hand over hand

chapter 8

HELLOOOOOO
sorry it took so long for me to write the new chapter but i hope you all liked it. You should definitely follow my Kawoshin account on Twitter. I don't really post anything lmao but I do retweet a lot of cute and amazing Kawoshin fanart, so you should check it out!!!!
The account is @natsushisan on twitter :)

Hey! I wanted to let you guys know that I wrote an extra chapter of the story about Rei and Kensuke's first kiss, I really wanted to write it but not in this story so you should check it out :)
https://archiveofourown.org/works/34919536

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The daylight and cold weather woke Kaworu up around ten in the morning. He covered himself with the big blankets and did the same for his friend who was still sleeping next to him. Throughout the night, they held hands and Shinji never stopped hugging Kaworu which he really appreciated because of the heat it gave him during the cold night. He could hear how there was no one outside their tents yet and how they were all probably still asleep, so he decided to go out to smoke a cigarette alone. He exited the tent after putting some pants on and walked over to the water that was colder than at night, lighting up the cigarette and enjoying the rays of sunlight that contacted with his skin, keeping him warm even in the cold air that there was. He smoked with a smile, remembering everything that happened the night before and he felt like a teenager again for feeling butterflies in his stomach whenever he thought about his first kiss with Shinji. But the happiness didn't last long since he was worried that things were going to change between them after the events of the night. He had to talk to Shinji about it, but maybe later, right now he just wanted to focus on the good things.

The cold air moved his fluffy hair so he took a seat in the sand, bringing his legs up to his chest so it would bring him some heat. The sun was already burning bright so that also helped a bit. The smoke from his cigarette was also warming his lungs and made him want to smoke another one but he fought the urge. He took out the box from his pants and decided to finally read all of the warnings that came in it. Damn, that's a lot of things that can happen to me... Even after finishing his cigarette, he continued reading and even considered throwing away the box that still contained about fifteen units in it, he dismissed the thought, he knew he would need more so why waste them? One step at a time, no need to rush.

Once he was too cold to stay where he was, he headed back to the tent, and as soon as he opened it he saw how Shinji hugged a pillow to replace his body, so he moved the pillow to get in Shinji's arms and closed his eyes, hoping he could get some more sleep. "Ugh, were you just smoking?" His voice sounded hoarse due to just waking up and Kaworu could hear his smile through his voice. He's smiling, that's a good sign, right?

Kaworu smiled and turned without breaking the hug. "Hi, how did you sleep?"

"Great thanks, what about you?" Shinji separated and rubbed his eyes to wake up properly.

Kaworu got closer to him, trying to get Shinji to hug him again. "I'm glad you did, I slept great too." Shinji did not hug him again, he stayed a little far from him as he nodded and started putting his pants on. "Oh, are you going out already?"

Shinji stopped putting his shoes on to look at Kaworu with a smile. "Yeah, I'm going to make some breakfast, I'll let you know when it's ready." Kaworu opened his mouth to say something else but decided to keep it to himself. "Why?"

Kaworu moved his head saying no. "No reason, I'll come out later, when breakfast is ready." Shinji smiled and nodded, getting out of the tent, and Kaworu laid down again thinking about what had just happened. He wasn't rude but he wasn't being nice either.

After everything that happened last night, he knew that it was a possibility for Shinji to become distant, maybe he could be embarrassed at the way he acted, the things he said, or by the fact that they made out really intense, which were all fair points and he had the right to take some time to process things and see what the hell is going on with both of them. However, Kaworu also had those doubts and he was also trying to figure things out, but he did remember how Shinji said last night wanted for them to go with it together. Maybe he got taken by the moment, maybe he just said what he knew I wanted to hear. He shook his head to stop thinking about those things, so he took his phone for it to take his attention, texting his family group chat to see how they were doing.