Rebuilt

Chapter 18

I could tell Sam and Buvky were pissed off at me because when they were discussing our next move neither of them looked at me or even acknowledged my existence so I just sat on the couch picking at my hands...trying to stop myself from crying. My leg bounced anxiously aswell. I didn't feel bad I was just upset that I upset Bucky and Sam. How could I possibly be so idiotic...I thought that they hated me...well I wouldn't have blamed them.

Eventually Sam and Buck stopped talking...probably looking at me. The headache from earlier engrained itself back into my head and the dull ache returned to my shoulder. I hadn't really felt it that often but that was due to the lack of rest but now that I had time to think about it I did. My head wasn't exactly helping either. I closed my eyes in hope of suppressing the pain but it didn't work properly maybe even made it worse.

When I opened my eyes Bucky took a seat opposite opposite me. His glare burnt holes into my head but I avoided his gaze. "Why?" Was all he simply asked. His tone matched his facial expressions despite that I didn't answer. "Damn it Y/n why did you let him go." He yelled standing up. If he's gonna shout at me why not shout back.

"He needed it alright."

"Do you have any idea how stupid that was?" He yelled. His eyes frantically searched my face for an answer.

"Yes I do Bucky but I just thought that the man deserved to say goodbye to his wife and child before he is locked up for life." I shouted back standing up but standing back...I didn't want to get too close just in case my powers decided they wanted to have a day out.

"Well it was very very stupid...what possessed you to do it?" He asked waving his arms about.

"Well I just thought saying goodbye would help you know put his mind at rest...and in all honesty because I thought if you were in his permission you would want to do the same."

"I wouldn't." Was all Bucky said. My breath practically disappeared as I just stared at him and shook my head. "No...I didn't mean that no that came out wrong." Bucky's stony expression cascaded into a more broken one.

"Seems like you did." I said back. My voice was void of emotion. To be honest it hurt more than the gunshot. Imagine that...the love of your life...one of the people that kept you alive. It hurts.

"We gotta go now." Sam bursted in.

"We'll be there." I stated and Sam made his way back out of the room. "I'm going on the mission...talk to me when you decide I'm worth it." I sneered. I turned around and left him standing there. However to perfect finishing arguement came to mind. I walked backwards and peaked around the corner of the wall. "And James...if I could change the fact that I let him go...I wouldn't." I walked back towards Sam and he looked at me almost sympathetically. "You heard that didn't you?" I asked squinting. I really didn't want that but I suppose it was inevitable. "Just so you know Sam I'm so-"

"No you were right...he'll get caught anyway...he deserves a good bye." Sam admitted. I let out a breathe of relief and otried to suppress possible tears. "You know he didn't mean that right?" He stared into my eyes tears began to flow freely down them. Sam stepped forward an wrapped his arms around my body. "It's alright...I know that would hurt but trust me he didn't mean it." He rested his chin on my head and tightened his grip. This was how I imagined having a sibling was like and it felt...warm...comfortable.

"I know it was wrong." I said into his chest.

"Look." He grabbed the sides of my face and pulled away from the hug. "I would have done the same thing...I was just mad because I thought the Dora Milaje would have arrested you too...and that's why Bucky was so mad ." Sam assured.