Euphoria x Melancholy

true friends

They know when we're sad, what we need, their hugs don't need to make us beggar, they love with affection shower us with attention, guess everything is just fake if they don't know how to understand our needs or connect. They don't leave for their own needs, they're there even when the world's gone against them. They risk on their lives to save yours, and then all they ask you is to value it within that small heart of yours, yet you seem to not understand it. They would know when you're hiding your scars, they're someone who would hug you when you're feeling alone, someone always at your side in any of life's wars. They're the ones who would always want to know more about you, would always make sure to remember every detail about you. Their hearts paint you in their memory frames, and the blood canvus within their heart pours merry wishes onto the painting reliving, reviving whenever it seems dead to them.

A.N. (ranting, nvm ignore it)

i rmr my ex, Ishu (nickname), for whom i didn't studied during my boards due to health issues and stuffs and i was depended on the last day study. She was my actual first female friend on wattpad, we talked for just a week and after that next day she was talking about drowning and all that suicidal stuffs, she hid but I really genuinely cared for her, it was my exam the next day and i wasn't prepared. somehow i got her to reveal her suicidal thoughts she spammed me with, i stayed online for hours and whole day i kept checking on her. She lied to me she's fine to get me go study, but i knew she wasn't, and i couldn't leave her alone. At least we should have some humanity, for me a life of friend is more precious than my 12th boards. My feelings of friendship were genuine for her.. i couldn't really get my mind off from what she's doing, how's she's doing now and entire day went and my mind was so connected to her i was really sad seeing her like that even tho she acting cheerful and funny i knew what's within.. even though i knew i couldn't do well in exam i was happy at least I'm not a friend who runs away and goes off when she's in so much need. Yet i scored 76% in physics exam that day, i thought i would surely fail. Without studying anything since months, guess if u do good to someone, it will return to you in some way. So stop being overselfish and start caring for your friends and not treat em like a rock lying on the ground to be thrown anytime you're not in need of it :)

Lol i remember she said we're each other's mirror image. It's kinda true but i still wonder, why did u do that to me? If you really loved me, why did u run away from the guy you wanted to marry, the guy who was your fallen angel as you said always. The person who was arranging your life why the hell did u messed him up in confusion. Why did u hid your real identity, isn't it you? My first love, urjo, in disguise? I bet it's you, but why did you leave me when u had no single reason to, why kept me in this confusion??

Once i consider someone as a friend, it's deep from my heart, i don't mean the temporary one time random toxic or fake effortless bmf bullshit ppl do here. Fuck off to em. Friendship can never be true when ppl are just wanting to fuck from their relations and efforts needed to sustain it. I wish i ever found someone who treated me the way i treated her. I doubt i will find tho... I would be the happiest person, if someone understood my complex mind and this extremely broken heart.

Bye bye from here. Take care. No haters here, no judgements pls. Showing the truth bitter isn't wrong right? Hehe