Forever and Always

Loss and Renewal

He never did wake up. And I knew that if I tried to bring him back, he might hate me. But I couldn't find it in myself to live without him. So I did the rational thing. I took a revival potion and promptly threw myself from the astronomy tower. I'm sure most would assume I did it to be with Severus and they would be only half right.

I also did it so no one would look for us when we did come back. I left a letter for Minerva that went along the lines of "I'm dead but I'm not. I'm going in to retrieve him and I'll need to get out of anywhere we are buried. Also, I left you revival portions for Sirius, Remus and Tonks. Should you need my help again afterwards, owl me. Myself and Severus will be finding a new place, away from Spinners End because he needs to resolve his assets. I, however, made previsions. The owl I left you knows where we'll be. Thank you Minerva"

When I 'wake' I am near the tree. Not the willow but the tree where Severe and Lily used to meet. There he was, watching Lily and James. I creep up behind him and place a hand on his shoulder. He flinches and looks back at me. "I've lost her forever, haven't I?" I shake my head. "Of course not. She will always be a part of you." I point to his heart. "Here. But she doesn't have to consume you. She made her choices and you made yours. What's done is done." I take his hands and step in front of him. "You have me now. What's great is that I will never choose someone else's life over yours. You are my only true love and I need you to come back with me."

He turns back to Lily and James. "Can't I at least talk to her?" I bite my lip but nod. "Yes of course. Let me know what you choose. I'll be near the bridge." I turn and walk away and it hurts but I know he needs to hear it from her. Its nearly time for them to meet Harry before his death. I hope we don't keep them too long.

I sit under the bridge and rest my head on my knees. I give into the pain. The thought that maybe he won't come back. Maybe he will stay with her. And if he does, I will have to go back and live with it. Live without him. I never planned for if he wouldn't go with me but it was always a possibility. I hear something. It sounds familiar.

"Darling girl, why are you crying?" Above me stands Sirius Black. I wipe my face. "Honestly hadn't realized I was. But if I you were to guess, what would you say?" He sits beside me and glances at the scene by the tree. "I'd say your in love with someone. I'd say you don't know weather its a life with you or a death with her he'll chose. But then I'd ask for which one your heart aches." I sigh and look at the water. "Take a wild guess. I didn't come here before Harry's birth. When he was 14 is when I arrived. I wouldn't of known James by that point."

He stiffens. "Severus then." I nod. "I came to this particular dimension to save a single life. Along the way I've saved 5, as of yourself. But Minerva is still giving you the choice. Should you wish to return, it will happen. But you won't be able to tell anyone but those like yourself. Meaning myself, Remus, Tonks, Fred, and, if he chooses, Severus." I know he's puzzled.

"How on Earth is that possible? Death is meant to be final." I shake my head. "We haven't got much time to talk. We'll wake in the same tomb. But for now, you have to go to Harry and convince him to die. Compare it to sleep. And take the others he cares for with you. Now." He stands and disappears. I know Lily and James have as well.

I stand and dry the rest of my tears before walking to where he stands, staring at the water. "What did she say?" He doesn't look at me. "She said I should go back. Live my life with someone that loves me like James and her love each other." I turn him to face me. "That means you told her everything from before, about me and you. Anything else?" He stares coldly for a moment. "I told her that I was in love again. That while she had a place in my heart, it now burns for another." I open and close my mouth and then look at the ground. "Then when we leave, I'll make sure the two of you can be happy together. Just tell me who." He shocks me with a kiss. "You're unbelievably dense sometimes, did you know that?" I cringe. "It's been said before."

He closes his eyes and puts our foreheads together. "I was talking about you. Its you my heart burns for." I stand there breathless and speechless. "Have I rendered you incapable of words?" I nod and blush. "I have everything planned. Of course, you would have to deal with certain people coming back." He raises an eyebrow. "Sirius, Remus, Tonks and Fred. I have some obliviating to do though. Will you help me?" He hold my face in his hand and I place my hands on his chest. "I will be there for you no matter what." I know he means it but I have to ask.

I look into his eyes. "Forever?" He sounds so at ease. "Always."