Noble Hope| General Kirigan

𝟘𝟘𝟡

{Chapter nine}

AFTER THE INITIAL SHOCK OF BEING IN SUCH CLOSE PROXIMITY OF EACH OTHER, ALEKSANDER AND ADALINE SILENTLY RODE BACK TO THE LITTLE PALACE WHERE HE LEFT HER TO PREPARE FOR THEIR TRAINING. He had parted with nothing more than, "Meet me in my study in an hour," and a nod of his head. 

Adaline had never been more conflicted in her life. She knew she had feelings for the man in some way and was nearly certain he had emotions of his own for her, but the way he let his walls collapse only to let them rise at the last second made her worry. 

She wouldn't call whatever she was feeling love, or, not yet anyway. She felt she hadn't known him long enough to determine that, but regardless she knew she felt strongly. 

He made her feel something other than fear for everyone around her. She couldn't describe how fearful she had been anytime Mal left base for a mission back in the First Army. Or when Alina tripped and nearly broke her arm when she was seventeen. Adaline was only twenty and had no medical experience.

They all joined the first army when Mal and Alina were sixteen and Adaline roughly nineteen. As a young adult, attempting to take care of her little 'siblings', including Mal, was hard. When addressed, Adaline was responsible for the two, and she feared losing them every second of the day. 

But Aleksander...Saints, did he make her feel. 

She could feel everything, even if she didn't want to. At first, that fear stayed, but only because she wasn't ready to accept what her life was as she did now. Then it was a brief moment of anger towards him, and finally understanding after she watched the Grisha around her back away in fear. 

In the same fear she used to hold. 

Now, she couldn't tell what the hell she was feeling. 

The only kind of love Adaline had ever felt was for her family and a pet snake she had found in the fields behind the orphanage that had grown fond of her. But now, Adaline was uncertain. 

This couldn't be love. 

Right?

She contemplated this all as she was walking slowly back to her room when a body suddenly slammed into hers. She stumbled a bit, losing her balance, and blinked a couple of times to get a clear look at who she bumped into so she could apologize. "I'm sorry–"

"Addy!" 

Internally, Adaline groaned at the familiar voice of her little sister. She glared at the younger girl through her lashes. "Didn't see you there." she began to walk forward again. "I need to get going." 

Before she could get far, a small hand wrapped around the forearm of her black kefta. "Addy, can we talk please?" 

"I don't know what you expect me to say, Alina." Adaline sighed and turned to face the slightly shorter girl, meeting her identical dark eyes. "I'm happy here." she shrugged. 

"You're happy with the Darkling?" Alina asked, her eyes wide and almost filled with tears. Of course, she partially trusted Kirigan, but he still seemed a little off to Alina. 

Adaline grew angry once again and scoffed. "What is it with you, Alina? I am a Darkling, alright? I get it, you're Ravka's savior, the great Sankta Alina. We've read the istorii. I know them better than anyone. To everyone else, I'm some reminder of something I'm not responsible for, and Alek- Kirigan, is too."