is this love?

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Raavi was looking at their wedding photos. While Dev and Rishita looked happy, Raavi and Shiva looked so strained, because at that time, it was forced.

But now? Nothing seemed forced. They both were at ease with each other. Raavi thanks her lucky stars everyday that she got married to Shiva and not Dev.

Dev had nothing to give her, neither love nor friendship. But Shiva? He gave her hate, which morphed into care and affection.

Her love for Dev was just a life long infatuation. If it was love, she wouldn't have forgotten him and moved on in life.

But what did she feel for Shiva? It definitely isn't what she felt for Dev.

Everything wasn't like a fairy tale, it wasn't perfect. But somehow, all the imperfections made everything worth it.

Ironic, isn't it?

~~~

She was enjoying her alone time on the terrace, when she heard a cup fall.

"Sorry, tere liye coffee laa raha tha, par ek cup gir gayi." Shiva said, cleaning up the mess.

He walked over and sat next to her, offering his cup, "Koi baat nahi, hum share kar lenge."

Raavi softened and sipped from the cup, going back and forth while having their conversation.

"Tu idhar aa hi gaya hai, toh mere ek sawaal ka jawab dega? Subah se khaate jaa raha hai." Raavi asked.

"Puch."

"Pyaar kya hota hai?" She asked, looking at him.

Shiva looked at her as if she was dumb.

"I know, I know, tu bolega 'tune Dev se pyaar kiya'. Par aaj mujhe samjha ki woh pyaar nahi tha. Ek childhood crush tha, infatuation tha, jo fairy tale ko maine aankh bandh karke maan liya. Galti meri hai, maanti hu. Par ab aur ek galti nahi karna chahti."

"Bata na, pyaar kya hota hai?"

"Pyaar? Pyaar baarish ki tarah hota hai. Nahi hota, toh uske aana ka intezaar karte hai. Aur aa jata hai, toh jaane nahi de sakte. Par jab hota hai, tab sab khila khila sa lagta hai."

"Ek sukoon sa milta hai. Woh insaan se jhagda bhi karo, toh bin bataye sulajh jaata hai. Ek dusre ko samajhna, sukh dukh me saath rehkar usse baatna, ek dusre ko khone ka darr. Ye sab pyaar nahi toh kya hai?"

Shiva looked at her, but she was looking ahead. Pondering over his words.

" Par tu ye sab kyu puch rahi hai? Kisi se pyaar ho gaya kya?" Shiva chuckled.

"Shaayad." Raavi replied.

It broke Shiva inside. She loved someone, but if it was him, she wouldn't be asking these questions to him. He gulped it down, like always.

"Accha chal. Mai tujhe kuch sawaal puchta hu, aur jo bhi tere dimaag me aaye, woh hi tera pyaar hai. Par answer batana mat." She nodded and closed her eyes.

He didn't want to know. She wanted to.

"Dusri ladkiya jab flirt karti hai uske saath, jalan hoti hai?"

Yes.

A familiar slowly appeared in front of her with every increasing question, like putting together a puzzle.

"Agar tujhe usse chodna pada, chodegi?"

Never.

"Woh kaisa bhi ho, tujhe manzoor hai?"

Absolutely.

"Uski awaaz sunke sukoon milta hai?"

Ekdum.

"Usse agar apni saari khushiyan deni ho, toh degi?"

All. Yes.

"Uske saare dukh mitane hai?"

Saare ke saare

"Uske saath tu apna bachpana bina sharminda hoye, baat sakti hai?"

Woh toh pehle bhi kiya karti thi. Uske saath badi hui hoon.

"Usko saari kamiya, jo logo ko dikhti hai, tu woh andekha kar sakti hai? "

Uski kamiya usko dusro se alag banati hai.

"Agar woh khush hai, toh tu khush ho sakti hai?"

Woh jab bhi khush hota hai, mujhe andar se itna accha lagta hai, I can't explain.

"Last question. Apne family photo me, usse dekh paati hai?"

She imagined a picture where she had her own small family with him.

With Shiva.

Her eyes shot open.

"Dikha tujhe apna pyaar?" He smiled and got up.

Her eyes followed him until he was out of sight.

The puzzle was complete. Every piece made sense, fit properly, and showed her the answer.

She knew now. Why, how, where, when, and what her true emotions were.

Love.

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