"you do realize she's going to find out who you are right"
"well, when in rome."
"we're in new york but okay."
i refer to everyone (aside from people who, to my knowledge, have spoken up about their discomfort with it) as their real names.
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_____________ KARL POV
"the video is doing really well but there a lot of comments on how sad you look." jimmy tells me, walking to sit next to me on chandler's couch.
i roll my eyes, something i've done a lot in the past few weeks, "i don't look sad! they overanalyze everything it's always like that."
chris pipes up from the other side of me, "yeah but we were there with you and we know you were sad."
i scoff, shaking my head as chandler nods in agreement. "it's not like i cried,"
i stand up with a small wave of my hand. "on video."
they chuckle as i walk past the kitchen to the bathroom, the sound of their chatting droning out as i get farther away. i quickly find the familiar bathroom and close the door, sighing.
i drop my hand to my pocket, picking up my phone and unlocking it. i immediately go to instagram, getting a notification that jude posted.
it's multiple pictures of her in different poses in front of a mirror in her room showing off her rings and outfit but the thing that stands out the most to me is her hair, she cut bangs. and they look great on her. she looks great. beautiful as always and happy.
she looks happy.
i'm glad she's happy. she deserves it.
maybe the fans were right, i was sad in that video but to be fair at the time of filming i had just gotten dumped the day prior and alex and sapnap and literally everyone but the beast team wouldn't talk to me. which i deserved.
they only spoke to me when we streamed the week after we all went home. alex texted me that he isn't mad at me because everyone else is and 'i needed someone on my side' which i did.
i fight the urge to ask about judith every single day including on streams but he let me know she isn't mad anymore and is nice to him.
but she hasn't answered my texts and the one time she did was to ask me to stop. she's never going to forgive me and i honestly deserve it.
i was super shitty for the entire time i was with her and i dragged other people into it.
i'm just as awful as miles. at least he was honest with her about me even if it out of spite.
i swallow and decide to like her post, it's not like she'll see it anyways she gets like over a thousand likes per post, she's pretty popular at her school.
