Bee Hive Reviews

#11 Death's Purgatory Investigator

REVIEW OF: Death's Purgatory Investigator.

Author: akeila_agramunn, thespadeandace

Reviewer: 2storytime

╔═══*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*══════*.·:·.☽✧ ✦ ✧☾.·:·.*═══╗

Chaserless whiskey, books without brains, clients desperate for affirmation- Those were the ingredients chosen to create the most perfect of reviews. But suddenly! A secret ingredient was added to ths concoction. The chemical, X....stasy! His unforeseen high.

Welcome one and all as I decide the fate of this book, be it hellish and sinful, or heavenly delightful? Jokes, I'm not that deep, just a tripped up slurring bastard. But that won't stop me from delivering this review... mostly because my boss will kill me if I don't.

Now grab your detective's magnifying glass and trench coat and let's get to reviewing.

COVER AND TITLE: 4.5/5

First off, I fucking love your title. It's so simple yet precise. It's just like a detective TV show's title.

I also appreciated the play on words using Purgatory for the "P" in P.I, good job.

The cover was really cool too. I like covers that are on the simpler side but that's personal preference so I did not chuck points. The sickle and magnifying glass were what got me the most because I'm most excited to see the buddy cop angle between Chase and Mr. D ....for death not dick. Fucking horny perverts.

BLURB: 1.5/5

Your blurb just didn't do it for me whatsoever. I read it after reading the book and yeah, major snooze fest. The blurb just didn't have any of the energy that was present in the book. I'd suggest you utilize Chase's entertaining first person narration during the blurb as well. Also, pick a fun scene that doesn't reveal too much, maybe that funny scene where he talks to the Vaccine hater just to show a taste of what's to come.

Currently, it's bland as hell and it's a potential boner killer. Like for example, you tried teasing that the ginger Jezebel chick was a half demon. Bitch I don't wanna know that in the blurb because when I read the chapter she appears, I was genuinely curious. So don't let shit like that slip.

PROLOGUE: 1/10

You know this shit is in my criteria so don't go acting shocked. You didn't have one but that intro thingy was cute AF. Two friends working together to enter ONC (Which I still think sounds like a vaginal infection or scrotum eating parasite.) #ComeformewattpadAnyway, In honour of friends the world over, I'll be giving you a pity point and a line of unspecified white powder, now sniff.... your one point.

PREMISE: 10 /10Fuck! I'm starting a new petition.#NetflixoranyonewithshittonsofmoneylyingaroundmakeDeath'sPurgatoryDetectiveafuckingshowinsteadofanymoreofthatdumbcrapyoulikefinancingI don't think it's a mouthful, do you? Yeah I think it will really get buzz for this book to be made into a tv show cause it's just that good. No, really.

A mostly unfulfilled P.I dies and goes to the afterlife. Death, tells him that his death file has gotten lost. How? Who the fuck knows? So death and Chase have to go on the... chase... for the lost file so he can go on to heaven or hell.

Personally, I think this bitch is going to hell. That's right, I saw you watching that furry porno and dreaming about wild cats, Chase!

No but seriously, this premise lends itself to a lot of opportunity. One could explore topics like the value of human life and fulfillment. Also, the duo learning the challenges that the other faces. I don't know if the focus will be on the unlikely duo of Chase and Death but that's an opportunity I can see.