Camren One Shots

Your Last Voicemail

258 days, 7 hours, 48 minutes and 35 seconds is the exact time since the last time I saw you, since the last time I touch you, most people think it's weird that I even count the seconds from that day but I know that you would think that's adorable, August 11 from last year we had a big fight, so to speak, I remember that I screamed and threw things to you and not even that time you raised your voice to me, you never did, I screamed that I wanted you to leave and that I hated you, It wasn't true, I was so mad at you but you know what's funny about this? I can't even remember why we fight, every day I try to remember why I was so angry that day, but I just can't.

I remember you walked out the door with you head down like a puppy that has just been scolded for eating a pair of shoes, I remember thrown all your clothes through the window, I remember taking all our pictures and throwing them away, God I was so damn pissed, then why I can't remember why we were arguing?

They had been two hours since you had gone and then my phone rang, it was you, a picture of you making a funny face appeared on the screen of my phone with the name "Love of my life <3" rang once, twice, three times, the fourth time I decided to send you straight to voicemail because I couldn't let you win, my ego was stronger, I should have taken your call maybe things would be different now.
It was past midnight you were gone six hours ago, you'd never gone so long after a fight I was starting to get worried so I take my phone and dial your number but again my ego and pride prevented me of press the call button, I should have called you, but I couldn't let you win, right?

2:00 AM there was no sign of you so I began to freak out, where the fuck were you? It pass through my mind several times to call you but I didn't, I thought you were being childish and selfish, so I let it pass, when you came back home I would have another reason to argue with you.

4:30 AM that's it! I was going to kill you at this point I was worried, so I thought about calling you and this time actually was going to do it but the sound of my phone stopped me "unknown number" appeared on the screen, I hesitated a bit on answer the call but this time I did.

6:00 AM Twelve hours since you got out through that door, it felt so distant, as if had been twelve years, why I was sitting in the waiting room of a hospital? Where were you? Everything seemed so confused, the pain in my chest seemed to increase with the passage of the second. Hot tears that run down my cheeks seem to be endless. Where are you? ...

8:00 AM Fourteen hours since our fight, your parents rushed through the hospital doors, doctors refused to give me information about you, because I wasn't a close family member, can you believe this shit? How they dare to say I'm not a familiar close to you? You're the fucking love of my life, the other half of my heart, my soul mate, if that is not a close family member then I don't know what the fuck is, I stay beside your parents waiting for the doctor to appear and when he finally showed up and said the words something inside me died.

9:30 AM Fifteen hours and thirty minutes since you got out through the door of our house and I'm standing in front of you, or what it used to be you, you're lying on a cold metal plate your skin looks paler than normal, how can you still looking so beautiful? Why aren't you moving? Why aren't you smiling? Doctor's words echo in my head "A car ran her over as she came out from a bakery she died instantly, we couldn't do anything to save her, sorry" What were you doing leaving a bakery? Why I didn't answer your call? I'm sorry, please forgive me.

11:00 AM Seventeen hours since I saw you. I'm lying on the couch in the living room, hugging your favorite jacket smells like you, please come through that door, I promise that I will never yell at you again, I regret everything I said before, you know I was just talking shit when I said I hated you, right?

It's been a week and still lying in the same place hugging your jacket, your funeral is tomorrow and I don't know if stand it I don't want to be there, because once I see a tombstone with your name I know that everything is real and not just a horrible nightmare and I can't do that.

Throughout the funeral I kept my eyes closed repeating to myself "wake up, wake up" but I wasn't asleep and this wasn't a nightmare it was real life and you were gone.

I was checking my phone today, there was a voicemail from you from the day of the accident, I couldn't hear it, everything felt so fresh.

Four months, which is equal to 124 days since you left, I miss you, sometimes I dream with the sound of your voice but when I wake up I can't remember how it sounded, it scares me, maybe I'm forgetting about you? I don't want to forget you.

I decided to listen to your voicemail, I can't believe I'm about to hear the last words from the woman I love...

"Hey kitten, wohh straight to voicemail huh? You're really upset ... look Camz... I'm sorry ok, I... I don't know what to tell you... sorry I'm stupid and childish, and I know sometimes it seems as if I never take anything seriously but the true is I've never taken anything more seriously than this... than us... I don't like fight with you Camzi I love you so much... I love you from the first moment I saw you... Do you remember, the bakery that is outside town? When I'm angry or sad or frustrated I come here and I just... just I look to that bakery and everything disappears I don't feel angry or sad anymore because it was there where we met and just... It's funny... I don't know Camz I am not good with words I never know what to say... Forgive for... for everything... don't be mad at me... you know what? I will buy those muffins that you love and we can ... talk about it and we can find a way to fix it, you and me... just you and me Camz... don't give up on my... because I'll never give up on you... you're the love of my life Camila and I... God... I wish you answer my call but ... it's ok Camz... I'll be home soon, ok? I hope you're not still mad at me... see you soon honey... I love you.... never forget about that."
I love you to Lauren... I will always love you, I'll never forget, your last voicemail is the best gift you could have given me, the next time I see you I will not let you walk out that door, I promise, see you soon my love ....