Healing Hearts

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Victor narrowed his eyes and smiled. He took a step towards James, lifted his hand, and rested it on James' chest. "Oh, don't be shy." His fingers moved up, over James' neck and grabbed his chin. He was grinning.

James' full attention was fixated on Victor, on his face, on his movements, on how intense his eyes looked. James was hypnotized.

"You should breathe before you pass out." Victor's face was so close now, the steam of his breath was falling on James' face.

"I'm breathing," James said, and mentally slapped himself. His brain was jelly and couldn't hold any coherent thought.

Victor hummed; his nose was touching James'. "I never took you for a shy guy."

James held Victor's waist. "I'm not shy," he said, his heart thumping in his chest like a herd of racing elephants.

"You're so easy to tease." Victor smiled, taking a step back.

James leaned forward, instinctively followed him, still wanting a kiss. Victor puffed a laugh, tilted his head, and pressed his lips against James'. But it was too quick. James was left wanting, craving, but at least he didn't make any goat sounds this time.

"It's not that I don't want to – to – to sleep with you," James stumbled over his words. "How do I put this? I uhm, I want to, but with this trial and everything...and I've been waiting for the right time. I didn't want you to think that sex is the only reason I'm with you."

Victor raised his eyebrows, amused. "How romantic." He smiled. "Who would've thought."

"Stop teasing me." James laughed and pulled him back into a hug. He pressed his forehead against Victor's. "I can't focus if my blood flow is fucked up."

James whined. Victor chuckled, grabbed James' arms, and turned him around, pushing his back against the wall. Victor closed the distance between them, smirking. He was flush against James, which was more than enough to throw James senses into overdrive.

"I think your blood flow works fine," Victor smirked.

James babbled.

"Ok, ok, I'll stop." Victor kissed him again, then took a step back. "Don't feel bad."

James shook his head. "Oh, trust me, I feel far from bad."

Another hum. Another smirk. "Well, I guess we'll talk more about this after the trial."

"Definitely," James said. "Abso-fucking-lutely."

After a few more minutes they walked back inside. The warmth of the house engulfed him, it felt more like home than his parent's place ever did. They found Ollie in the living room, waving around a cat toy that resembled a fishing rod. Freckle was attacking the feather glued at the end of the string with such ferocity one could believe that he was fighting humanity's biggest enemy.

James sat down and kissed Ollie's temple.

He felt lighter now that he was sure that his relationship with Victor wasn't going to turn into a disaster. But James knew he needed to avoid incidents like that in the future. So that evening, he asked Sebastian if he had a few minutes.

"Of course," Sebastian smiled. He patted the spot next to him on the couch. "What's bothering you?"

James sat down. His ears were already burning but he wasn't the type that backed down when uncomfortable, at least he tried to live by that.

"Ugh, how do I put this," James said, his hand reaching behind his head awkwardly. "I think I need some advice. I don't know. I think I have some anger issues that I don't know how to handle."

Sebastian nodded. "Well, don't feel too bad, anger is sometimes a normal reaction. Realizing your flaws and working on fixing them is commendable and it can be difficult. I'm glad you looked past your ego and asked for advice."

James coughed and fidgeted. He was grateful for the words of encouragement but he wasn't sure how he should react, what to say. "I'm trying my best.

"That's the most we can ask out of people. I think everyone can benefit from some therapy. It can be useful to find out the root of the issue. I can help you look into that. Until then, I can give you some tips on how to manage it."

James nodded. "That would be great. And I'm sorry for the trouble," he said.

Sebastian patted his back. "Don't worry, you're basically family now."

The few tips that Sebastian gave him didn't sound that difficult to apply: breathe deeply, repeat calming phrases, but the ones that James found the most useful were the ones that forced him to restructure the way he thought. Instead of convincing himself that everything was awful, horrible, ruined, he should think that yes, this isn't ideal, but an angry outburst will not be productive. Forcing himself to rephrase his thoughts and better communicate his feelings, without shouting, without violence was the most valuable lesson. James was grateful for the help, he was grateful to be accepted in a loving family, to be supported and not ostracized.

He thanked Sebastian again and went upstairs, to Oliver's room. Both Ollie and Victor were there. Freckle was busy kneading Victor's thigh while Ollie was watering flowers in Animal Crossing.

Freckle stopped when James walked in, fixating his round cartoonish eyes on him. James plopped down on the bed and yawned. "What do you want?"

Freckle mewed then continued kneading. Victor smiled, softly and scratched him behind the ear. "He's making biscuits."

"You're already a snack," Ollie said, smiling widely. He looked at Victor. James could swear he saw stars in Oliver's eyes.

"You're too cute, Ollie," Victor said.

"I am." Oliver nodded, looking up from the game. He turned towards James, smiling his biggest smile. "And you should wear tight shirts more often."

James knew that they'll have to return to the courtroom soon, it was a buzzing fly of a thought banging against his skull. He ignored it for now. He was going to watch a bloody, gory, horrible movie with Victor and Oliver and enjoy their company. They were young. They could postpone worrying for one more day.


Author's note<3:

A few lovey-dovey moments to heal our hearts. A little bit of growth. And oh look, FLIRTY VICTOR!

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