A Disastrous Life Indeed

3 || 500 Is My New Fav Number||

This - is Saiki's thoughts

"This" - is Saiki using telepathy to others or hearing other's thoughts

"This" - is normal dialogue (but you won't really see Saiki actually speaking that much)

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It had been quite a while since Saiki woke up in this weird dimension. Thankfully, he was still in Japan, and most things seemed normal at the moment. Humans still looked human, society continued normally, and no more monsters showed up. But he had been walking and walking until he could feel his legs no more. Saiki had tried his best to not stand out, so levitating wasnt a good idea either. He had nothing else he could do, but to walk and observe his surroundings.

Saiki was now in a pretty empty area of the city. It was scary, especially since the sun was setting, but that meant less eyes staring at him. 

I think i might actually have to sleep on the streets, and i hate that.

He looked around, seeing if there was a good, isolated, not-disgusting-looking area. That was when a glint caught his eye. 

A coin.

It lay there, all alone, and so temptingly. Without a moment to lose, Saiki immediately teleported next to what was soon going to be exchanged for his dinner. Finally. After who knows how many hours since losing his coffee jelly in front of his eyes.

Saiki held back a cry of joy as he pinched up a...500 yen! Yes! His eyes scanned the buildings around him like an eagle searching for its prey. Not far off, he saw what seemed to be a small general store. 

He walked in to the dimly lit store and immediately looked for cup ramen. He could ask the store lady for some hot water. Saiki had lost his mind -- up until the point where he was willing to socialise with people, and ask them for things. 

He scanned the room hungrily, but stopped when his eyes layed upon...a bald head.

Pft. It's an egg buying some eggs.

I apologise on his behalf. As said earlier, he has gone a little coo-coo from all the things that has happened to him today; please understand.

Oi.

The bald man had been inspecting some eggs. After picking a carton, he turned around to see bright pink hair.

"Ah. You. We see each other often, huh?" He laughed, with the same smile he had when staring up at the giant humanoid creature earlier that day.

"Do you know where the cup ramen are?"

"Hm? Oh, they're there." The man pointed to a section of the small store with the ramen.

"Oh my god."  Saiki wobbled over and grabbed the biggest one he could find. 190 yen. Perfect. He could buy two.

Might as well ask this dude for hot water.

~~~~~

"Oh, sure." He said. Saiki was surprised by the mans easy decision. But then again, it was only a bit of water.

The two walked out of the store after paying for their goods, and an awkward silence settled in as Saiki followed the bald-man. After letting out an obvious fake cough, the man spoke up.

"So- uh, it was Saiki, wasnt it? I realised i havent told you my name, it's Saitama."

"Yes. Thank you, Saitama." 

"No problem. By the way, how do you do that? Talking into my head? You can fly, turn invisible AND talk into people's heads - that's cool." 

Saiki paused. Now that he thought about it, he hadnt been in many situations where he had to explain: "Oh, im a psychic, thats why i can do cool stuff."  

...

"Oh, im a psychic, that's why i can do cool stuff." 

 "Ehhhh? Those spoon-bending people? Damn... ... ...oh, a cat." The man knelt down to pat a kitten which had been sitting on the side of the road. It hurried away, leaving him awkwardly sticking his hand out.

"Aw...why did it-"

His words were cut short by a chunk of metal whizzing past his head, almost hitting him. More bits and pieces rolled out, crushing the eggs which had been put on the ground.

"Ah...that sucks." Saiki looked up to see...a car. Yes. A literal car with legs.

"Vroom, vroom?" It said, realising the presence of the two.

Did this thing just say 'vroom, vroom'? Oh my lord - it wasnt even an attempted imitation of an engine. It just said vRoOm vrOoM.

Saitama sighed, looking up at the monster. Although Saiki didnt know much about emotion, he could tell it was a sad one.

"Is something wrong?" Saiki asked, confused. Why would one look up at a car with legs and sigh sadly?

"Hm...nothing much. It's just that...lately, i feel as though my emotions are becoming more distant. Fear, tension, joy, anger...i dont feel anything anymore."

Saiki nodded slightly, listening to the man. But...

Uhm. This dude's just talking over the monster. 

This whole time, the car monster had been talking to them. Threatening, bluffing, etc, etc. Saitama was just explaining his problems and completely ignoring it.

"...I think...in exchange for power, maybe ive lost something that's essential for a human being?"

That sentence made Saiki pause. His eyes slightly widened, thinking about what the man had just said.

It was weird, hearing that coming from another person's mouth. He had found a man going through the same as he was.

...interesting. This Saitama dud-

"If you guys are going to be in my way, im gonna kill you both-"

Saiki forcibly shut the things's mouth, not wanting to hear any more of the annoying voice. He definitely wasnt in the mood to deal with irritating things at the moment, mainly because of all the shitty things which had happened to him that day.

The car monster flinched back, in slight shock, then his eyes glowed yellow with fury. His eyes were the headlights, so it literally shone yellow.

Then, Saitama took over, smashing the car into pieces. It was disgusting because the monster still had flesh, apparently.

"Why was it so damn loud? I was in the middle of a speech." He said, looking annoyed.

"Damn it. I wanted to get rid of it. Next time, let me try." Saiki said, scrunching up his nose in annoyance as well. Maybe a little disgust too. 

The two were getting along pretty well, whether they were aware of it or not.

Smirking at Saiki's remark, Saitama continued to head home. 

...

"I guess ill be having egg over rice tonight."

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