what i never talked about

April 15, 1912 | 02.20 am.

– someone grabbed my arm and pulled me on my feet. It was Jack. "Kathy, get up. You're not going to die today. Come on!"

I jumped on my feet and Jack, Rose and I ran to the back of the ship as fast as we could, or as fast as it was allowed to us, since still way too many people were on the ship. We pushed our way through them when we finally arrived at the railing from the stern side. I held onto the railing as tight as I was physically able to. Jack and Rose held onto each other and the railing, they were standing so close nothing could have fit between their bodies. While Rose was being nostalgic about how her and my brother first met, I was a little distracted by the fact the ship was about to float on the water like a cork.

"Uhm, guys, I really don't want to disturb your nostalgic moment, but I think we're not longer able to hold on to the railing like that", I said loud and got their attention.

Jack mumbled a fast "shit" and pulled Rose on top of the railing before helping me and then himself onto it.

"Just sit still and hold on", Jack said. "It'll all be okay."

I gripped tighter onto the railing, as the ship stood vertical for a few seconds. It felt like I was sitting on the ship's back for minutes and minutes when it finally started to go down.

Jack looked at me, telling me, that I should do what he says and trust him. He knows that I trust with everything he's doing so he didn't even wait for a response. The ship was going down, faster and faster each second.

"Rose, Kathy, breathe in as much air as you can when I tell you, try to swim to the surface as fast as you can. Just wait. Wait. Wait."

Every second I felt my face hitting the water, every second I felt myself being pulled stream. "JACK!", I screamed.

"Hold on! Any second now." And not even a second later he yelled: "NOW!"

I breathed in as deep as I could and held my breath when I eventually was dragged down by the stream. The freezing water felt like a thousand knives stabbing me, filling my ears and my eyes, soaking my clothes and my hair. I fought. I kicked the water aside with my legs and shoved it behind me with my arms and hands. Always faster and harder until I felt release from the stream and finally broke the water surface with my head.

I was gasping for air, screaming Jack's and Rose's names as loud as I could, my throat going totally sore from the screaming and the freezing air.

"KATHY! KATHY!", I heard someone screaming in the distance. My instincts made me swim to the direction I believed the screams were coming from. I was swimming as fast as I could finally spotting someone who looked a lot like my brother. "Jack", I sighed to myself.

I reached my hand to grab his. When I finally got to grab him, he pulled me with him to a wooden piece which was floating on the water. Rose was already laying on it.

"Get on it", Jack said.

I nodded when I realized. "Wait, what about you?"

"It's fine, K. Just get on."

"No."

"Please. Kathy, I need you to survive this. I need you to get out of here alive."

"And I need you."

"Katheryn Dawson, get on it. Now."

He said it in his tone, which allowed no backtalking. I indulged and pulled my self onto the wooden piece next to Rose. We both were facing Jack, each of us holding on to one of his hands.

A few minutes nobody said something, when Jack eventually said something. "The boats will come back to get us."

We nodded, holding on tighter onto Jack's hand. "Jack?"

"Yeah?"

"You remember when we broke into lake Wissota?"

"Of course I do", he smiled.

"It also took dad a few minutes to get us out of the water. I'll just be like that now", I said tired.

"Kathy, please, stay awake", he said with a trembling voice. "Don't give up."

"I won't. I promise, just let me close my eyes."

"Kathy, don't. You need to stay awake; you need to survive this."

"I will, Jack, I will", I said and yawned. "I love you, big brother."

"I love you too, little sister."