August 5th: Love Square (post reveal)

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Aug 5: Life Post Hawkmoth reveal/arrest

AU in which adrien is distraught by his father being hawkmoth. Marinette desperately tries to console him but the lack of familiarity in comfort that adrien has experienced leaves him wishing to be alone.
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Adrien's phone chimed for the 4th time. Unlike normal he did not have to worry that Nathalie or his father would complain about the annoying noise of his phone ringing. Unlike normal he did not have to worry that his phone calls with friends would be interrupted for som last-minute photoshoot. Unlike normal, he wouldn't be interrupted at all.

Burying his head in his pillows, he reached out for his phone; mistakenly playing the array of left voicemails.

"Dude, I'm bummed out on your behalf. I don't wanna make this too long cause I'm sure you're finding some way to stay optimistic like ya always do! Just letting you know to stay strong and to reach out in case you need. Bro's gotta look out for one another, ok dude."

It felt strange to Adrien, words from his best friend would've normally uplifted him so the current situation, with him laying defeated and face-down to his pillow, made an uneasy feeling arise. He though it was something he had eaten, or the lack of such. Since the event he had resented any form of food pushed his way hence the queasy feeling bubbling up to the surface.

The blond had been used to the idea of solitude, as much as he resented it he still found a way to cope. Maybe he needed more motivation, desiring to find some reason to get out of bed he continued to play the string of left messages.

"Hey Adrien, with everything that's happened Marcov and I decided you should be 72% happier with a healthy dose of jok-"

skipped.

"Sup adrien, Ondine and I are heading to the pool if you wanna come. It'll be-"

skipped.

"Unicorns have a saying that even when it's raining it only takes one ray of sunshine for a rainbow to-"

skipped.

He friends usual chirpiness didn't improve his mood whatsoever. If anything he felt more alone. He could hear the cheerfulness in all of his friends but when he searched for his own he came out empty handed. The event had broken him and as the continuation of unpaused messages echoed out of his phone he wished for nothing more than solitude, silence and serenity. The spark inside him had faded, maybe even snuffed out.

He threw the ruffled covers over himself and buried the tangled mess of hair that sat on his head even further under the cotton pillows; desiring to cry but without the energy to follow through with the notion.

"Hey kitty,"

He sat up at the sound of his alter-ego's nickname, scanning for his lady -the only person who called him such-. When his met the screen of his phone he saw marinette, the only person who had sent a video message and ironically, the last person he wanted to see.

Even since discovering his father was hawkmoth she had been non-stop in her attempts to uplift him. Offering to take him on dates and showering him up an endless mountain of handmade gifts. It hurt himself to know he cared for none of it, that all he could see was that she was motivated and he wasn't. Why wasn't as upset as he was, why couldn't she just leave him alone. Leave him alone like he always was when he was upset, or furious, or abandoned.

"We haven't talked in a while. By a while I mean two months...heh. Adrien, I'm worried about you, you're never this quiet. Not even with me."

She didn't have the right to say he was never this quiet. She didn't have the right to say that he was ignoring people or isolating himself because she didn't understand how he felt. He understands that for himself now, no-one can empathise with him or console him because there's no-one who knows how to. Not even himself. He just wanted to be alone, where he could figure things out for himself, where he wouldn't have to burden anyone else while they constantly made an effort to cheer him up.

a wasted effort he pitifully remarked to himself.

"Your father being Hawkmoth makes you confused, I get that and I get you feel really alone. But it's ok! That's normal and I'm here for you, and to prove to you that I'm not going to abandon you like he did Im going to come over!"

No. he didn't want that, that's the last thing he wanted. He didn't deserve to see her smiling face looking down at him, a face filled with pity and sorrow.

Leaping out of bed to call her, he grabbed onto his phone and hit the dial button. She picked up almost instantly. "Chat! You're calling me," her joyous voice taunted him while she continued to talk "oh, I'm so glad you're wanting to talk. I've prepared some croissants and all other baked pastries to make you feel better, now that you don't have any photoshoots it doesn't matter if we indulge more than norma-"

"Dont come over." His voice blunt and apathetic.

She was quick to respond. "Don't be silly, I'm on my way right Meow~".

The pun hurt him more than she would have ever comprehended, that strange feeling bubbling up inside him once again he spoke "I said don't come over."

"But-"

"LEAVE! LEAVE ME ALONE. I DON'T WANT TO SEE ANYONE RIGHT NOW, ESPECIALLY YOU!" His voice frightening and almost antagonistic she fell silent for a moment.

He could here the hurt in her next words and he didn't care, he just wanted solitude and isolation. "Kitty, this is just-"

"Ladybug," He knew the absence of his loving nickname would sting. "Forget about it, forget about us, forget about me. For a while, for another 2 months at least."

Before hanging up he spat more knives at her "just leave me alone." His finger pressed on the end call button and he sank back down into his bed. Legs spread and face covered in the palms of his hands. He cried, for the first time since the event, and he knew he wasn't going to stop any time soon.

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