I'm Lost With Out You

bad day

A couple days later through mental breaks and flashes of the old Nathalie shining through they all made the best of a horrible situation. Gabriel had tried many things to help her cope and to destress and the only thing that worked was Adrien and chess.

She had been playing with Gabriel and was in her way to victory when a team of two officers came into her room. Gabriel got up.

"What are you doing here??" He asked a bit defensive. "Sir we have to talk with Ms sancouer... We also need to prep her for trial" the male officer was trying to reason with him and the smaller female officer knelt by her. "Good morning Ms sancouer. I'm officer Santiago.... How has your morning been?" Nathalie was nervous but hid it well and sat up straight. "It's been fine.... Why are you here?" "I wanted to ask you about your captor and what happened.... Are you ok with that?" She looked to Gabriel who had his back to her so she couldn't look for his answer. She looked to her hesitantly. "Do I have to??" "Well... Yes... Only because there will be a trial and we have to have and witness evidence..."

She froze up and got scared. "Trial?! No one said anything about a trial... And he's going to be there?!" She put her hand on Nathalies. "Hey it's ok he won't hurt you... He'll be far away" "no he'll hurt me I can't... No no I don't wanna talk then!" She yelled out pushing her away. "Ms sancouer please-" "no leave me alone I don't wanna think about him!" Gabriel quickly went over and held her close trying to get her to calm down. "You don't have to... Your ok... He's no wear near here I promise..." She wasn't able to calm down. "Mr agreste-" "officers I'm sorry but it's only been days since she was found... I'll work with her but she is in no shape to have an actual investigation going right now.. I'm asking you in the nicest was possible to leave" they left looking defeated and Nathalie buried her face in his chest.

"Are they gone? Please I don't want them to come back..." He held her close. "Their gone... Im so sorry... Relax Nathalie... Just calm down" "I know I know I know! I'm Sorry I shouldn't be so upset but I... I just-" "Nathalie breathe.... In and out... Slowly..."

He gently pulled away holding her face in his hand trying to calm her down. She followed his instructions and got her breathing back on track. She was still upset and just laid against him. "I don't wanna see him again... There gonna make me... Your gonna make me..." "If it were my choice I would have killed him... And no one would see him again... But that officer had said... That he was hired.... Did he say anything about a boss or a-" "No stop please I don't wanna... Sir... Please stop!" She looked away. Gabriel hugged her tighter. "I'm sorry... I was curious I'm sorry.." she looked up to him. "Ill be fine... I just I dont-" he stoked her hair gently. "Nathalie its ok... You don't have to explain yourself I get it..." She leaned on his chest. He just sat there with her trying to keep her safe. She had fallen asleep but they all knew what happened after words although Gabriel hoped she would be able to sleep.

But she wouldn't. All of these memories flooded back and she held Gabriel bawling her eyes out. And within 20 minutes like clock work she clung to him and started crying. He held her and played with her hair. "Shhh... Your ok... He can't get you.... Your safe..."  She woke up and sat up quickly holding her side where her ribs had been broken. "Ow, ow, ow..." She moaned under her breath. He gently rubbed her back. "I know just calm down... You'll be ok"

She had calmed down a bit and leaned into him. "Nathalie... Wanna talk about it??" She looked to him and bit her lip. "It was different.... It wasnt in that storage thing... It's was... In a court room..." He cocked his head confused. "A court room?" She nodded "y-yeah.... He was at his bench... I was at mine Infront of the judge and he... He catcalled me... And started taking about all the things he drilled into my head... And no one did anything they all watched... You watched a-and you laughed...at me as I was humiliated and degraded Infront of the judge...." She cried moving away. He pulled her back gently. "Oh Nathalie... I'm so sorry I would never do that! You know that right?"

She looked down and put her hands in her hair. "I-i just... Its confusing and I'm just so so..... My head is spinning and I can't think straight" he worried about her and held her hands. "Nathalie... I know your confused... Please try and calm down" she looked to him. She looked sad and defeated. "I'm trying... I really am" "I know... And your doing amazing, just hold on a bit longer..."

She dropped her head and choked up a bit. "I-I'm tired... I don't wanna try anymore... I kinda wish he did shoot me..." she admitted. Gabriel's eyes widened in horror. He lifted her face and franticly moved her hair away. "Don't say that! Nathalie you've got so much to liv-" "what's there to live for? I don't matter to anyone..." His hands shook a bit. "I-I care! You matter to me!!" "I'm your assistant..." "And my friend!" "I'm a burden and Im broken! I'm going to be a mess the rest of my life that's why I was left alive!! I was left alive to burden everyone around me..." He shook his head. "No... No that's not true!" "It is! I'm so tired... I'm sick, I'm injured, my mental state is shit........I'm sorry I worried you just to want to die... You shouldn't have come for me... He could have just put a bullet to my chest and I would be gone... And no problem" she had an Erie smile on her face. It made Gabriel uncomfortable. He pulled her close. "Stop it stop it!! I don't want you dead... I... I... I lov- I would miss you too much!!" He hugged her.

She looked to her arm and felt terrible. She scratched her arm lightly and it reopened the wound and felt the blood trickle down her arm. Gabriel looked to her and saw her staring at something and looked to see her bleeding. He quickly sat her down and grabbed some bandages and wrapped her arms. She looked to upset to do anything about it. "No Nathalie! You can't! I-i won't let you leave me!!" He held her hands tightly. She looked more scared then sad now. "G-gabriel.." he snapped thinking she still wanted to kill herself. "No Nathalie your not going to kill yourself!!! I can't lose you" he tightened his grip. Her heart rate went up as she tried to pull on her hands she started to cry a bit and got frantic. "Let me go... P-please!" "Nathalie!" "G-GABRIEL YOUR SCARING ME!!! L-LET ME GO!!" She yelled at him, the monitor went off.  He backed away staring at his hands. "Nathalie... I-I'm sorry... Please I didn't mean-" "just...just stop! It's my fault I know don't apologize its my fault! its my fault! It's my fault!!!"

A nurse had come in and upped her dosage of morphine to calm her down. "Shhhh.... Ms sancouer your ok.... Don't worry your alright..." She laid her down gently. She went stopped yelling and turned over sobbing into the pillow.

The nurse had asked Gabriel what happened and he knew she didn't wanna stay here so he decided to say that she had had a memory and she got scared. She seemed pleased and left.

Gabriel sat next to her and rubbed her back. She turned over a bit and looked to him. "I told you I'm a mess..." "But you were strong for so long! It's ok... There's nothing wrong" "everything is wrong!!" Gabriel wiped her tears away and shook his head. "No your doing amazing..." She looked away and laughed under her breath. "Crying isn't very professional... I'm sorry..." He laughed a bit. "No but it's ok... Because when was the last time we were strictly professional??" She thought for a minute. "Never really I guess."
He smiled and wiped a tear. "Exactly... All you need to think about is getting better ok?" "I'm trying...." "I know... And I'm so so proud of you..."