Lonely Hearts Won't Break

FOURTEEN｜CONFESSIONS

The room was annoyingly silent, minus the shuffling of manilla folders and freshly printed papers that stunk of hot ink. It was also uncomfortably cold. I realized that outside this quite old and raggedy ass building the temperature was cranked up to hell, but damn, there was no reason maintenance had everyone's bones chilled to icicles. To make matters worse, I was tired and tired meant being annoyed by almost anything that fell out of alignment with the plans I had set for today. Beginning with this delayed meeting.

It was originally scheduled for next Wednesday during a slot that both Layla and I's lawyers were available. That all changed rather last minute when little Ms. Madison here, our badly tanned mediator who is clearly OCD, contacted us both stating we needed to reschedule for this week since she had arranged a - and I quote her directly - mental health getaway that our meeting conflicted with; our meeting scheduled two weeks in advance. I understood the purpose of it, and bitterly acknowledged her privilege because black folks could never, but that didn't curb the fact that it was an inconvenience. I hated inconveniences and honestly, her too.

Alright, hate might be an exaggeration. So, I'll renege, rephrase and say I didn't particularly care for the woman. She was cordial most of the time but I noticed she wasn't always neutral when it came to certain concerns despite her job title. How could I blame her though? Layla withheld the truth in some of our conversations until her lawyer would coerce her not to. Even when she did choose to be frank about our issues, most times if not all, Madison sided with Layla's perspective making it difficult for me to not switch up and run straight to a judge like I promised I wouldn't. The only buffer I had was my lawyer and thanks to him, we were making some progress. However, today he was not here, neither was Layla's representation and I was certain this would be a shit show.

All the sign I needed was the sudden chill that pierced my spine, the shit felt like it was severing it in half, it was so bad. My body convulsed, and now I couldn't decipher if I was morphing into an anxious wreck, unusual for me, or dying of hypothermia. I'll take hypothermia for $500, Alex, if it would get me out of this office sooner.

I shifted in my seat, rubbing my palms over my arms, thawing out every inch as much as I could and sighed.

Time was ticking on, five minutes turning into another five of Layla and I waiting not so patiently for Madison to gather herself. For a moment I swore the woman forgot we were even present, and Layla must've been holding the same train of thought when she squinted over at me, resting her chin on her knuckles and mouthed 'what the fuck?'.

I shrugged then glanced down at the screen of my phone that lit up just as it vibrated in my lap. Internally I was chuckling at how quick I snatched it up and tapped in my code.

The smile that stained my face like a permanent tattoo, and probably had me looking like a smitten fool, was immediate. I was greeted with such a Tatum message or rather video of her riding her bike down the East River Greenway, curls pinned up in a messy bun and sun gleaming down on her face glowing with sweat and perfection. With her right hand on its corresponding handlebar, she adjusted the AirPod in her left ear then casually flipped her middle into the camera lens blabbering, "That's for thinking you could ever dust me on a bike! My speed, you hear that wind? Its saying different. Eat my dust, negro!" The boisterous laugh that fought to break her "menacing" façade but indeed spilled over after her smart remarks ended was infectious, and just like all my other reactions during this entire exchange I was replying back, urgent as fuck. Trying to do so while shivering and twisting in my seat so I could avoid Layla from seeing my messages had me fumbling my phone like Brett Farve.

"Damn," I gritted, catching the device before it hit the floor, and who knew the entire scenario is what finally garnered Madison's attention. She took a sip of her Starbuck's pink drink and expelled her pleasure thanks to its taste before folding her hands over her notebook and smiling.