Wings and Steel

Chapter II - A Fate Worse than Death

I opened my eyes briefly, but my vision was blurry. My senses felt paralyzed. I heard voices, but I couldn't quite make out what they were saying. Bright lights. Too bright. Movement around me, yet I was unable to move a muscle of my own. Pain. At that moment, I would've given anything to make it go away. Funny, if you asked me now, I would've happily embraced the numbing pain for the reast of my life if it meant I could have avoided the loss I suffered. The ringing in my ears got more and more intense. I closed my eyes once again.

I came to my senses slowly. I shaded my eyes with my arm, as the intense light was too much for me. I was lying on my stomach, which I thought was peculiar. The first thing I noticed was that the pain was gone. The second, was the I.V. dripping steadily. The third was that I had bandages tightly wrapped around my torso. The lack of any trace of blood on the bandages confused me. I tried pushing myself up, but I felt really weak.

I looked around. The room was small and simple. The walls were painted white and there were no windows to be seen. There was not much furniture, apart from a simple hospital room divider in front of my bed and a sink with a mirror above to my left. I almost didn't notice at first the end table on the right side of my bed with a modern-looking lamp on top, currently turned off. Next to it stood a few monitors that were turned off.

I rolled on my left side and threw my legs over the edge of the bed, in an attempt to push myself up. My bare feet touched the cold floor. I stood up straight, only to lose my balance and knock down the i.v. stand. The door opened and a nurse came in. Panic slowly crawled upon her face as she saw me.

"Miss, you are not supposed to get out of bed!" She said as she quickly scurried over to help me regain my balance.

"What happened?" I asked, slightly surprised by the hoarse sound of my own voice.

"You have been badly injured during your mission. Shot with a long-range acid round, I believe?" She said as she helped me sit on the edge of the bed. "It was the kind that keeps advancing and destroying your tissue, once it hits. You are most lucky to be alive."

Acid? That would explain the excruciating pain I experienced, I thought.

"I am really sorry though." She said looking down.

These simple words sent a shiver down my spine and stuck a knot in my throat.

"What are you sorry for?" I asked hesitantly.

"Oh...nobody told you?" she asked, visibly getting nervous.

I swallowed hard as a foreign feeling creeped its way into my chest.

"What are you sorry for?" I repeated, accentuating every word in a desperate attempt to postpone the moment when reality would came crashing down.

"Y-your wings" She mumbled "They couldn't be saved."

I felt a sharp pain, like a claw, clutch at my chest. I couldn't breathe.

"Miss, are you okay?" I heard as a ringing noise started to take over my hearing. "Wait, stop!" I heard her say as I ripped the needle from my skin and got up.

I felt her grab onto me, but I swiftly pushed her aside, going to the mirror. I struggled for a second to take off the gown, followed by clumsily unwrapping the bandages with shaky hands. After what seemed like for ever, I managed to finally remove all of them. I turned around, scrutinizing my bare back in the mirror.

I froze. Two fresh, gruesome wounds stood in the spot where my wings were supposed to come out of. I tried to move my muscles to unfold my wings. And then I tried it once again. And again. And again. And again. AND AGAIN once more as I felt hot tears burning my cheeks. I couldn't breathe. A fate worse than death.