Falling (Bucky Barnes)

11 - Panic

After thirty minutes of Natasha and Wanda silently sifting through costumes they finally pick out enough for everyone to try on. They both tried to find costumes that Pepper and Elissavet would actually like. They walk over to the sitting rooms where Pepper is waiting. Natasha raises her brow silently asking where Elissa is. Pepper nods her head to the door she's standing by. They all enter the fitting room and Elissavet looks down with a flushed face.

She feels guilty for ruining their trip, even if Pepper assured her over a hundred times that she didn't. She also is embarrassed that she let another person see that side of her. Elissa looks up at Wanda expecting to see her give a pitiful or angry look, but instead, she is greeted with a smile. The smile calms her down a little bit and they display the costumes they picked for them to try out.

The rest of the trip was fun, they ended up going shopping around for more things and just to browse so that they could spend some time with Elissa to make her happier. When they return it is already dark and they all head to their rooms to put away their newly bought items.

Elissavet wakes up at two fifteen this morning. She groans turning back to plop her head on her pillow. She stares at the ceiling, letting her thoughts run wild in her head. Trying to get more sleep for her date today, she tries to just lay still and go back to sleep. Eventually, after about an hour or two of trying, she is able to fall asleep even with all the monsters in her head.

She is violently awoken by another nightmare, this time it was worse. It involved someone she never wanted to see in that way. This is why she doesn't try to go back to sleep. It just makes things worse.

Walking up to the mirror and turning on the light she sighs, at least the bags under her eyes are a little smaller. Rubbing her eyes with her palms, she strips and steps into the shower. As she's massaging the shampoo through her long hair she remembers that today she has a date. She grimaces and a wave of anxiety rushes over her. She tries to calm herself. It was just a nightmare, it wasn't real. He's not going to do anything. She's going to be fine. As much as she repeats those last two sentences it doesn't do anything to calm her worries.

She turns off the water and steps out to the fluffy towel waiting for her. She wraps it around her body and looks in the slightly fogged-over mirror. She frowns seeing that her bruise is still pretty visible. Since it has only been like two days she didn't expect it to be gone, but she did hope that it would at least start to become less visible. She decides to go get her clothes so she can start on her makeup.

She walks out of her bathroom and immediately freezes when she sees Clint walk in.

He had just opened her bedroom door at the same time she opened the bathroom door. He had been knocking for a while and when he asked FRIDAY where she was it informed him that she had been in the bathroom for about two hours. Of course, this doesn't sit well with him and he immediately thinks of the worst possible reasons. His already worried face grows even more worried when he sees the bruise on her neck. Without thinking, he immediately walks up to her to examine the bruise. Elissa quickly ducks back into the bathroom and shuts it in his face, turning the lock.

She leans against the door shaking. Why did he move towards her so fast? Was it because she was just wearing a towel? He wouldn't do that, would he? Maybe he was just looking at her bruise? What if he was going to hurt her? Was that his intention? Is he going to hurt her for shutting the door on his face and locking him out? The last question brings tears to her eyes. History seems to be repeating itself over and over again.

Clint calls for her through the door, he is worried as hell. First, she was crying, then he had to leave, now he comes back and she has a bruise on her neck? What the hell is going on? "Elissa please open the door," he pleads. The only response is a small whimper that makes his heart shatter. "Lissie? Hun? Can you come out here?" he continues.

She doesn't know what to do. There could be so many different outcomes. If she goes out he could hurt her for locking him out. If she stays in he could break down the door and then hurt her. If she stays in he could wait until she comes out to then attack her. Or maybe he could comfort her if she comes out. Maybe he could hold her and tell her that everything is going to be okay, maybe tell her that she isn't as fucking hopeless and broken as she thinks she is. She hits her head against the door and scolds herself; why would he do that? That's absurd. It's not like he cares about her or anything. It's not like he is a father figure that actually cares about her. No, he is just some guy that she is living with who probably doesn't give a shit about her.

When she hits her head against the door Clint becomes desperate; what on earth is happening to his baby Lissie? She has never been like this before. Tears begin to form in his eyes as he speculates over the possible things that could have happened to her. Although it had only been a few months that she has lived here he immediately was drawn to her. He felt this urge to help and comfort this distant, guarded, frightened girl. Although Elissa doesn't think so, Clint believes that they are both pretty good friends, he sees her as the daughter he was never able to have. He tries his best to make Elissavet comfortable and make sure that she is okay.

Elissa had never actually had a meltdown or panic attack in front of Clint. Usually, when they happen she uses an excuse to leave the room or area they are in so she doesn't break down in front of the Avengers; how embarrassing would that be?

Sometimes Natasha and Pepper would swoop in to rescue her before she makes a scene because they know she isn't ready to share. They don't want to pressure her even more than she is being pressured with everything else.

Clint suspects that someone must have hurt her yesterday because before that he had never seen her break down or cry. He's wrong of course, but he has no idea. "Lissie can you come out here to talk? That's all I want is to talk to you and look at the mark on your neck," gently coos into the doorway.

Silence.

Growing worried with the prolonged silence, he races to find Natasha, knowing that she will know what to do. He doesn't have to sprint far because he sees her making her way over to her room. Natasha is carrying some of her jewelry because she promised to let Elissavet borrow some.

Clint skids to a stop in front of Natasha instantly worrying the ex-spy with his panicked expression. "Elissa, I don't know- she has a bruise- hid from me- she- bathroom- locked- silence," he stumbles, struggling to fight through his panic. Usually, he keeps cool in situations like these, but at the moment he fears that the silence meant only one thing.