Let It Be

Chapter 36

The next Monday, even before first period started, Tristan walked by and knives of fear cut through my veins.

He approached me. "How's life, Abby?" he said casually.

"Just fine, thanks," I mumbled, digging through my locker in an attempt to appear too busy to talk.

"Ready to take me up on my offer yet?" he asked suggestively.

"And which one is that?"

"The one where you and I hook up."

"No thank you," I said, trying to appear casual. "I'm with Sam."

"And you were once with Eric," he pointed out.

I winced. Oh gosh. He's going to use this as leverage over me for me to be with him. No... oh, please no.

"Well. Not anymore. And I'm not ready for more change at the moment."

"It'll be worth it."

"No thank you."

"Is that what you told Eric, too?"

No. I never dared fight back when he hit me. I wasn't sure if I would come out alive if I ever did. I did what I needed to survive. And that was submission. He hit me, I took it. He told me to do something, and I did it.

The shame boiled inside of me as I remembered, blushing wildly. Tristan knew now how weak I was. He knew the demeaning things I had done for him. He knew what I had given into.

And, if things went the way it was looking, if I didn't give Tristan what he wanted, everyone in Hartford would know it, too. What was I to do? Give into another man because I was afraid? Give in, and let another man rule me? Or deny him, let him tell everyone, and live in shame for the rest of my pathetic life?

"Tristan, please just leave me alone."

"No, I don't think I will."

"Don't you get it, Tristan?" I finally snapped in exasperation. "Don't you get what he did to me? He destroyed me, he destroyed me mentally and emotionally until there was nothing left. It wasn't about the pain, the physical abuse; it was about what he did to who I was."

"So physical things don't matter to you? Then you won't mind getting together with me, you said it yourself."

I cried out in frustration and fear. "You don't get it!"

"Shea." Coach Dunlap called down to me. I glanced nervously at Tristan, then darted down the hall to meet her. He let me go.

But he didn't let up.

---------------

The next day, Mina came up to me and Sam after PE. "Abby, are you okay?"

With my eyes, I begged Mina not to say anything about it, not in front of Sam. "I'm fine."

Sam looked at me with a deep frown. "What happened?"

Mina didn't stop and I almost wondered if she was doing it on purpose. "You looked so upset when Tristan—"

"I said I'm fine," I interrupted much louder.

"Tristan?" Sam growled lowly. "What did Tristan do?"

"Nothing."