This is Real

Needs

Shay gripped her hands through her hair, adamant at forgetting the images in her head, but they were incessant. She pursed her lips, because no matter how hard she tried, they still came unbidden to the forefront of her mind.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shay looked up at the knock on her trailer. She was on break for a few hours yet and she didn't know many people who would look for her at this time. They all usually took a bit of time to get into their roles. Sometimes she just sleeps, of course, but whenever she was set to do a really heavy scene, she usually takes the time to actually internalize it. When she did the scene where she shot a guy, she had to look deep in herself to get in touch with her emotions. She didn't really have any kind of experience to draw from so sometimes it needed to be done.

Nevertheless, she stood up from her comfortable perch on her couch and opened the door to her trailer. She smiled when she saw Sasha, who smiled back halfheartedly. Shay waited until they were both seated before she asked the blonde what was up.

"Ian asked me to be his girlfriend again."

Taken aback, Shay raised her eyebrows. It was through sheer will power that she didn't show how shocked she was, how hurt she was at the lack of a negative reaction from Sasha and how she didn't really want to hear about this particular aspect of Sasha's life. She was ever the best friend anyone could have, though, and she nodded her head in what she hoped was understanding.

"And what did you say?" Shay was just thankful that her voice came out neutral.

"I said yes."

Shay couldn't help the frown that took over her features. She was sure she should be impartial about this, talk to Sasha about processing her feelings. But all she could do was look at her close friend, practically her best friend, whose eyes refused to meet hers for reasons she didn't quite know, yet. "Sasha-"

 "But I'm confused."

Shay shook her head. "You must have already thought about this a long time before coming to see me. You can't be that confused anymore."

Shay regretted her tone, rough and almost accusing but she didn't take her words back. She didn't think this was a smart move on Sasha's part, and by how much the younger girl was avoiding her eyes, Shay assumed Sasha was aware of that.

Despite Shay's tone, however, Sasha didn't look like she even registered it. When she looked up at Shay, Sasha's eyes were wrought with uncertainty, but there was a vehemence that took Shay by surprise.

"I need to know something." Sasha's voice quivered, but it was stronger than when she told Shay about her new boyfriend.

"What-?"

"I need you to kiss me."

Shay's eyebrows rose so high, and her heart had seemingly stopped beating, she didn't realize she'd frozen until Sasha was only an inch from her face. She hadn't moved away because she couldn't even register that Sasha had moved. But Sasha's scent immediately took over her senses. Those deep blue eyes were now so close she could see the light colored eyelashes that framed them. Everything threatened to drown her senses, to dampen everything else. Shay knew nothing else but Sasha at that moment. She knew she needed to stop this, but Sasha's proximity clouded her senses, and all she could think was, "Fuck, this is happening."

When their lips met, Shay moaned out, because she'd been thinking about those lips for weeks, and she'd had to kiss them for the different scenes, but she wanted so much more than just to act like she was in love. Her hands wrapped around Sasha, tight and seeking control, even as she felt that same control start to slip from her fingers.

"Shay..."

Shay opened her mouth to say something, maybe to stop whatever this was before it got out of hand, but soft lips slid from their position over hers to her neck, and she felt wet kisses being planted over her tanned skin. She could do nothing else but tilt her head back.

"Shay..."

Hands started to roam, and Shay shuddered when Sasha's cool hands pressed unto her stomach, only to slide to her back and pull her closer. Her own hands slid up and around Sasha's neck, anchoring herself close to the younger girl. Where was the flirty side of her when she needed it?

"Sasha..."

Shay didn't know what she wanted. But she was sure it was just... more.

"Shay..."

"Sasha..."

"Shay..."

"Shay."

"Shay!"

She woke up to a hand shaking her shoulder and Shay jolted up. She was sure no matter her natural dark skin, the blush on her cheeks was unmistakable.

Sasha grinned at her. "Wow. Was that a sex dream?"

If possible, Shay blushed even more, grabbing one of the small pillows on the couch in her trailer to cover her face with while Sasha laughed at her expense. "No." Her voice was muffled.

Sasha only laughed some more, lifting Shay's legs off the couch so she could also sit, placing Shay's legs over hers. "Let's talk about this. Was he hot?"

He's a she. And she was you. "Shush."

"Aww, come on. We're friends, aren't we?" Sasha tried to pout, but Shay was still behind her pillow. Sasha rolled her eyes, and reached out to uncover Shay's face, which was still a bit red. Sasha pursed her lips to keep her laughter at bay, to which Shay scowled at her for. "I won't laugh! I won't laugh anymore." Sasha arranged her features so she looked neutral. But she still snorted.

Shay groaned, taking the pillow from Sasha's hands and covering her face again.

"Is that a sex sound?"

Sasha laughed again when Shay threw the pillow at her face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shay groaned again now at the memory of the dream and what happened after. Her restraint was fast failing and she didn't know how to deal with her needs. She still didn't quite know how to broach the subject with Sasha.

Shay actually asked Sasha, promptly after she had controlled the blushing, how Sasha and Ian were. Sasha said they were ok, with a nonchalant tone as if she didn't really care to talk about Ian. Shay didn't mind not talking about the guy. They did, instead, decide that they were going to have dinner that Friday just because they hadn't gone out the past week because of their busy schedules. Dinner was either going to be fine dining or takeout Chinese. They decided to wing it depending on their mood on the said day.

Shay bit her lips as she thought about the blonde, knowing she needed to make a move if she wanted to... she wanted to what? Shay sighed as she realized she hasn't even settled on knowing what she actually wanted. Did she want a relationship? Did she want to just see where it would go? Did she want to explore this new part of her sexuality? Was it just going to be a fast fling?

With all these thoughts in her mind, Shay covered her face with her hands. This was going to be complicated. And she knew being under the constant observation of the media was not going to be easy on them. Them? Were they a them now? Shay groaned out again.

She needed to get her thoughts organized before she even attempted to pursue anything.

A/N: This is short and it's a filler chapter and I'm really sorry about the late update but I'm dying from exams and I still have eight more to go through please forgive me I love you all stay with me please :((((((( THANK YOU TO MY REVIEWERS!!
Carlyo99 - I'm sorry it wasn't soon! :(
JackyLittleLiar - This is kind of sort of a kiss? :D But not really.....
Katethe7th - They will be! But not yet. :P
Jordan2240 - I'm so glad you think so!
whatever4life - I'm sorry I took so long! :(