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Kiari.
I knocked on Nyairi door and she said come in
I walked in the room and seen she was under the covers reading a book
I looked at the tv seeing Lauryn Hill was playing. She got that from Satouri
"Yes"? she asked putting her book down
"You wanna stay with Satouri"? i asked
"You don't want me here"? she asked
"It's not about what i want it's about what you want"
"Yes, you don't want me here"
"I didn't say that"
"I'm not staying somewhere and i don't feel welcomed"
I been fucking up bad .. like bad bad
"It's not that i don't want you here—"
"I messed up your plans"? she asked
"All the things you wanted to do ? how you wanted to start a family with Satouri but then you remembered you got a daughter already"
"You really are a deadbeat, and it's crazy cause i thought you could only say that when they weren't in your life but you are you just don't .. idk you don't act like you want to be in my life"
"I do"
"Then why don't you act like it"?
"It's not like you have anything to be afraid of. I don't hate you, i love you and i feel like we could get along but you never talk to me"
"Satouri always be like you look like your dad and when i do things she always points out how you do it too. We could talk about these things and like bond over it but you seem like you don't want anything to do with me"
"I need you more than you think. And i still want you to be in my life even tho you messed up a lot i won't hold it against you cause everyone makes mistakes"
"I just don't want you to keep making them" she said wiping her face
"Imma do better , for you and Satouri i promise"
"Stop making promises cause you break all of them"
"I'm not breaking this promise. You and Satouri deserve better and imma be better. I didn't know you felt like this and it's my fault i know but imma fix it"
"So you can go with Satouri it's not like imma stop you. While y'all gone imma work on what i need to work on and shit"
"You forreal"? she asked sitting up and sitting next to me
"I'm deadass. And i'm sorry, frl" i said
"You stay breaking your promises though" she mumbled
"I know but i'm frl. I can't make you believe it by just saying it but you gone see"
"Okay" she said wiping her face
She got up and stood in front of me before wrapping her arms around me and hugging me
I can't fuck this up man
"I just want you to be in my life frl frl" she said pulling away
"Imma be in your life .. frl frl" i said making her laugh
"So .. are you and Satouri gonna make up"?
"Honestly .. i don't think we can save this relationship no more. She done frl"
