**Law 10: Infection: Avoiding the unhappy and unlucky

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Those who are "infectors" create their misfortunes. If you are not careful, they will drag you down with their misery.

Application -

Perhaps you have a friend who is always encircled in drama. Or a co-worker that spreads gossip and negativity. If you are around people like this constantly, their mood and actions will affect you. You may act on their bad advice unwittingly, and bring misfortune upon yourself.

Conversely, if you surround yourself with intelligent, happy, and successful people, their fortune will rub off on you. I recommend reading "The Proximity Principle" by Ken Coleman to see how you can surround yourself with the right people to have the most fulfilling career.

A Friend in Need, and Infector Indeed -

I had a friend, let's call her N, who had such a hard life. She was an up-and-coming artist, who lived a few hundred miles away. She was always either in the middle of or just recovering from a crisis. She lost her job because her boss was shady and evil. Her boyfriends were all abusers or cheaters and friends had all abandoned her. N just could not get a break.

Over the years, I would take her out when I was in town, or on girls' trips to cheer her up. I used my connections to get N and her boyfriend tickets to Disneyland because she said she always wanted to go but couldn't afford to. I contributed to her Go-Fund-Me's and pulled more favors when she asked. I worked hard for my money and didn't have a lot, but was happy to help a friend in need.

Recently, N came to LA for a while to escape a terrible situation at home. We had been close once and I wanted to be there for her. She had gotten into a terrible car accident, and lost the ability to speak 5 foreign languages. It also caused a brain injury that affected her memory and made it hard to drive, work, or even text. So I mostly drove us around because of the covid shutdowns, or we met up with my friends in the park. N blended with our group seamlessly, and when she shared her troubles, everyone was sympathetic.

One day, one of my friends reached out to me in distress. N had asked her to repost one of her IG's, asking people to donate money for an expensive health treatment at a clinic. The post said she would die without getting this treatment. My friend was mostly worried but also felt uncomfortable. At that moment, something finally clicked for me.

I finally noticed the inconsistencies and it made my head spin. How did N drive down by herself in a brand new car, despite not having an income, not to mention a brain injury that prevented her from driving? She had on expensive new clothes and the iPhone that just came out. The one-bedroom apartment she rented in Beverly Hills cost $3,000 a month. And come to think of it, I've never known her to speak anything other than English. There were a dozen other things like that. That week, I texted her a few times and asked her for the name of the clinic. She side-stepped. On three separate occasions, I asked, but she would not reveal the name. I knew at that moment, I had no idea who I was dealing with. After an emotionally exhausting friendship, it was time to move on. To this day, I think back and wonder what was real.

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