Warning Mpreg ig Idk Cum is intersex so it's only like half mpreg
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Cum with boobies
Fuckity, fuck, fuckity, fuckity, fuck, fuck. As I held the 21 positive pregnancy tests in my hands I realized that it wasn't just 21 broken tests I was preggo. Omfg I have no clue who the baby Daddy is. I quickly grabbed my phone and called my besties Con, Backup, NNN, Virgin, Horny, and Chris.
Once those hoes finally got on the damn call I told them the news "GUYS IM PREGGO AND I DUNNO WHO THE BABY DADDY IS", "Pfffffffttttttt well who tf are the options for that" Virgin said in between giggles. "THIS ISN'T FUNNY YOU SLUT but it's Willy, his dad, all the oopma loompas, Rick Assley, Thanos, myself, the Pope, and Daddy pig", "Well damn you get around don't you you fucking whore" Con said followed by everyone laughter "Well looks who's talking Mr. Fucked almost everyone in Europe on less than a week" which was followed by a ton of ooohhhhs, oh shits, I remember that's, and then Con hanging up like a pussy. I then said bye fuckers to everyone and hung up.
Arg I guess its time to go to the doctor and try and figure out who the baby Daddy is. As I got dressed and ready to leave Con and Chris barged into my home AGAIN. "Okay hoe let's help you get a abor-" before Chris could finish I slapped that bitch and he went flying into the kitchen sink. "OOOOOHHHH DADDY" Chris shrieked while laying in the sink and then the sink turned in spraying cum all over him oopsie. Shit I forgot that bitch has a sink kink ans a fork kink. Oop I may have hit him harder than expected cause when that slow ass hoe finally got up he had a bruise covering half his face and looked hella heated. Con and I started laughing anyway tho.
"LOOK AT WHAT YOU DID TO MY FACE WTF", "You tripped and fell into the sink", "YOU PUSHED ME", "No Cums right you fell into the sink dumbass, anyway let's go to McDonald's" Con said before dragging us to that weird ass clown infested strip club. "I would like 3- no 4 McWhopping Minecraft Dildos and strap ons for me please". As we were getting our food I noticed that the Minecraft Dildos had been changing to rectangular shaped for extra "pleasure". Then I saw one of my possible baby daddy's the Pope on his favorite outfit.
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Ugh it's so sexy I gave it to him as a joke birthday present. He got me so hirny with that small wrinkly old withered shrimp dick. And is loose shit covered wide gaping butthole is so good. Ugh and that disgusting old grandpa smell is such a turn on.
But I have to focus and hide. I turned into a semen side dish despite being a whole ass meal and waited until the Pope left. Wait wtf why is Con stirring me with his frie- NOOOOOO THIS IS THE SECOND TIME WTF I KNOW HE SAW ME SHIFT THIS TIME TOO. AHHHHH. Con starts slurping me up and locking the bowl clean 'This slut really just vored me oooh there are eggos in here my favorite'
