VLOG IT! (Until The Moment Comes) COMPLETED

Ikalimang Bahagi

******

" Am I pretending too much?," I asked after a couple of silence between us.

She holds my hand and caress it using her thumb before she look at the ocean.

"Pretending you're okay is sometimes okay. You know why? Pretending you're okay makes yourself stronger and that you don't want to give up that's why you're pretending to maybe cope up, but pretending is painful. I don't want to see you in pain, Stanley. I know you've been hurt and in pain for the past years because a lot happened, so I want to see smile. I want to see your real smiles and not the fake one so I can also remember your real smiles and not the fake one. "

I can't help but teared up. Lumingon siya sa akin at pinakitaan ako ng isang totoong ngiti na mula sa kaniyang puso.

She's right. It's so painful to pretend. You wanted so badly to cry, but you don't want others to see it, so you fake it with fake smiles. I hate to pretend. Ever since, I really hated to pretend and I'm true to myself, but as the river flows and things change, I resort into pretending.

"Thalia... Don't leave me okay? Huwag naman na pati ikaw, hmm?"

She smiled widely and wipe off my tears using her thumb.

"What a crybaby tsk. Of course! I'm not gonna leave you. I'm super strong kaya! Just trust me, Stanley my crybaby, hmm?," she said that made me laugh.

"It's been a long time since you call me 'Stanley  my crybaby' huh?"

"Why? Miss it? Hahaha."

Tumango ako. "Of course! You and Arise called me that way back."

She lay her head on my shoulder and intertwined our hands like we use to do when Arise's here.

"That accident... I'm sorry for blaming you. Hindi mo naman ginusto ang nangyari at walang gustong mangyari yun. I'm sorry..."

"It's fine. I understand. Kahit naman ako sinisisi ko pa rin ang sarili ko sa nangyari. I shouldn't have suggested that we should use the car."

Tumingala siya sa akin kaya napatingin ako sa kaniya. Mapait akong ngumiti sa kaniya bago ko iniwas ang tingin ko at ibinalik sa dagat.

******

We went to the seashore when sun is near to setting. Naglatag kami nang blanket malapit sa dagat and I help her assemble her camera. She said she wants to shoot her vlog here and have me as her guest but I declined. I'm not a fan of cameras.

"Oh C'mon, Stanley just this once okay? Dadami views nang mga videos ko kapag guest kita kasi gwapo ka kapag hindi ka pumayag, pangit kana, " she said like she just didn't try to sell me for her to have a million of views.

"You'll just have me as your guest because I'm handsome?," sabi ko na hindi makapaniwala.

"Bakit? May talent kaba diyan? Ipapakita din natin yun sa vlog gusto mo?"

I looked at her with amusement. Ganito naman na siya dati pa pero nakakagulat parin talaga. Minsan talaga makapal mukha ng babeng ito.

"Please? Just this once Stanley my handsome, genius, babe, and best friend hmm?," she said while she acts cute.

"Stop acting cute it's disgusting."

Napasimangot siya sa sinabi ko kaya natawa na lang ako. Gagawin niya talaga lahat makuha lang gusto niya kahit na magmukha siyang ewan. Tsk.

"Nothing change, Thalia. Fine. Just this once you said huh?"

Her face lighten up and she continously nodded as she looks so happy.