𝗡𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗡𝗼𝘄 🤍

•𝗧𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝗖𝗵𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲•

•🍂•

Nikki's POV, 27th February 2008

I'm so lost right now, honestly like kill me, it'd be easier. Okay. So, long story short, I've had both Mick and Vince on my ass over the last few days, I had Vince going on at me to just face my feelings for Tommy and damn the consequences, it's not that easy, I'm fighting my own brain here so it's more complicated than he's making it out to be.

Mick isn't being as forceful as Vince, because he understands my mental problems a little more with my self esteem, but he still doesn't quite understand just how difficult this actually is for me.

The guitarist wants me to meet up with him at his place to talk today and so I agreed not seeing the harm in it, but agreeing yesterday and actually having to go today and two entirely different problems.

I'm up for listening to him because he'll make valid points but I don't know if I can make myself move on from my way of thinking, I'm a strong willed person and when I've told myself somethings are for the best as many times as I have over my current predicament with Tommy it takes a lot to shift my perception.

But I will say what I'm doing isn't healthy, being tempted to drown your sorrows in gallons of alcohol isn't normal and that something I don't want to do as I've said, and I still think it's an inevitability.

At this exact time I was driving to Mick's, I'd almost reached his place and was dreading the upcoming conversation we were going to have. The rest of the drive went quickly, to be fair to entire journey had taken less time than I'd have like it to have.

I got to Mick's driveway and got out of my car, shutting the door setting my eyes on the guitarists house fighting the urge to just get the fuck outta here, I promised Mick though that I'd come and talk... I can't break a promise to him, he's the dad I never had, so breaking a promise to him would be so wrong to me.

With a little reluctance I stepped up the driveway and to the front door, where I placed a series of knocks onto the wood and waited, shifting a little anxiously foot to foot unable to stay still.

The door eventually opened after a couple of minutes, Mick met my eyes and nodded "Nikki, glad you didn't pussy out on me"

I forced a smile "Would I do that to you?"

"Yes" he deadpanned and I rolled my eyes which did make the older man's lips crack into a smile "Get your ass in here"

I entered the house and looked around "Every time I come here this place looks more of more like the lair of Count Dracula"

"You can talk, you're house is a black as your fucking soul"

"That's not true" I defended.

"It fucking well is" Mick grumbles as he closed the door "At least when you lived with Tommy he forced you to buy colours other than black or the darkest shade of grey"

"It's not my fault I like a dark colour palette"

"Then it ain't my fault either, don't make me out to be the vampire here, you're on the same level as me"

"Are we actually gonna argue about this?" I wondered.

Mick shrugged "Hell, probably so we should probably shut up before it gets to that point, arguing with you is a losing game, you never admit defeat"