Michael was diagnosed with lupus when he was a teenager. But his health has deteriorated greatly as he is in need of a new heart. Michael has been on the hospital's waiting list for a new heart for the past year which has been tough on Michael and h...
It's the sight of mother as she comes out to greet us. Ella and I hop out of the car. A huge smile upon her face as she approaches.
"Oh hello. Welcome back . . "
A kiss on cheeks for the both of us. Mother puts her around Ella before looking at us both.
"Did you two have a great time? . . "
I see Ella flash me an incredibly cheeky smile, as we both know that we did indeed have an amazing time. The fact that it was only us . . and no one else. Something that we have desperately needed and after it all. Everything about the weekend away was perfect - just the thought of feeling like the only two people in the world. Being intimate with Ella after so long. To be honest, I have never felt so alive. To have Ella in that way again. She was concerned but I'm hoping that she now has that confirmation. I believe she does. To me, her actions showed that. And I love it. It's as if there is now a rush of confidence within her. A rush of confidence that will stick around. And I couldn't be happier about that. I think back to when she was in pain . . crying so hard while I held her. As her eyes saw me in a state that she thought I wouldn't wake up from, that I wouldn't come back from. But the memory of the events from the weekend Ella and I experienced together seems to take that all away. I nod at mother.
"We had an amazing time, mother . . "
Our bags come back into the house, but to be unpacked this time. The weekend was needed but being back home is also as refreshing. Mother tells us to sit down while of course, she fusses around. She fixes us all coffee as Ella sits right beside me on the lounge. Her hand rests upon my thigh, my arm around her shoulder. I look down at her, kissing the top of her head.
How do I have butterflies every time I look at her?
Having someone like Ella. I feel like it's all just a dream.
She shifts against me. The look in her eyes is obvious as I know she wishes to be close to me. As close as possible. Her head nuzzled against my chest now. Her stillness indicates that she is comfortable. The sound of mother tinkering away in the kitchen is now our focus, overtaking everything else suddenly. The smell of coffee. The rise and curl of the steam that floats out and away of the mug is seen. Mother carries over a mug for me . . and a mug for Ella before she retreats, back in to the kitchen to get her mug that was purposely left behind. With us now, mother sits on the single seater lounge . . her smile wide, her eyes glued on us. I take a sip before placing it gently on the coffee table in front.
"Thanks for house sitting for us, mother . . "
I say softly. Her response, delayed. But only for a few seconds as she swallows her sip off coffee also. Her hands wrap around her mug, holding it firmly in my lap while she speaks - telling us all she has done in our absence. She has dusted, loads of laundry put on. Keeping everything just how we left it. I knew mother was the right person for the job. Photos is what mother wishes to see. I hand her my phone . . her eyes seem to light up with each picture. The view, the space, the fact that it's such an isolated yet beautiful area. Mother is blown away by it. She is gleeful. Ella and I share a look as we had the same feeling inside us when we first arrived. Her eyes come back onto us. But I see that there may be tears. She stands up suddenly, walking towards me. Receiving a hug. It's a hug that is so warm . . full of such love. As mother breaks the hugs, tears are there. I knew it. I suppose she just felt so overwhelmed all of a sudden.
Her hand rests gently on my cheek.
"So happy you're here, Michael . . " She tells me tearfully.
I can't help it, my eyes too begin to water. A soft sniffle from mother is heard as she steps back from me, wiping her tears away.
"Oh I'm a silly women. I shouldn't be getting upset like this . . "
She walks back in the kitchen. Thoughts in her mind, I can tell. Like she has just remembered something. She walks back over to us . . to me, but she holds . . an envelop it appears to be in her hand.
"I got your mail this morning, Michael. And this came . . " Mother says softly.
I take it, looking down at it. Oh my god. It's from her. I can't believe this. I'm left speechless. Please don't let this be just a dream. This has to be real. Please let it be. I feel my heart beating faster and faster. I smile slightly as I'm in the know. I slowly open the envelope, unfolding the paper with handwriting from a person that I have been wishing for.
It reads,
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She does. She does wish to meet me. Of course I will go. The chance for a mother to hear her child's heart beating, as now, their heart sits in someone else . . me. As it keeps me alive this time. The room is silent. Mother and Ella waiting for me to speak first. My eyes tear up once again and this time, they fall. I can't fight it. I feel Ella take a soft hold of my hand as I wipe them away. There is no thought . . going to meet her is something I want to do for myself to finally move on from this chapter in my life. To feel whole again. And to feel complete.
