Seventy-one: Rising and Falling Pakorn Boys

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The night before the launch, Tul returned to his apartment to be surprised by the quiet. As he toed off his shoes at the door, he could hear some noises, so he knew that the Tappitaks were there. They must all be in their rooms already, and as tired as he was, he felt a bit disappointed. He smiled at himself at how quickly he had gotten used to coming home to an apartment full of people, including Max.

He remembered coming home that first night—after the announcement at work, after his meeting with his father and stepmother, after going back to the hospital to meet his mother for the first time freely. He had almost been confused by all the lights and sounds he heard from the entrance. He had even looked again at the number beside his door as if he thought he was at the wrong apartment. And then he remembered; the Tappitaks were all here. The smells of dinner filled his nose, and he had smiled because he recognized the smell of one of his favorite soups that Max made.

But even though when he walked into the kitchen, and he saw dinner was clearly over, he didn't feel badly for being too late to eat with everyone. Max was in the kitchen with Ohm, teasing him as they washed the dishes. Tul heard him saying to Ohm, "she won you lost—keep drying the dishes."

He put down his bag without a sound by the counter. He didn't want them to see him yet. He wanted to just take in what it was like to come into a house with a family. He could see Uncle and Ramida on the sofa. She was clinging to him like a koala, and he remembered how Max had said that she had stopped hugging Pong very much before they went to Switzerland, thinking that at eleven it was too childish, but that she was taking every opportunity now that she was back. Her thirteen-year-old seemed to be trying to make up for lost time.

He watched her watching her father as if she was trying to memorize everything about Pong, and Tul felt his throat constrict, thinking how much he really wanted to do the same.

It was Clara who saw him first. She, too, had been gazing fondly at her husband and youngest child and had looked away before tears came. That's when she saw him.

"Tul, you're back," she stood up and hurried towards him. Everyone turned, but interestingly enough, Ramida didn't loose her hold on her father. They just shifted on the sofa to be able to see Tul.

"My schnӓggli, are you hungry?" Clara asked, eying him with concern. "Max said that you probably wouldn't have eaten dinner, so he left the pot of soup on the stove. I made bread, so that's fresh, too."

Tul had asked Max later what "schnӓggli" meant and thinking about his response now made him feel warm all over again. He had been exhausted that day—both physically and emotionally—but that house full of people had warmed and soothed him. He always liked coming home to the quiet and solitude of his apartment. He had never went out looking to relax like so many people. He believed he needed quiet. What he realized from the Tappitaks is that he needed comfort.

That night, too, he had gotten another wish, alone time with Max before bed. Clara took Pong away when the night nurse came for his treatment, and Ramida dragged Ohm away, making it obvious that she was giving Max and Tul time to be alone, while Ohm had grumbled that he was going to his room anyway. Both Tul and Max had laughed.

"You know I want to ask you how it went today, Tul," Max said. "But you look really tired. You should head to bed. I'm going to get going."

"No, Max," Tul said quickly. "I am tired, but I'd really like to talk to you about today, especially the meeting. I'd also like to ask you something else."

He headed over to what he thought of as their spot on the floor in front of the windows, and Max came and sat next to him. He didn't speak right away, and Max seemed willing to wait. It was another thing that Tul liked about Max. He didn't seem to be bothered by silence. He would wait until he felt Tul was ready to speak.

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