The Clockmaker's Shadow | ONC 2021 | LGBT

19. Proposition

(Author's Note: This chapter is dedicated to Nacht_Owl a long time supporter of  my stories, and the ONC
Counting down now - around 19K words  with this chapter...)

"I think he's gone..." smiled Aron, but he had spoken too soon. There was Shadow, hiding away, a tiny tight ball in the back of his mind, holding himself as still as possible. Feeling crushed with disappointment, Aron sank back into his chair.

"He doesn't want to go," he admitted, dispiritedly. "He's lonely, I get it! But he can't fix that by living in my head! It's driving me crazy!"

"What do you mean, he's lonely?" asked Rik.

"Apparently, I'm the only person he has been able to communicate with, since... I don't know, whenever... He can't seem to remember how long he's been here."

Rik zoned out again for a moment, thinking back. He was twenty-six now, at least he thought he was considering all the jumping around between worlds, so that would make Jaxon about twenty. If he had transported at eighteen, as Rik had, that would mean he had been in some ghastly sort of limbo for two years.

Unable to communicate, Aron had said. Able to see the world but not participate. Was it any wonder that Jaxon had gone crazy? Not that Rik was condoning the murders, but-

"Do you think drugs would work?" asked Aron, interrupting Rik's train of thought. "Or else I'll have to live all the time with the lights turned up as bright as possible... that, or have a physician cut him out of my head," he added drily.

Rik dragged his thoughts back to the present. Aron was in genuine distress, and Rik couldn't help feeling partly responsible. Afterall, he was the person linked to Jaxon. If Rik hadn't come to this world, then Jaxon wouldn't have followed him and Aron would not have been involved.

And even more distressing, if Rik hadn't gone to Mercer, then Ari would still be alive. And Nat, in the world before that.

He knew their deaths weren't his fault, but he still felt strangely guilty.

He glanced across at Ned and swallowed. Thank heavens he had refused his advances the other night, or Ned might have been Shadow's next target.

Rik's heart sank as he realized what he had to do. There was no choice. He would have to jump worlds again and leave Ned and Aron behind. Jaxon would follow him and then Ned and Aron would be safe.

Or would he, though? Could Rik rely on that? Jaxon seemed pretty determined to stick with Aron. What if Rik left and Jaxon stayed here? Given that Rik had never managed to return to a world once he had left it, everything would be out of his control. He would never know what happened to Aron and Ned. More than that, wherever he went next, he would never be free, never able to start a relationship; always fearing that Jaxon would choose that moment to resume his pursuit. Putting everyone he befriended at risk.

Rik looked up to see Aron staring at him, his expression full of desperate hope.

"I could leave, but I'm not certain Jaxon would come with me," Rik said, regretfully.

Aron's face fell and he stood up, his hands twisting over each other. "I have to go," he announced abruptly. "I'm sorry, I can't-"

"Wait!" An idea blossomed in Rik's mind. Something he had just said... If it worked, it would be hard, maybe too hard, but also strangely fitting. He spoke quickly, before he could dwell too much on the possible consequences.

"What if Jaxon came to me instead?"

"What?"

"I'm suggesting Jaxon leave you and come to me. I'll look after him."

"You mean... you're willing to have him inside your head? Are you serious?" Aron was struggling between hope and sheer disbelief that anyone would volunteer to have this happen to them.

"I was never more serious in my life. He's my brother. He's my responsibility. And maybe I can help him. We grew up together, so I know his history. Perhaps I can help him change, become more like the boy I remember. More human."

"So how do we do this?" asked Aron, desperate to accept Rik's offer immediately in case he changed his mind.

"Can you talk to him? Explain what I'm offering? I don't know if he understands I'm his brother and what that means, but the important thing from his point of view is that he'd be coming to a willing host, not someone who'd be constantly fighting him."

Aron's face went blank while he communicated with Shadow, trying to put the offer in terms that would appeal to Shadow rather than expressing his own frantic desire to be free.

Eventually his eyes refocused but he didn't look as happy as Rik had expected.

"He's agreeable, I think, but he doesn't know how he got into me in the first place."

"What happened at the time?"

"I remember falling on top of him, but after that..." Aron looked defeated.

"Well let's try a hug and see what happens," said Rik, briskly.

He stood and went across to Aron then put his arms around him. His body felt hard and unyielding through his clothes, as tight as an over-wound clock spring. Under other circumstances Rik would have enjoyed the embrace, but this situation was anything but romantic.

They stood there for a few minutes but as far as Rik could tell, nothing happened.

Ned came over.

"Were you dressed at the time?" he asked Aron, tactfully.

"No," admitted Aron. "I was undressed, asleep in bed before he woke me."

"Well, before we go as far as that, let's see what happens when you put your faces together." Ned smiled despite himself. "Cheek to cheek? Skin against skin? That might be what's needed."

"Or forehead to forehead?" suggested Rik, hastily. After all, it seemed that was where Shadow was located.

Ned shrugged. "Try both, it can't hurt."

Rik looked up at Aron, and braced himself. "Let's do this."

Aron lowered his head until they touched, forehead against forehead.

For a long moment, all Rik felt was the warmth of Aron's skin.

And then, something slithered into his mind, curling round and round until it settled in the back of his head.