Chapter 11: Pink Steed

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The Lanuus birds fly around but haven't chirped since I've been home. How long did I sleep? I feel rested. I can't recall the last time I had nightmare-free sleep. In fact, I can't remember anything I dreamt about. I was afraid the Orb would make me sleepwalk and stuff again, but I slept great.

"Is it time to wake?" Carfron asks. He sits up, as clean and neat as when he went to sleep. "Why is your hair like that?"

I put my hand to my head and feel the tangled lump in the back that's sticking straight up. "I'm going to the bathroom. If I promise not to leave, can you please stay out here?"

"I will sit here until you return."

"Thank you," I say again. What's made him so agreeable this morning? I'm not investigating. I'm just happy to have a few minutes of privacy.

When I step out, he's right where I left him. "I like that you're not on my heels anymore. I don't appreciate being followed." 

"Today, you fly," he says in such a way I'm not sure if it's a command.

"Is that a question?"

He looks up out of the corner of his eye as if he's thinking very hard. Then he says, "Today, are you flying?"

"No!" I say, slamming the door to my closet. I slept in my clothes last night because I didn't want to change in front of him. I check to make sure he's not in here and dress fast, but he leaves me alone.

A knock at my bedroom door means that it's time to get to work. We'll see if Carfron's right. Will I be flying today?

I leave my closet and find Jonah on the sofa across from Carfron. We eat our breakfast together while Jonah asks all the same questions he did yesterday. Yes, Carfron's still here. No, he hasn't told me why. When he's caught up, he says, "It's interesting that he wants you to fly."

"I'm not ready. I know the council and everybody will make me, but I don't think I can. I've never dealt with death before. I never had anything in my life that could leave me. I understand that Lenox was a pet, and a lot of people died," I wave a hand at Carfron as if acknowledging him makes my next statement not so awful, "But I can't get over losing him. I feel broken and alone."

"Agatha, you're being too hard on yourself. Lenox was the first one you ever felt safe enough to love, and he loved you back. Soulful, unconditional, two-sided love. You should mourn that. It's sad."

"But I'm the reason he's dead. It's my fault."

"No, it's Stratagor Ziras's fault. It's the Grucht Leisck's fault. It's the dragon's fault. It's no one's fault. It was a tragedy, and it could not have been avoided."

"You're wrong. I didn't have to stay. I believed Stratagor Ziras. I went to Rhomstead. I took Lenox there. It's my fault." My heart is racing. I wish I could inflict a physical wound to myself that could match my emotional one. My guts are screaming, but I can't produce a single tear.

"Agatha, look at me." I've never heard Jonah use such a stern tone. It frightens me and grabs my attention. "Stratagor Ziras is a liar. He lied to you. You never had a choice. He tracked you to Rhomstead. Had you gone off course, even a little, you would've discovered how much of a choice you didn't have."

"Then why did he give me the Orb."

"Honestly?"

"Yes, let's try that."

"There could only be two reasons. He never thought you would escape, or he did something to it."

That last part makes me look at Carfron. Could he be working for Ziras? "Carfron would be a great spy. Do you think that's why he wants me to fly? So I can get recaptured by Stratagor Ziras."

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