Feel your heartbeat

What can I do, Christian?

.

"What do you mean by that?" he heard Ana say, while breaking eye contact.

However, Christian refused to give her an explanation, afraid that Ana would hate him if she ever discovered what he had done...

In response, Ana cupped his face in a gentle but firm manner, wanting to show him that she was being very serious." Look at me, please?" she asked.

When he looked up, and saw the way her eyes were locked onto his, it became too much for him." DON'T..." were the words that tumbled from his lips.

At that very moment Ana didn't know what came over her. It was like something had taken over her mind and body. The man in front of her had been so good to her, doing his best to keep her safe and did things for her no one had ever done.

She assumed that he has been through a lot in his life.

Where was his family? His parents? Did he have siblings? There was so much she didn't know about him.

Did he leave them? Has he contacted them lately? So many questions, but no answers, because she wasn't sure if he was ready to hear them.

Ana knew that Christian had his own demons to fight against, every single night. Just the thought of it, tore at Ana's heart and soul.

"That must be exhausting, Christian..." she began, and let go of his face.

He immediately missed her warm hands on his skin, and let out a deep breath." What is?" he whispered.

"To keep everything bottled up inside, and constantly battling your own demons in your mind." she stated, and then grabbed both of his hands, as her heart rammed against her ribcage.

Usually, at this point her mind would be sending her red flags. It would tell her to stop! But not this time... this time her mind did what her heart told it to do.

At that very moment, Christian felt so connected to the wonderful brunette in front of him. She didn't know anything about his past, and still she was able to read him and understand. Everything around him faded, when Ana pulled at both his hands, making him get on his feet.

He towered over her, his eyes landing on hers once more. She had complete control over him; whatever she was about to do, he would simply comply.

"What can I do, Christian? What can I do to help?" she asked, her voice a mere whisper, while her eyes filled with so much compassion it hurt him." Can I do something to make you feel better?"

Christian shook his head in response." No. I have to deal with them, because I caused them myself. It's my own fault."

Ana's eyes welled up, knowing that there was absolutely nothing she could do for him.

(He has to want it. If he didn't want to be helped, it was no use. No matter how hard she tried)

At one point her hand landed on his cheek again, making him suck in a deep breath.

"Why?" she asked." Why are you afraid to be touched?"

"I'm not afraid" he replied.

As her warm hand connected with his face, Christian's eyes fluttered shut once more.

"Ana..." he uttered, his voice so desperate it broke her heart into tiny pieces.

"Yes?" she replied, her voice breaking.

When his eyes opened, Christian lightly grabbed the hand that was resting on his cheek. She held in her breath, as she looked at him. She was seeing so much of him right now. More than what he had shown of himself the last weeks. Christian was beginning to open up to her, and that made her happy but it also terrified her tremendously. What if she would fall for him? That wouldn't be wise, that much her head told her heart.