Philosophical Idiotsy (MxM)

7.

Next Monday...

I walked out of my trailer and walked through the dark snowy morning. It was sprinkling snow lightly, and a thick 4-inch deep layer of snow was coating the ground. With every step I took, more sticky snow stuck to the bottom of my boots. No worries though, I would break the snow off at the top of the school stairs, making sure it was a tripping hazard. I'm not evil, I'm just practical.

I made my way through the dark morning, snow getting in my face. I was ready for this week at school, I was going to do so well in the same environment I've been stuck in for a while. Ugh. As I crossed the road, barely any cars were driving by, which made the weather more peaceful. Of course, so was about to die from frostbite, but that was no worry.

This weekend I was thinking about two things. Well, three. This weekend I got to sit down with my dad and talk about a scholarship (which was nice) But I had also been thinking about the boy. Mr. James, I don't know his last name. His not being in the library last Friday got to me for some reason. Of course, I have talked to him like once but something about him just threw me off. I'm shocked I hadn't noticed him beforehand, considering he and Potenza seemed to get along just fine.

The third thing I have been thinking about is my book. The romance novel. Yes I know, the annoying one I keep talking shit about. But I'm starting to warm up to it. Of course, it would never happen to me, but I feel like I enjoy the more intimate sides of life philosophically. Of course, that is the nerd talking, I'm also waiting for Mama Kim to be brought back to life by her husband Richard, and find out where the ice dragon had gone. The thought had made me ancy. That book could not come sooner enough.

After some brutal wind and snow in my eyes, I finally made it to the stupid school. Vangough High, just where I would want to spend my days. I kicked the steps and pushed the snow off of my boots, and walked in. Everyone was in the hallway, giving their usual stares and snorts. It didn't bother me. I'm not the one who is about to be troubled by some random kid's bullshit. Thank goodness for not giving a *pardon my french* fuck.

I eventually made it out of the washed-out hallways and into the library, where Mrs. Potenza gave a familiar wave and smile. A waved back and sat down at my seat, pulling out my romance novel. At first, I was embarrassed by it, but now I walk with pride. I enjoy finding out why the main girl keeps falling in love with men who do absolutely nothing to flatter her.

I flipped through the book for a moment and found my spot, and read for a few minutes. Nothing interesting, just the main character's mom died. Frankly, I was just waiting for one of the main boy characters to make a move. That poor girl needs herself a man. As I read for a few more minutes, I heard footsteps come up to my desk. I was expecting Bianca and maybe even Casey, but I looked up to face someone else entirely.

James.

He smiled at me and gave me a wave. I gave a nervous smile back, wondering what this boy was doing. It was good to see him again, however. The awkward butterflies in my stomach solidified that. "...That's a really good book," James said quietly.

I smiled at him. "Is that so? Do you read a lot of romance?" I asked questionably, trying to start a conversation.

Something about him was so lively and happy, but also awkward. He seemed to keep to himself. Just like me. "No- not really. I only read that and the Twilight books."

I gave him a teasing smile. "Seriously? I couldn't get past the first 50 pages. Does it get better?"

He seemed flustered. "I guess."

Awkward silence. How do I continue this conversation? I decide on an ultimatum. "Do you want to sit down?" I asked, pointing to the chair in front of me.

"...sure." He replied, sitting down.

We both stared at each other awkwardly, and I got to appreciate the finer details I hadn't seen before. He had light blonde hair, clear skin, and brownish-green eyes. They reminded me of the ocean. Not sure why. After I realized I was checking him out, I gained my composure. "So uh- James? What grade are you in?"

"Oh- Junior."

I laughed. "It gets better, I promise."

He laughed, his shoulders beginning to relax. "It's super hard. Speech is hardest for me."

"That class is easy, just remind the teacher of things about speech and she will talk the whole time. Worked for me." I replied, closing my book that was before the open.

"I guess... she overshares a lot. Is it bad?" He asked, a small smile hitting his face.

He was relaxing. Good. "Get ready for December, it gets worse there."

He rolled his eyes and laughed. We had another awkward silence before he pointed at my book. "Hey...How far are you?"

I pulled it out and showed him the page number, and he smiled at me. "It gets better."

"Good." That was all I said before another silence bestowed on us.

The silence was like a car driving by. It was there for a moment, then it stopped. This was super frequent though. Suddenly, an idea popped into my head. "Why aren't you sitting with your friends over there?" I nodded my head towards the table with the 4 boys, staring at a cellphone.

"O-oh them? I uh... I didn't want to today I guess. Are you okay with- uh... My company?" He said in bursts, his voice trailing out.

I gave him a reassuring smile. Just trying to be polite, but part of it was also genuine. "Yeah man, no worries."

Another silence fell upon us before the bell rang, signaling for everyone to get to class. He jumped out of his chair and walked off quickly, giving me an awkward wave. I stayed in my chair, raising my eyebrow.

My thoughts fell upon me in a big burst, like I had been blocking them out. What the hell? That was awkward. But I didn't mind it. Maybe he will say hi tomorrow? We will have to wait and see. Better get to Math, I can't wait to watch the bitch Molly get the homework problems wrong.

I got up from my chair and gave Mrs. Potenza a wave, before entering those hellish hallways yet again. This was going to be a long week.