Chapter 23

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Eleanor hung up before he could say anything, otherwise she might've changed her mind. Sebastian stood still, staring at the phone as he felt lost while trying to wrap his head around what had just happened.

Sebastian wasn't expecting that; he was not ready to say goodbye to her just yet; he would not let her go, just like that. This can't be it; this can't be the end. He thought. But the end of what? He wondered. Was there even a beginning?

More questions flew around his mind, and all of them were left unanswered.

Eleanor wiped the tears from her face with the back of her hand, took a deep breath and tried to distract herself with work, unsuccessfully. Every time something was bothering her, she tried to keep herself busy by working, studying, or even learning random new things, but nothing seemed to be working this time around.

Tomorrow is a new day and both of us will pretend that nothing happened, everything will go back to normal, the way it used to be. My plan will be back on track, as it should be. She said, trying to convince herself that such a thing was true as she walked away from Crain Enterprises.

***

Eleanor was out of it all day. She could not focus or think straight. Her mind was foggy and she could not sleep at night. So, this was yet another day where she felt drowsy and weak. Every time the elevator door opened, she would jump in her chair, afraid that it would be Sebastian. After their last phone call, they still had not seen each other face to face.

The guilt from ending their pact was consuming her, but most of all, she felt hurt. And the pain of wondering if any of their conversations and moments had been real was unbearable. She was so lost in her thoughts, as she started blankly at the monitor in front of her; something extremely out of character for her; that Larissa noticed right away that something was off.

Her boss appeared behind Eleanor and tapped on her shoulder.

'Can you come to my office, please?'

Dreading what her boss had to say, Eleanor got up. She knew she wasn't doing a good job, but it was only for the day. She would be better the next day.

'You seemed tired. Are you sick? Do you need to go to the doctor?' Larissa asked with a worried frown.

Feeling slightly calmer, now knowing that Larissa was just concerned about her — and that her job did not seem to be on the line — Eleanor organized her thoughts and shook her head in response.

'No. I'm fine. Thank you for asking.'

'Are you sure?'

She nodded. 'I just didn't sleep enough the past two nights. I promise I'll be better tomorrow and that I will do my job properly.'

Larissa knew Eleanor was not telling the whole truth, but she didn't want to push her. 'You can leave a little earlier today. Your workday is almost over, anyway.'

'No. There's no need for that. I'm fine.' Eleanor quickly said.

She was aware that she had neglected her work. The one thing that she was trying to avoid had just happened.

'Don't worry about it. I know that you'll make up for it tomorrow. I trust you,' Larissa said with a motherly smile. 'Go home and get some rest.'

Eleanor nodded and left the office.

Sebastian arrived at the office right after Eleanor had left, and as soon as he saw the empty desk, he went straight to Larissa's office.

'Did Eleanor leave earlier?' he asked as he barged in.

'Yes.'

'Did something happen?'

'She just wasn't feeling well, so I told her that she could go home earlier.'

'Is she sick?'

'No. I don't think that's it.'

'Then what's wrong with her?'

'What happened between the two of you?'

'I'm not sure. Did she say anything about it?'

Larissa sighed; she didn't want to interfere any further, but she was starting to get annoyed by Sebastian's behavior.

'You've messed it up already, didn't you?'

'Shut up, Larissa. Why are you so against it?'

'I am not against it, Sebastian. I was against the lie. I'm still against the lie. Not against you dating anyone. But how can you expect to build a good relationship based on a lie? How can you trust each other? I warned both of you that things would get messed up pretty quickly.'

'I didn't plan any of this. I didn't plan on dating anyone. This wasn't my intention.'

'Then what was your intention? Where were you going with this?'

'I don't. I just,' — he pressed his lips together and took a deep breath — 'what do you suggest I do?'

'Do you like her or are you just confused by your idiotic plan?'

Sebastian remained in silence.

'I suggest you give some serious thought to that before making any rash decisions.'

He sat still on the chair in front of Larissa for a few minutes, until he got up, walked out, and went into his office without saying a word.

As soon as Eleanor arrived home, she laid down on the couch and starred at the ceiling. I just need a good night's sleep. She sighed. I just need to go back to my old self.

She wondered why she had bumped into Sebastian Crain at Montgomery. Why did she have to want to work at his company, why did he have to ask her, out of everyone else in the world, to go to a wedding with him, and why did she say yes? Why did you say yes in the first place? You were so stupid. She reprimanded herself as she wiped from her face the mascara that her tears had dragged down.

A single person had turned her life upside down pretty quickly. The straight line to success that she had drawn out for herself was coming to an end, and the road ahead was starting to have some bumps along the way.

Eleanor now understood that she was not as ready as she thought to deal with the vicissitudes of life. She had come to the realization that not everything was under her control and that she had yet to learn how to cope with that.

Sebastian stayed late in his office as he stared at emptiness, trying to organize his thoughts. Soon he realized the problem wasn't in his head but in his heart, and he was not good at dealing with the types of mishaps that come with love. He was in denial and although he was now completely aware of it; he was still oblivious to what steps he should take next.

Aside from his family and some close friends, he did not trust many people. Sebastian was used to shutting down people and to ignore the world around him. He wasn't interested in most people, and he had never connected with someone before as he had with Eleanor; it was something new and unique to him. He had never felt the need to be with someone before; he had never felt the need to know everything about someone, the need to have them in his life. This was the first time that he had met someone that he could not let go of.

Sebastian did not know what to do, but he knew this much. He needed her in his life, no matter what.

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