Destine to be His (Eren Jaeger x reader)

Guilty Eyes

PREVIOUS CHAPTER SUMMARY: General Magath has been being tortured for information. Y/n is used as part of the investigation, led by Eren. Magath reveals that before y/n and Eren's wedding, Marley had formed an alliance with a bunch of other countries to stand against Paradise. The project is called El Mundo (cuz it is the world against Paradise), where they are building a bunch of bombs on a nearby Peninsula to destroy Paradise. 

*Slight blood warning for this chapter.*

...

What am I doing?

You stare at yourself in the mirror. You are in a dark, concrete bathroom somewhere nearby the 'investigation' room. You were hardly able to bring yourself to focus once they took you out of that wretched room. The bathroom is dimly lit, with no windows or sun, just a pair of low lanterns by the door. 

It's been a long time since you'd had the chance to see your own reflection, and now you could hardly recognize yourself. Your hair had gown long, you skin had become weather beaten from being outside, and there were dark rings under your eyes. Your eyes scared you. Cold and distant. They lacked the warmth someone would expect of a noble lady of your age, born and raised in comfort, but then again it made sense. 

Your life had become anything but comfortable. 

But it is the burns that catch your gaze. Your eyes drift down to your neck, which is plastered in angry yellowish welts and puckering cuts, burnt closed. Only a few drops of blood have slipped down your chest and been absorbed into the neck of your dirty white shirt. 

 You gingerly run your finger along the wounds, wincing in slight pain here and there. To be honest it wasn't as bad as you'd expected, but you still hated them. 

"I wish I could heal them for you." You tense as you hear Eren's voice behind you. You in the mirror as he enters the small bathroom. You see his own hands smoking and he opens his palms to reveal where he must have burnt himself as well. It looks intentional, his eyes soft, like he wanted to feel your pain as well, but you do not take the peace offering.

You know that titan shifters need to inflict self harm to transform, Eren burning himself is no more a favor to you than it is to himself. You think bitterly. 

When Eren takes a step closer to you, you flinch, backing away slightly. His eyes widen like he'd been slapped in the face, and he choses to stay back and give you space. Instead opting to time-out himself to the back corner of the room, leaning against the wall. 

You slowly return to tending to your wounds. You apply some salve to the cuts before wrapping them in bandaging to keep them from getting infected. You watch Eren carefully through the mirror the entire time, still not at ease with his presence. 

The silence seems to be killing the titan shifter behind you. His eyes sad as he scrabbles for something to say. "Do they hurt?" Eren mutters dumbly after a moment. 

You stare at him through the mirror, tossing your hair to the side to allow you to wrap the bandaging around your neck. "...it's okay." You mutter softly. As pissed off as you are at him for betraying you like that, you are still too terrified of what he's proven himself capable of.

Eren seems too know this, as he looks down shamefully, instead focusing his gaze on a spot of dirt of the floor. 

After another moment of painful silence you finish, turning to Eren finally but keeping your distance. He nods thoughtfully, before turning to the door. You follow after him, keeping your distance. 

Outside the garish sunlight burns your eyes. Eren is greeted by a group of soldiers and a wagon. One of them salutes him. "Zeke and Yelena are waiting in the meeting spot." The soldier tells Eren. 

Eren nods slowly. The guilty look is now gone from his eyes and all essence of the apologetic man you'd seen in the bathroom is gone, replaced by an intimidating predator. His posture is relaxed, but the look in his eye is deadly. 

It hits you with a pang of sadness, but also regret. How could you have ever trusted this traitor? It was always a lie. Just whatever was convenient for him so that he could kill more and create more bloodshed. 

A monster.

You feel your skin grow cold, and that giddy feeling in your heart you'd had only the night before goes sour. It was all a lie.

And the worst part, is that Eren wins. General Magath just gave away the last secret that could have saved the world, all because of you. Now this is nothing left to save what remains of Marley and the rest of the World. 

It is over.

"I will meet you at the rendezvous point." Eren mutters lowly to the Jaegerists before him. A group of mounted soldiers join Eren, bringing him a horse. They wave goodbye to the other party with the wagon, who takes off in a different direction.  

"And be careful!" One of the mounted soldiers calls after the wagon. "These woods could be crawling with Survey Corps members, make sure that you are not followed!" 

Eren's gaze darkens at the mention of his former associates. "The Survey Corps will not be an issue for us." He growls lowly and everyone pauses to listen. His green eyes flash with venom as he speaks, and you don't doubt that his thoughts could kill. "They do not have the numbers nor intel to track us. By the time they find out about the Peninsula and our plans, it will be too late." Eren spits, taking the leathers reins of his horse into his hands. The same hands that burned you... "And I intend to keep it that way." 

Eren's words are followed by a cold silence as everyone moves to fidget with their gear or look away. No one wants to be responsible for messing up. No one dares defy Eren Jaeger.

"Take me with you!" You act before you can think, throwing your arms around Eren's waist and tucking your face into his chest. Eren's body feels like hot iron against your skin, his cruelty still fresh in your mind as your instincts scream at you to run but you hold tight.  

You know what you have to do.

Eren stills before slowly turning to face you. "What?" He stares at you in surprise but the rest of his face remains emotionless. 

You look up at him slowly, trying to for as much patheticness into your eyes as possible in hopes that he might actually believe it. "I don't want to be alone." You whine, burring your face into his chest. 

Eren stares down at you for a moment. The soldiers around you avert their gazes, making busy work with their saddles and gear to avoid interfering. Eren pets your hair softly after a moment before sighing. "Okay y/n." He mutters and you hug him tighter. 

Eren climbs up onto his horse before helping you up behind him. You hold onto his back. You hate being so close to the titan shifter. Every nerve in your body is constantly screaming at you to get away. He is a liar, he is a cheater, he only says what you want to hear for his own gain, but you cuddle closer to him nonetheless.

Why?

Because now you know what you have to do...

...

The previous chapter got a lot of positive reactions and so I just wanted to say thank you so much for that! I really love this little community and your feedback totally fuels my writing and makes me want to keep working on this story even when it's hard! You are all such sunshines and you make me laugh so much, I love you all to pieces! <3 

I hope you have a great day, and if it's not daytime please go to bed lol

You are so amazing! Please take care of yourselves and have a good one!

-author :D