(don't read this if you are sensitive about your body)
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Binge-watching your show for about an hour, you felt a churn in your stomach as it made a small noise.
You groaned and paused the show as you placed your hand on my stomach, rubbing it smoothly.
You were definitely hungry because you hadn't eaten anything in the morning and now it was late evening.
You stood up from the couch and walked towards the kitchen as you searched for food. As you did, you placed it in the microwave and waited for about two minutes before it dinged.
You smiled proudly and felt the delicious smell go through your nostrils as you practically moaned at the food you were looking at.
You sat back down and ate the food deliciously as you felt the flavour mix in with your tongue. You then resumed the show and ate peacefully.
Out of nowhere, you thought about your mother's words when she caught you eating at four a.m. in the morning.
"Stop eating, Y/N! You're getting too fat!" She yelled and you lowered down your head and the fork you were holding.
"I'm sorry, Mom." You mumbled, feeling the brim of your eyes to form tears as you tried your hardest not to cry.
You didn't want to feel like a baby around your mother. But the words she said hurt you even more.
"Go, I don't wanna ever see your face!" She pointed at the door and sighed. You bit the inside of your cheek to prevent crying as you walked your way out.
Remembering all that, you suddenly stopped chewing and lowered down the bowl. You stood up and shut the TV down, heading to the kitchen again to throw out the food you were eating.
You felt disgusted. You pursed your lips into a line and headed upstairs as you grabbed your phone.
Closing your bedroom door, you walked into your washroom and turned on the lights, revealing your chubby self as you were a kid.
You questioned yourself almost every day as to why your boyfriend was dating you. He was the superstar in the NHL and had his name all over but you, you were just different.
You had called yourself names every day when you grew up with skinny family members so you could feel the pain go through your body to realize how it felt. And you felt it and you became numb every single day. Of course, Leon noticed it but you told him every lies that came into your mind and he had no idea that you went through it because you didn't think to have the nerve to do it. You were basically scared of Leon running away from you because he was your first boyfriend and still is.
You quivered your chin and placed both hands on your stomach to spread the fat from behind but failed.
You felt a tear slipped as you sobbed onto your hands, looking away from the large mirror.
"Why can't I be skinny?" You whimpered and sobbed uncontrollably until you got over it.
You sniffled and sat on the toilet seat as you thought about Leon and your life especially. You were basically overweight and hated every part of your body.
"Baby, I'm back!"
Your eyes widened and quickly sniffled as you instantly wiped the tears under your eyes and on your cheeks.
You stood up and closed the lights as you walked to your bed. You sat and didn't realize that your face was puffy and red.
When Leon came into the room, you plastered on a fake smile and hugged him tightly.
"Hey, babe." He said of his soft tone as he kissed your cheek and you felt like you wanted to drop to your knees and sob all you want but you kept it in as you pulled away.
"Hi. Did anything happen new?" You told him and cursed under your breath when your voice cracked.
Leon slightly frowned. "Nope, I just missed you." He smiled brightly and wrapped his arm around your neck as he pulled you in.
You smiled sweetly and looked over to your side as you felt your eyes suffered behind. You wanted to sob so bad.
"Are you ok?" Shit. He noticed it.
You frowned and pursed your lips as you shook your head. He raised his eyebrow and squinted his eyes at you questionably.
"What's going on, Y/N?" He asked you and saw his face plastered with hurt.
"It's nothing, Leon. It's nothing important." You declaimed and shrugged your shoulders.
"It is when you're my girlfriend." He exclaimed and you sighed, looking over to your shoulder to avoid eye contact. "Look at me, what's going on?" He softened his tone and you wanted to kiss him up so badly. He was being so sweet and you did nothing but ignore him.
"I can't tell you, babe. I'm scared." You whimpered and stood up from his grip.
"Are you pregnant?" He asked you and you quickly shook your head with a chuckle.
"No! Leon, it's so stupid. I'm literally crying over something dumb." You scoffed and stopped as you realized what you said.
"You were crying?" He raised his forehead in confusion. You exhaled sharply and nodded, earning a sigh from him. "Baby, why were you crying?" He stood up and walked over to you, placing his finger under your chin to look at him.
You quivered your chin, "I hate being fat. Look at my body! I'm fat! My thighs, my stomach, my face, everywhere!" You rambled on and he cut you off as he pulled you into a tight hug where you finally sobbed.
"Don't, baby. It's ok. It's fine." He smoothed your back and whispered to you sweetly.
You kept sobbing and sobbing until you got over it and when you felt a wet pool on his shoulder, you instantly regret it.
"Oh, I'm sorry." Your voice cracked and slightly pulled away so you could breathe.
He smiled at you and shrugged. "It's fine, it doesn't matter." When you looked directly at his eyes, you saw nothing but passion and love sparkling.
"Leon." You breathed out and sniffled.
"Who did this to you?" He said and you bit the inside of your cheek.
"My mom, especially." You replied and he exhaled heavily, grabbing onto you tightly as he was never going to let you go.
"Don't let her get to you, baby. It's fine. You've been beautiful ever since I saw you." He smiled sweetly and pecked his lips on your forehead.
You swallowed hard. "You don't understand, Leon. I've been bullied all my life because of my parents. They put me through this." Ever since you found out that your parents have been talking behind your back and tried to forced you to lose weight, you did nothing but hate on them.
You couldn't believe them that they put you through everything crap so you moved out and later met Leon where you felt a bit more insecure about yourself.
"Don't worry, Y/N. We'll get everything under control." He nodded to make sure and you smiled at him.
"I love you." You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him towards you.
He chuckled. "I love you more, baby. Don't forget that. I will always treat you like a queen you are until we die together." Then, he found his hands through my waist as he tightened the hold around.
You raised your eyebrow at him and gave him an 'are-you-sure-?' look. "You can't keep that promise. What if we break up?" You asked him and he quickly shook his head.
"I'll make sure that won't happen." He gave you his smugly smile and you chuckled before deepening into his hug again.
