"Please keep your arms and legs inside the tram at all times. But allow your spirit to roam free in Geotopia" Brooke announced as the herd went gliding through the mountains of crystals
"I have a good feeling about this. Maybe he'll be able to help us" Peaches smiled
"She did say he knows all. And all's a lot!" Julian echoed
"No wonder they live in here, it's phenomenal" Noa commented
"You're right, it is phenomenal" Kai replied
They reached a platform and all exited their hovering crystals and followed Brooke
"Here he is. The Master of Meditation, the Supreme Serene, the four-time Heavy Thoughts champion of the world!" Brooke sang as she presented a large mountain of crystals with something reddish and looking oddly like a butt on one leg
A gong rang and a head poked out of the butt, the herd stated as the thing untwisted itself and swung his limbs around until it stood upright on one leg and slid into a bowl as an anteater jumped to catch it
"Is that a llama? I hate llamas. They spit and smell" Granny cranked as she waddled away
"So does she" Diego muttered to Shira
"So do we!" The possum twins exclaimed as they high-fived
The llama bounced off the mountain and performed a bunch of twists and flips with his legs until he landed on the ground and walked over to an incense burner on his ears as the anteaters vacuumed the various crystals off his path and then his fur, which tickled the llama
"Greetings, mammals! The Shangri Llama will see yooooouuuuuuuu... Now" the Shangri Llama greeted as he looked at them while holding his head upside down as he held the incense stick
"Ooh. Wonderful. So where is he?" Buck asked the llama as he didn't saw an animal of importance
"He is here. Talking to you" the llama replied
"Oh, I get it. He's a ventriloquist and you're the dummy" Sid replied confidently
"No, you're the dummy" the llama replied as he threw the incense stick away
"No, you're the dummy" Sid replied as the two went back and forth
"This is the guy that's going to save us" Diego muttered
"I think I'd rather get hit by the asteroid" Kai sighed as Noa shoulder-bumped him
"Look within. You're the dummy" the llama said as he spit and silenced the argument
"Disgusting! Loved that! New topic. We're all about to die" Buck said as he made his presence known
"Well, that's no good. Stress is a killer. Let us loosen our limbs and open up our minds. Downward Dog!" The llama announced as he rested his forelegs and his butt in the air
"Uh... Seriously?" Manny asked
"I'll wait. I have all the time in the world" the Shangri Llama replied patiently
Manny and Diego groaned and then they and Sid forced themselves into the same position
"Actually, you don't have all the time in the world. None of us do. You see, there's this thing in the sky" Buck said as he gestured up the crystal ceiling where the glowing light of the asteroid was clearly visible
"Oh. That blinding light that seems to get larger by the minute? What about it? Seems fine to me" the Shangri Llama shrugged as he got into another position
"With all due respect, Your Twistiness, that's an asteroid. It's magnetically attracted to this place and it's heading straight for us" Buck explained as the llama spit again
"Aha! It must desire our magnetic crystals, well, who can blame it? They're really quite something. Did you know their power grants eternal youth? I am over 400 years old. Mmm-Hmm" the Shangri Llama replied
"That's not possible" Diego said
"Sure it is. I'm 326! Whoo!" The bunny replied
"Huh! You don't look a day over 275" Granny said
"We are young, happy and safe. And we always will be. Thanks to Geotopia!" The Shangri Llama's voice echoed throughout the asteroid
"Kudos. It is lovely. Now, let's figure out a way to launch it into space!" Buck suggested
"I'm sorry. You want to destroy our home?" The Shangri Llama asked distressed
"It'll be destroyed either way. But if we propel this magnetic material into the atmosphere, we can change the asteroid's path and save everyone. What do you say?" Buck asked as the Shangri Llama grinned at him for a moment
"Caterpillar!" The llama yelled as he flopped onto his back and curled his legs into himself
"So, is that a yes? Or-" Diego started when the llama grabbed him and stretched the saber out with his legs
"Oh, you are storing a lot of hostility in your lower spine" the llama said as Diego ended up being in the namaste position
"Shangri Llama, how are we gonna-" Manny started
"Funky Chicken. Jiggy Jellu. Mashed Potato" the llama interrupted as he bounced all over the place
"Your flexibility is a sight to behold. Now how the devil are we going to launch these crystals?" Buck demanded
"You can't. It's impossible" the Shangri Llama replied innocently as he added
"Whoo! I am bushed"
He hopped back onto his mountain and twisted himself in the same position they first saw him in
"Awesome meeting you guys. Feel free to hang or, you know, whatever" the llama said as he talked out of his butt, he spit one more time before sticking his head all the way back in
"That's it. He was our last hope. We're doomed" Peaches sighed sadly as she was close to tears
"Yeah. All we got was a free yoga class" Diego sneered
"On that subject, could you help me, please? My nose is dangerously close to my butt" Sid pleased as he hoped over to them on one leg as his body was all tangled up in a knot
"Uh, Sid, why do you have two tails?" Diego asked as he cringed
"I'm in here too" Granny replied from the bundle of fur as Sid chuckled nervously
The herd untangled Sid and Granny and then all collectively went their separate ways with their significant other and spending as much time with the one they loved as long they could
Noa and Kai sat on the edge of the crystal cliff as Noa looked at the light of the asteroid trough the crystal ceiling
She sobbed as she hurried her face into her knees
"Hey, don't cry, shh" Kai soothed as he hugged his girlfriend as Noa buried her face into his chest
"Try to see it from the bright side. We'll relive everything. Our first meeting, our adventures... our first kiss... and will be in love with you all over again" Kai whispered in Noa's ear as Noa's sobbing has faded
"You're the only one for me, Kai" Noa replied as she nuzzled Kai's chest
Kai smiled as he looked down at Noa, he suddenly spotted a little crystal on the ground and it had the perfect shape for a ring... a wedding ring
He picked up the crystal and put it into his pocket
Soon, they were interrupted by a rumbling sound as the ceiling began to shake and the crystals quivered around them
Suddenly, the top of the previous asteroid collapsed and exposed all the inside to the open
Noa and Kai knew immediately what went wrong
"Are you kidding me?" Kai groaned
"Uncle Sid" Noa sighed as she rolled her eyes
YOU ARE READING
Ice Age: Collision Course
FanfictionTime has passed and Peaches got engaged with Julian, Manny and Ellie had their anniversary and it seems like everyone has someone to love, except Sid. And when a deadly asteroid threatens the entire earth's survival, Sid wondered if he'll ever find...
