Falling Up (A Larry Stylinson FanFic)

Words of Wisdom from Zayn

Author's Note: I hope everyone is staying safe right now! I know Zayn leaving is difficult but he's still here and he's going to be happier and healthier now. If he's taking care of his mental health, he would want all the fans to as well. Make sure if you need it you have someone to talk to or see a mental health professional or call a hotline, there's so many ways to get help when you need it, you're never alone. I'm always here to talk if anyone needs to- stay positive you guys, and I hope this chapter is a good tribute to his time in the band <3 

"I don't want to do this," Louis said shaking his head over and over. He wasn't quite as drunk as Harry but he still seemed out of it.

"Then don't," Harry murmured, tugging at the hem of Lou's shirt. "Lou, I wan to be with you so fucking bad, it feel so different than everything else- we're special, Lou... we're special."

"What are we going to do though?" Louis asked. "Management doesn't want us to be together and we can't just-" 

"We can keep a secret," Harry insisted. "I won't tell them if you don't." He felt frantic. He could feel Louis slipping away from him already. 

"I doesn't work that way," Louis said, running his fingers through his hair. Harry could see all of his muscles tense up. 

"Yes it does," Harry said, his eyes still watering. "Just please, Louis. I need you. I need this. This is the best feeling in the world, I need this I don't want it to- Lou. I love you." Harry wasn't sure if his words were making sense, but his brain was a jumbled mess at the moment. 

"Just give me time," Louis said, rubbing his forehead. 

Harry paused, part of him waiting for Louis to say he loved him back. "Okay," Harry said, his voice breaking a little. He crawled out of Louis' bunk and went back into his own, closing the curtain behind him. 

*** 

"I don't know what to do," Louis said, taking a deep breath through his cigarette. 

Smoke trailed slowly between Zayn's lips. "Well what do you want to do?" 

"Well management wants me to-" 

"I didn't ask what management wants," Zayn said. "What do you want?" 

"Do we have to talk about this?" Louis sighed. "It's all just such a mess." 

"Yeah, we have to talk about it," Zayn said, tapping the ash off the end of his cigarette. 

"Well the fans would want me to-" Louis started. 

"Nope," Zayn cut him off. "Still not answering the question." 

Louis sighed heavily and the air filled with smoke. 

"Do you fancy Harry?" Zayn asked. 

"God this is such an awkward conversation..." Louis muttered. "Yes, I... fancy Harry. His stupid green eyes and that ridiculously slow voice, and I just feel like I can't even keep my hands off him... I'm such a mess because of him." Louis laughed a little, but it didn't reach his eyes, which were still holding onto his worries. 

"I think that's what this sort of thing is supposed to be like," Zayn said. "And I think you need to do what's best for you."

"What if it's not what's best for the fans?" Louis asked. "I know they like picturing that they might end up with one of us one day... I understand that, and I want them to still have that. If me and Harry both come out as being into guys, wouldn't that kind of ruin that? I can't just take that away. I know how important that is to a lot of girls and I like being able to support them like that. Like obviously we'd try and keep it a secret, but these things always get out... what if the whole band falls apart because of this?" 

Zayn blew out his last puff of smoke before twisting the cigarette butt into the pavement with the heel of his boot. "I don't think you understand the fans as well as you think you do. Some of them might be a little heartbroken- I mean, a lot of them will be pretty happy because of the whole Larry thing-" 

Louis laughed a little. 

Zayn continued, "But I think they know that if you're happy they're happy. No matter what happens, it's been the most amazing... wow, almost five years, right?" 

Louis nodded smiling. 

"It's been an amazing almost five years," Zayn said, "and if you've put the band and the fans first for so long. It's okay if you need to put yourself first now. No one will blame you, no matter what comes out of it." 

"Thank you," Louis said quietly. 

"I love you, man," Zayn said, pulling Louis into a hug. "I'll love you no matter what happens." 

"I love you too," Louis said into Zayn's shoulder. 

"There's someone more important you should be saying 'I love you' to right now," Zayn said with a smile. 

Louis nodded, and put out his cigarette. He knew exactly where he needed to be. 

Author's Note: Because I have been seeing a lot of scary things going around since yesterday I'm going to stress this one more time. If you or someone you know needs help PLEASE get help, there are SO many resources, please use them. <3