i don't deserve this | dotae | nct | bxb

七

sensitive topics !
haphephobia, sex@ual assault

Eventually, both boys slinked out of the cupboard.

"It's not safe here, let's go somewhere else," Taeyong warily glanced at the shut oak door in case the hostile man decided to make a U-turn for whatever of his reasons.

"Okay..." Doyoung unlocked the latched cupboard door, grateful that Taeyong did not bombard him with questions right away.

"Let's crash Jaehyun's house, it's not too far from here," Taeyong followed after Doyoung, who was still constructing an explanation in his head, his writing abilities suddenly failing him as he scrambled for the right words, hoping that there would be no need to resort to lying.

Taeyong turned when he heard a clank. He turned to see Doyoung opening his window one of his legs dangling off the narrow ledge of the window.

"It's too early to give up!" Taeyong wrapped his arms around Doyoung who gave him a fierce stare but did not shake the arm off ashe grey hoodie around him served as a barrier between Taeyong's contact and his precious skin. He was also somewhat acoustemed to Taeyong's random touches.

"There's a ladder here. I'm afraid that he'll be guarding the main door, he doesn't know how often i use this ladder," Doyoung started to climb down. Taeyong mouthed an 'oh' got through the window, staggering down after closing the window after him.

The walk to Jaehyun's house was a quiet one, neither of the boys saying a word or even trying to. Doyoung was dazed out as he trailed behind Taeyong, shuffling his feet. He lifted his head when Taeyong stopped walking and bangedon the door, which painted a clean white to match with the house. The house was a pale white under the gentle ray from the moon. The neighborhood was quiet and dark. Doyoung heard a rustle and unknowingly inched closer to Taeyong.

They were returned with silence. Until, the door was slowly opened and a sloppy, half-asleep Jaehyun opened it. Behind him was another tall figure, who had latched himself around Jaehyun's frame, leaning his head against Jaehyun's left shoulder.

"We're crashing here tonight," Taeyong reached for Doyoung's hand, and as if suddenly remembering something, changed his target to Doyoung's hoodie covered arm and pulled him into the house.

"Where are your parents?" Taeyong asked as he dragged Doyoung in.

"Out."

"No wonder, I see you've found someone," Taeyong was able to make out the figure as Jungwoo, who was in the same History class as him. "We'll be taking your spare room three on level two,"

Jaehyun whistled, "I see you've found someone too. You didn't have to bring him here to do something dirty,"

"Shut up, he's my project mate. Due to inconveniences we'll need a place to stay for the night." Taeyong rebuked before guiding Doyoung up the long flight of stairs, knowing his way around Jaehyun's house from the number of times he came over for movies.

"Suit yourself. Babe and I will be in my room," Jaehyun brought his fingers to the bangs on the male who was latched on them, fondling them endearingly. He shut the door and princess-carried Jungwoo to his room.

Taeyong watched Doyoung enter Jaehyun's room with sad eyes.

"Just sit somewhere. When you're comfortable, we can start talking," Taeyong crawled on the bed against the wall and raised his brows as Doyoung sat crossed-legged on the floor, stiff as a board. He patted the empty area on the bed next to him, patiently watching Doyoung climb up the bed and lean against the bed frame, his right leg over his left.

"Was that your father?" Taeyong asked cautiously, closely watching Doyoung's expression in case he said something wrong. Doyoung nodded bitterly.

"Is he...bad to you?" Taeyong chose his words carefully, seeing the fragile and easily shattered state Doyoung was in. Doyoung sniffed, "He's the worst,"

Taeyong became silent after that, sensing the severity of the situation.

"Do you not like to be...touched?" Doyoung froze at that word, maybe it was time Taeyong knew.

"Yes, I have Haphephobia," He unwrapped the truth to Taeyong
(Haphephobia: the fear of touch)

"I'm sorry," Taeyong gasped, remembering how he wrapped his arms around Doyoung and clamped his mouth when Doyoung's father was being a monster in Doyoung;s room.

"It's okay, it felt...nice,"

"Nice?"

"Yeah, after avoiding touch as much as I could for so long, your touch felt warm and...assuring, and I found that I was not trying hard to get rid of you" Doyoung unconsciously wrapped his hands around him, Taeyong's sharp eyes noticed this.

"Is it a result of anything?" Taeyong carefully spoke, he felt like he was walking on a field of bombs. He had an idea of who could have caused this but decided to hold some of his words back.

"My father's assault," Doyoung was growing anxious, sweat trickling slowly down the back of the neck. He held his tears in.

"I'm sorry-"

"Sexual assault," and Doyoung broke down, unable to contain them anymore.

dark hm ?
updated after a long ass ride.

thank you for the support, so close to 100 !

thank you for waiting.