Im Not Supposed To Be Here

Chapter 17

April's POV

My worst nightmare. Chris and I are stuck in this alley, police behind us, and absolutely nowhere to go. I feel like I'm in one of those movies where my mind has a thousand thoughts racing through it at a time. It's been a wild time away from home, leaving with someone I barely knew, running through woods, being attacked by animals, bonding with Chris, being his girlfriend, getting shot at.  I can't believe that this adventure may really be over. If I get taken back home, I know I'm grounded for life, no phone and no Chris, hell my ma might grab the belt and go old school on my ass. But if I stay here, maybe explain to the cop that we're in love, that I ran away on purpose and that I'm fine then he'll let us go. But then again my poor ma, I haven't given her a second thought since I've been away and I know she's probably scared thinking about where I've been. Ugh...these thoughts are invading my mind.

I'm holding Chris's hand and we're just frozen. I look over and his head is down. I don't know if he's thinking of a plan or if he thinks he's defeated but I know he doesn't want to lose me...or at least I hope he doesn't want this to be over.

"Hands in the air", the cop says. "You two separate"
I only squeeze his hand harder because I can't bear the thought of letting him go. Maybe I'm being irrational but if I think about it, all of my decisions up to this point have been somewhat irrational.

"I won't repeat myself, let go of each others hands and place them in the air." The officer says.

This causes Chris to look over at me; a somber look on his face. I feel that he's not holding onto my hand as tight as he was before. Oh no...he's going to let me go, I can feel it. Oh my gosh, what if they arrest him because they think he kidnapped me. Could he go to jail? I start to panic and grab his hand even harder which makes him wince.

"Princess, you need to let go now" he whispers.
A tear falls from my eyes as I realize that this really might be the end of my adventure.
"No Chris please, there must be some way that I don't have to go home." I plead.
" Go home", he says, "See your mom, tell her you're sorry, tell her I'm sorry. This was a mistake April. I was wrong for having someone bring you to me. I was selfish and didn't think about how it would make others feel. I-"
I cut him off, "I thought you cared for me, wanted to protect me and have adventures and I don't know be with me. Chris you can't just give up!" I yell.
At this point, I realize that we must look crazy standing in front of this officer having a heart to heart conversation as I'm on the verge of tears but I don't care. 
" April please, I don't know how to protect you. We've been moving too fast. You're 18 and should be doing things like college, not living in a winded housing and sneaking through cities with me. If it's meant to be princess, then I promise we'll see eachother soon, but for now you have to go." Chris says.

At this point, my slow motion ends and reality rushes in. The officer is walking briskly towards us, Chris let's go of my hand and I'm full on crying. I don't even feel my legs moving as I'm being moved into the car and Chris is out into a separate vehicle. Everything is a blur on the drive to the airport and I barely notice the clouds in the sky on the flight back home. I feel numb, like I can't function with Chris being next to me and I can't even muster up enough excitement to see my mom. Pulling into the driveway, I see that she's on the porch and I don't know whether I'm going to get a hug or if I'm getting scolded. I take a breathe and one foot in front of the other exit the car when my mom is already sprinting towards me to give me a hug.
" Where the hell were you?! I was worried sick, calling friends and relatives and checking the school! I was running around this city like a mad woman and when I couldn't find you that was the most heartbreaking thing in the world!" She takes a breath for a second and then her tone changes.
"Well aren't you going to answer me? Where'd you go? Who were you with and you didn't call, why the hell didn't you call?"
It's at this point that I know that this day is going to feel like an inquisition and I'm not sure I'm up for it, but I try to think of an apology.
"Ma I own up to what I did, I ran away because I was super upset about my party being ruined and because I felt like you embarrassed me. But I'm this time I met someone and he's sweet and cares for me and protected me!"
To this I get a laugh in my face. "Protects you?" She laughs. "Is that why you're all scratched up around your ankle and your Jordan's look like they've been torn to shreds? Who is this guy April? I want him locked up for the rest of his life!" She says as she walks us inside. She motions for me to go upstairs and shower and tells me she wants to talk after I'm all clean. Before I even make it up the stairs she hold out her palm and already knowing what she wants, I reluctantly place my phone into her waiting hand before matching up the stairs.

I try having an attitude, I really do, but it feels so nice to shower in my own home and be greeting with an actual home cooked meal. But after that, my night turns into more questions about where I was in which my answer was "I don't know". She asked who drove me, and my answer, "I don't know". "What city, any landmarks? Where was he keeping you?" " I really don't know", I answer, "A fancy cabin in the middle of now where. It's no big deal, he didn't hurt me."
"He could've done anything to you" she says.
" But he didn't" I reply, "He likes me, calls me princess and never laid a hand on me."
" You're my little girl", my ma says, a tear sliding down her cheek, " He took my little girl"
And suddenly I realize that this wasn't all on Chris like I was starting to think. I was so stupid by packing all of my shit and climbing out of the window. His driver could've done anything to me. Chris couldn't left me stranded in the woods. My mother was worried sick about whether I was alive! And then a small part of me called out and told me to think of Chris. Sure he was rude sometimes, immature, a little rough around the edges and didn't always have the best ideas but he's caring and thoughtful and the type of guy who plans dates and takes the time to ask me what I want to do. I missed him. But I didn't know how to get back to him. He occupied my mind all night and I couldn't help but think how difficult it was going to be to fall asleep without him next to me. Trying not to cry I strip my clothes and throw an oversized tee on and crawl into bed.
"Chris", I whisper, "Wherever you are, come back to me. It's meant to be, I just know it"
And after what feels like the longest day of my life, my eyelids finally get heavy and I drift to sleep.

At some point during the night, I wake up to the sound of something hitting my window. Rubbing my eye in confusion, I wait to hear the sound again and almost 30 seconds later something else hits my window. Frustrated and sleep-deprived I throw off the covers and throw the curtains open. Looking out the window I see nothing, so I turn around ready to climb back into bed only to hear the sound again. I rush back to the window and cup my hands around my eyes like a telescope and I almost fall backwards in surprise... it's Chris.