to say Hi to the main hero of my dreams, he came closer abruptly and made gestures to make me talk more quietly so we could avoid crowds of his fans. In fact, I wasn't going to cry over the street, as if I were a mad fan. Who did he take me for? On the other hand, how could he recognize me otherwise?

Hero came closer and I saw a joyful smile in spite of the fact it was social. We greeted each other and talked a little. I told him I appreciated his creative work. After that we took photos. While we were taking photos, Hero bent down to me and I smelled a strawberry perfume mixed with tobacco.

A second when I took the photo of my dream lasted as if several hours had passed but after that it flew away. Hero left me without saying goodbye.

I felt sorrow in my heart though I was glad to see him. The reason wasn't the cigarettes, I knew he was smoking. It wasn't also because of his social smile that made my world shine for a short moment. The true reason was that Hero talked to me as if I were one of his fans. But actually I was his fan. What would I expect? I hoped he would fall in love with me from the first sight; we would start a family, would go to London and would live happily ever after. Such things didn't happen even in movies – actors aren't fall in love with their fans. That's it!

I would like to get acquainted with normal Hero: I'd like to know what he's thinking about, what makes him happy and even what his favourite dish is. But we were not lucky to be born under a lucky star – life of an actor and his fan will never be crossed. Even in my craziest dream.