Moonlight Kisses

a little while longer

jordyn.

A true sanctuary. It's hard to come by if you've spent all your life running. Running from someone, yourself, your demons, it's all the same. Eventually, you become exhausted, both mentally and physically. Surrendering yourself to whatever it is you've yet to accept appears to be the better option as opposed to fighting it another day.

But then that sanctuary comes along. The place you can rest and feel safe from the thing that's been chasing you down. When you've spent so many nights and days on the run, the first day of actual tranquility seems to have turned back time. The minutes are so long, you start to enjoy life for what it is and not survive because you must. Eventually, you get comfortable in that state of repose that life on the run becomes this hazy thing at the back of your mind. The paranoia, the skittish patterns, the exhaustion, it all fades to the background of this soft tranquility. So much so that you forget it's even there.

I was one of the lucky ones. Contrary to my own belief that I was destined for bad things to keep happening to me. Then I stumbled across my own sanctuary, the stubborn boy beside me. My stubborn boy. It's funny how two people who were tirelessly running from their issues found themselves a sanctuary, a home, within each other. We had to find each other in order to save ourselves. Our broken parts mended each other out of the love we carried for one another.

When we are caught up in the bliss that we are now, everything else subsides. Everything the outside world wants to come at us with fades to black when we're together and I wouldn't have it any other way. It may hurt like hell when we get those reminders of what we're supposed to be dealing with, yet I'll gladly take that pain for just one more second in every ignorantly blissful day spent with him.

It's so much better than being on the run from my own self-destructive thoughts.

Suddenly, I feel a familiar pair of soft lips brushing the side of my neck. Had I not known he was the one beside me, my skin would have told me exactly who's lips those were. The only person my skin perks up for is him. Goosebumps erect underneath his breath. Underneath his every exhale, a shiver crawls down my spine.

Beau tightens his hold on my waist. Every night when he drifts off to sleep, his arm will go limp. That and his softened breaths are how I know that he's fallen asleep at the end of each day. Some night when he falls asleep before I do, I'll carefully shift to lie on my back. I take the greatest peace out of watching him at his most relaxed state. There's just something about the adorable pout in his lips and the absence of a crease between his brows that makes him appear more youthful. Less intimidating to the world. Maybe that's why not just anyone can see him the way I do. While the world sees him as this angry, impulsive person, I see the softer side of him. The loving, vulnerable boy that cares with all he has. The boy that whispers 'I love you' every night before bed is a rare sight and one I was so lucky to have witnessed.

When I look at him in his most natural state, that's when I remember exactly why I fell in love with him in the first place. I didn't fall for the boy that looked at the world and hated every bit of it. I fell for the boy that saw optimism in his world when he allowed himself to open up to me. I fell in love with Beau, not the callous facade he puts on.

"Good morning," I murmur, keeping my voice extra low this morning. My head is pounding relentlessly. A consequence of a night of partying that I did not miss.

The party though...now that was a great fucking time. I'm so happy I got to share last night with him. Every bit of it. In my eyes, it made up for all the hours of the day we spent apart because I don't want to ruin the shock of him seeing me and all the work we put into last night's venue. Believe me, his genuine reactions to both were all worth the wait.