don't call me a cat fish

the latest saga

i'd was dealing with all the mariah stuff in september 2014,i found myself going back i just wanted to talk to people,but without me knowing i met a new girl allie. she caught my eye and was so funny and so nice to me (as connor) she was like the others a great girl who didn't see it we shared so many interests i really didn't wanna do this again but i found myself doing it yet again how stupid am i ??. we skyped everyday she made me so happy and always always put a smile on my face,she had the cutest laugh and smile, so smart english was her 2nd language but was so great i was teaching her new stuff everyday how us english prononce things our little saying like "flick the light on" or pop the kettle on. i helped her say either,other,ither which seems strange but she couldn't say the th like in thor,i could hear her trying so hard,but she was learning a lot,yes the usual false promises came up and i done stupid things but i never asked for it once. she has a hard time with her step dad and if i ever see that man i will be punching him in the face and the friends boyfriend who ruiened her life like i will hurt them.. i did make promises i will always keep,i will never leave her and i will always be here and will always have faith in her and be here for anything she needs. she found the truth out and like before i was shocked and wasn't ready to lose her, i just wanted a little more time. but it didn't go my way,during my time with allie i went and visited tamara again she asked me to visit her as she needed a friend and i dropped everything and went to her we had a huge talk and she said she now really understood me and she was sorry i said sorry and we hit a gay club. when allie found the truth out for some reason this hurt me a lot more then the others times i still don't know why even now and it happened a week ago. she had done the same as me on rp she had posed as a guy and had a girl fall for her,so to me i guess i thought she'd understand me more but i was so wrong, she let me explain myself and we both cried i still have so much more to tell her,but she don't wanna know for now and has me blocked on everything other then skype she said maybe one day she will slowly let me be her friend again. this day can't come soon enough as i miss her so much i just hope she will one day see i didn't want to hurt her and i'm still here any promise i myself made i will stick to,i worry about her everyday and it's taking all i have to not message her just to say hi i'm still here i still care. she will hopefully read this story as i'm gonna risk it and message her my account in the hope she wont block me and will just read this.