Character Analysis

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Hi! :D

I wasn't really planning on doing a character analysis but I always see negative comments about c!Dream so I thought maybe this would help clear up the thought process behind both him and George's characters and why I wrote them the way that I did. But if you're not interested, feel free to skip over this and if you are going to read it, there will be spoilers.

And obviously, everyone is free to interpret the characters in whichever way they like, this is only to show them from my perspective as I was writing the book. And hopefully it's not too confusing, because I am scatterbrained and I tend to ramble. :)

But before I do that, I'll need to give a little background.

SO, I went into my own rehab program a little over a year ago, and while I was there I started writing a lot. It was mostly out of boredom, but then I realized that it was a good way to express myself and it helped me to get out of my own head a bit. I was talking about it during a recovery meeting one day, and someone suggested that I try putting my own personal experiences with addiction into my writing, and so that's exactly what I tried to do with Dream's character. So a lot of what Dream deals with during this story is coming from my own experiences, from the way he handles relationships, the back and forth struggle between being clean and using, all the way down to the overdose, the coma, and the recovery that followed after. So while I struggled to put it into words in the very beginning stages of the book, it ended up being very therapeutic (and is also the reason why I always feel the need to defend Dream's character lol).

C!Dream:

During the beginning chapters of the book, I didn't really want to focus on Dream's issues too much, I just kind of wanted him to be the partier/bad boy type that George would have trouble not falling for. And I thought it was important to establish the dynamic between them early on, because I knew their relationship was going to end up being a complicated one.

Since the story is mainly told from George's perspective, I think there's a lot of things that the reader doesn't really get to see about Dream from the very beginning. But I always pictured that from the very start of things, he was struggling with a lot; from addiction, to an abusive father, to running away and living in a new country all on his own. And I think a lot of those things have a direct effect on his relationship with George.

I think it's obvious that they both have a thing for each other as soon as they meet, but I imagined Dream being overly cautious because of the fact that he knew he had a lot going on already, and he didn't want to drag George into the middle of it all. But it's kind of one of those things where you're just sort of drawn to that person, even when you try to stay away, and since they live in the same room, it only made it ten times more difficult.

Because of this, Dream tried to use the tactic of keeping George at a distance by telling him he didn't want a relationship. And while I think it's misguided in most cases, I also think that Dream would have thought it would help protect George from the shit show that was his life. But clearly, that doesn't work out too well.

So that's sort of where the dynamic of them just being bodies to one another/having a mostly physical relationship came from; the pull they felt towards one another while struggling to be able to have a normal, functioning relationship.

As soon as George and the reader find out about the addiction problem Dream has, I think it's pretty easy to cast him in a negative light. And I purposely tried to leave this part open for interpretation because I think each individual person probably views his character differently, and I think that view can change drastically by the end of the story.

For me, I was able to sympathize with Dream's character for obvious reasons, and I think this is kind of where the mixed feelings/negative feelings about Dream come into play. I think that he does try his best to get better, but it's not always as simple as just not using, there's a lot more that goes into recovery. There's a huge mental aspect when it comes to addiction, and it's not just something that can be turned off because you want to get better. It's an extremely difficult thing to try and do on your own without professional help, and that's exactly what Dream's character is trying to do. And I think he was in a terrible environment for it, especially constantly having Fundy's character around him.

But he was constantly trying to get better, and I imagined a large part of that being because he had someone like George in his life. And I think this is also where the shift in their relationship occurs, because Dream grew up with an alcoholic father who never seemed to care about him, and he never really invested himself in any other relationships. So George would have been one of the first people who truly cared about him and voiced his concerns, and that would have been completely new for Dream.

And while I sympathize with Dream's character, I think the same thing can be said for George's character because it can be just as difficult trying to help someone who's dealing with addiction.

So something important in this story is the overdose, because I think that's an obvious turning point for both characters, but especially for Dream. And I think it's important to note that in my mind, George being with Wilbur wasn't the direct cause of it, but rather something that just sort of tipped Dream over the edge. I think that George leaving, and having to deal with his problems alone created an already difficult situation, and then finding out that George was with Wilbur would have been overwhelming in the sense that it would have seemed like George was trying to move on, and therefore Dream was losing the one person who had ever really cared about him.

But then I think waking up from the coma and seeing George there was crucial for their relationship, because Dream was able to see that George wasn't going anywhere, and they would finally be able to start building a real relationship together.

C!George:

I wanted to make George a more rule following/focused on school type character that would offset Dream's character a bit. And I think George's character is very different from Dream's because I pictured him having a stable upbringing and a supportive family.

The real root of George's problems were the experiences he had with bullying in both high school and his first university, and that sort of drove him to be singularly focused on school while trying to stay away from a roommate who was clearly going to cause problems for him.

But again, living in the same room with Dream would have made that difficult, and so he was constantly trying to convince himself that their relationship was purely a physical one, and that there were no feelings involved. Now as the reader, you'd probably know this wasn't true, but I think sometimes it's quite easy to be in denial when you know something bad is going to come out of your actions.

So when George finally finds out about the addiction problems, I imagined him to struggle in the sense that he probably would have blamed himself for not seeing it sooner, or not doing enough to help Dream, which I think can be very common. And I think that while he does try to help Dream as best as he knows how, he also doesn't really know how to help him to the extent that Dream needs. So I think that, paired with the lying on Dream's part, is enough to drive George away from the situation.

And I know George is the one to leave, but I think that he would have really struggled with it because he was already very aware of his feelings for Dream at this point, which would have made his decision a lot harder. But I think that he thought it would be best for both of them, and he obviously never would have expected the outcome to be what it was.

In terms of the overdose from George's perspective, I thought it was important for him to be the one to find him, because I think that was the make or break moment in their relationship for him. Once Dream was in the hospital, he had two choices, stay or leave. He chooses to stay because the whole experience was eye opening in the sense that he almost loses Dream, and it effects him so much that he realizes he wants Dream in his life no matter what.

OH, one last thing for George's character is c!Wilbur. So my original intentions were to just have an additional character that was only going to serve the purpose of making Dream jealous, etc. But then I kind of liked the dynamic between Wilbur and George, and so I kept him in for a bit longer because I think Wilbur's character gave George a healthy outlet to vent and talk about the things he was struggling with. And I think his character also served the purpose of helping George to see that Dream was the only one he was truly interested in being with.

~

OKAY I think that's everything. I hope this wasn't too confusing or boring, just wanted to give some insight. :)

And this is also a good place to say that my DMs are always open, at any time and for any reason, even if you just need someone to vent to, I'm here! And you can always feel free to message me about story questions or anything like that, I'll always try my best to answer.

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