New Romantics | Chris Chambers

007- forest fun

We were sitting around the fire roasting our food laughing and talking. Our sleeping bags were behind us and I sat next to Chris. Obviously. My head leaning on his shoulder giving my stomach a funny feeling.

"Vern, you better turn yours over." Chris told Vern seeing as it was about to fall off the stick.

"It's the way I'd like to do it." Vern stated triumphantly.

"Fine." Chris said shaking his head. God he looked good in the firelight. Wait hold up, no. Just friends. Vern's food then dropped into the fire.

"Oh man! You got any more, Gordie?" Vern cried.

"Sorry, Vern." Gordie replied holding in a laugh.

"It's not funny, what am I supposed to eat?" Vern complained crossing his arms.

"Why don't you eat your dick?" Teddy said removing his food from the fire.

"It would be a small meal." I added causing everyone but Vern to laugh. He was trying to get his food back on the stick. He had succeeded.

"Screw you guys I got it!"

After we ate Chris pulled out the cigarettes that he stole from his dad.

"Nothing like a smoke after meal." Vern sighed leaning back.

"Yeah. I cherish these moments" Teddy said blowing smoke out of his mouth. Chris and I just laughed. "What? What did I say?"

"Hey, Gordoe, why don't you tell us a story?" Chris asked turning to Gordie .

"I - I don't know." Gordie stuttered shaking his head.

"Oh come on." I pleaded. I had heard Gordie tell a story once about a month ago about a sergeant and leathernecks. I had to admit he was great at writing and I loved reading so we kind of bonded over that.

"Yeah, come on, Gordoe. But not one of your horror stories, okay? I don't wanna hear no horror stories. I'm not up for that, man." Vern added his voice getting shaky at the end.

"Why don't you tell us one about Sergeant Stone and his battling leathernecks? Teddy requested.

"Well the one I've been thinking about is kind of different. It's about this pie-eating contest. And the main guy of the story is a fat kid that nobody likes named Davie Hogan." Gordie started.

"Like Charlie Hogan's brother. If he had one." Vern interrupted.

"Good Vern." Chris said sarcastically "Go on, Gordie."

"Well this kid is our age but he's fat, real fat. He weighs close to one-eighty. But you know it's not his fault it's his glands." Gordie explained.

"Oh yeah, my cousin's like that, sincerely. She weighs over three hundred pounds. Supposed to be Hyboid Glands or something. Well I don't know about any Hyboid Glands, but what a blimp. No shit she looks like a Thanksgiving turkey. And you know this one time --" Vern interrupted yet again.

"Shut up, Vern." Chris said agitated giving him a death stare.

"Yeah, yeah, right. Go on, Gordie, it's a swell story." Vern replied sympathetically. I placed my head in Chris's lap as Gordie started actually getting to the story. He occasionally would look down at me and smile and I smiled back. I had to admit I've liked him for a while but never thought it would go anywhere so I've been ignoring the feeling.

"Well all the kids instead of calling him Davie they call him Lardass. Lardass Hogan. Even his little brother and sister call him Lardass. A-at school they put a sticker on his back that says 'wide load', and they rank him out and beat him up whenever they got a chance. But one day he gets an idea. The greatest revenge-idea a kid ever had..."

The story came to and end and we all cheered.

"Now that was the best, just the best." Chris exclaimed blowing out smoke.

"Yeah." I said agreeing.

"What happened?" Teddy immediately asked.

"What do you mean?" Gordie said confused.

"I mean, what happened?" Teddy urged.

"What do you mean what happened, that's the end." Gordie stated.

"How can that be the end, what kind of an ending is that? What happened to Lardass?" Teddy complained.

"I don't know. Maybe he went home and celebrated with a couple of cheeseburgers." Gordie shrugged.

"Jeez. That sucks. Why don't you make it so that Lardass goes home, and he shoots his father. And he runs away. And - and he joins the Texas- Rangers. How about that?" Teddy suggested.

"I - I don't know." Gordie stammered.

"Something good like that." Teddy said .

"I like the ending. The barfing was really good. But there is one thing I didn't understand. Did Lardass have to pay to get into the contest?" Vern asked.

"No, Vern, they just let him in." Gordie replied.

"Oh! Oh great. Great story." Vern said smiling.

"Yeah it's a good story, Gordie, I just don't like the ending." Teddy sighed. We sat in silence for a moment. He moved my hair out of my face and spoke.

"Hey, Verno, where's the radio, let's see if we can get some sounds."

We began talking about many things like our favourite food or cartoons on tv.

"Alright, alright. Mickey's a mouse. Donald's a duck. Pluto's a dog. What's Goofy?" Gordie asked.

"Goofy's a dog, he's definitely a dog." I answered.

"He can't be a dog. Wears a hat and drives a car." Chris stated matter of factly.

"God, that's weird. What the hell is Goofy?" Vern said thinking.

"If I can only have one food for the rest of my life? That's easy. Pez. Cherry flavoured Pez. No question about it." Vern told us.

"Wagon Train's a really cool show. But did you ever notice that they never get anywhere? They just keep wagon training." Gordie said confused.

"Did you know that Chris has a crush and won't tell his best friends. Come on Chris your secrets safe with us" Teddy said smirking.

"No, man I don't have one alright" Chris said sounding annoyed.

"Sure Chris keep telling yourself that" Teddy continued. I looked at Chris and he was staring of in the distance thinking. Jesus he's cute when he's thinking. Wait. I thought I pushed these thoughts away. Stop it.