Stutter

Can't Do This Anymore

The next day at school, I avoided Ashton like the Bubonic Plague, but I had to face him in English. He tried writing me notes like we always do, but I promptly ignored him and was happy when we got a surprise test because that means no talking.

After I handed in my test, I went to get a drink of water so I could get a small breather. It didn't last long when I saw Ashton heading towards me. Instead of running back to class so that he couldn't talk to me, I met him half way and spoke before he could.

"Sorry for dissapointing you, but I'm done," I said. "If you listen to your ex before you even think to consider your current girlfriends' side of the story, then this isn't going to work like I would have liked, so goodbye, Ashton," I said walking off back to class.

The moment I walked in, the bell rang, so I quickly grabbed my bag and left class just as Ashton walked in. I refused to look at him, but he grabbed my elbow, but I kept my face down. I don't know if it was just that he didn't know what to say or how to form it, but nothing ever left his lips. I pulled my elbow out of his grip and left.

I felt a tear slip down my cheek, so I wiped it away quickly not wanting to show the entire school my weakness. I went to the library for lunch, staying clear of the cafeteria, staying clear of everyone. I just cant handle today-which basically is everyone.

---------------------------

Over the next week, I stayed clear of the cafeteria and only had to deal with Ashton during English and every day he tried to talk to me, but I promptly ignored him. I talked to the other guys, everyone but Michael tried to get me to talk to Ashton, but I still refused. I didnt need to talk to him, he made his choice and I made mine, what's done is done.

On Saturday I was overwhelmed by having three rambuncious guys over and two of them tried to convince me to go over there to talk to him.

"Please?" Calum begged.

"No."

"I'll buy you a Penguin!" Luke offered.

"You would steal it later that day."

"I'll buy you food," Mikey added for fun.

"I have food in my kitchen."

"I'll tickle you," Calum threatened.

"I'll bite you."

Finally, they all stopped, as if trying to find another approach. Calum must have found one, because he stood up and stood in front of me, blocking the TV.

"I cant see my show."

"Too bad," He snapped.

That made me look up to see his eyebrows furrowed together.

"Calum?" I asked curiously.

"Shut up a listen," He snapped again.

The authority in his voice made me do as told without arguing.

"Delilah must have done this just to get Ashton back, she went as far as to finding a way to get rid of you. She succedded but only because you let her," He argued.

I opened my mouth to talk, but he pointed a finger at me and gave me a stern look that made me snap my mouth shut.

"Ashton has been broken up over this," He continued. "That day he was just in shock in what Delilah said, he told us that he never, not even a second, beileved you would have hit her. He didnt know what to think, but he didnt think you actually did anything. He's been trying to get your side of the story since the day after everything happened but before he could say anything, you said you were done, what else was he suppose to do?"

The look on his face told me it was a trick question and that I still wasnt aloud to talk. He continued.

"Now, are you going to loose the one guy that's made you this happy just because you're stubborn?" He asked me. "Or are you going to let Delilah win?"

Ok, he had a point, and I, at least should have a chance to explain everything. If Calum is lying and he did expect me in doing what Delilah said than I'm still done, if not we'll talk some more.

I got up and Calum stood in my way, giving me a confused look. He opened his mouth to talk, but I pushed him down in my spot on the couch and left the house quickly and ran down the street to Ashtons.

The moment I got there, I was pleased to find his mother was gone and that we could talk in private. I knocked on the door and waited a moment for Ashton to answer the door. When he did, his eyes widened to the size of Saturn and his jaw dropped slightly.

I pushed myself past him and stood with my arms crossed over my chest. It took him a moment to process what just happened and he finally slowly turned around and shut the door.

"No talking, just listening," I said hurriedly.

I went on explaining what happened that day in the bathroom with Delilah and what she had said to me about their relationship. He stood quitly with his eyes slightly widening the longer I spoke, using little breath because I just wanted to be done with this all.

When I was done, Ashton stood there speechless. Before I could process what was happening, he ran towards me and wrapped his arms around me, hugging me very tightly.