❝𝐅𝐎𝐎𝐋'𝐒 𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃❞ ɢʀᴇʏ·s ᴀɴᴀᴛᴏᴍʏ

CHAPTER TEN.

Maddox feels like one of those times when her mother would tell her not to touch something on the street, because it might be dirty or she might hurt herself with it. Or when she'd tell her not to run with her shoelaces untied, because she'd fall flat on her face and they'd have to stitch her face up again. Or when she told her not to climb over the garden railings because she would lose her balance and fall. Any of those occasions had one thing in common: the possibility of harm and pain was real, and yet Maddox had disobeyed.

"I told you not to touch that. You don't know what it is because it's not yours, and now you've hurt yourself. You won't do it anymore, will you?" Maria reprimands her.

Maddox quickly shakes her head, frightened. "No, mamá. I won't do it anymore. You can fix me, can't you?" The image of Maria Easton is evaporating, and instead of sitting at the kitchen counter at home, Maddox is standing in a hospital, operating room scrubs on, her gaze blank, an icy cold piercing her bones, and her hand buried in the chest of a dying patient. "Right, mamá?"

The return to reality is none too pleasant. Dylan, the bomb squad leader, circles around her to fit her as carefully as he can into the bomb vest. Maddox tries not to move, but her fingers inevitably pry around, and she finds that Hannah was right: something metallic is threatening to explode right in front of her, something hard and possibly bigger than she would want. Maddox takes a deep breath, aware that this is a situation where she has to give it her all, stay calm and not do anything stupid. Stupider than sticking her hand in a patient's bleeding wound with a bomb in it, of course.

Next to her, Cristina, also wearing the vest, says nothing. Maddox thinks an obscene number of times about Meredith's premonition from earlier that morning, but dares not externalize it for fear that Cristina will feel guilty for telling her that, or that Cristina will think she's going crazy. Still, the other surgeon remains silent, feeling unable to say anything to improve the tense atmosphere they are in.

Maddox is almost grateful that Burke is back in the operating room. From the look on his face he doesn't bring good news, so Maddox simply turns her gaze back to nothing to avoid unpleasantness.

"It's time for you to go," he whispers to Cristina.

"No, I'm staying," Cristina tries to make those her last words, to let Burke sense the steadiness in her voice, but her trembling fingers betray her on the manual respirator.

"There's nothing more you can do here. We got it covered. Cristina, this is not another cool surgery. This ammo could go off anytime and kill everyone in this room, do you get that? You cannot be in here."

Cristina opens her mouth to refute something, but Burke comes up to her ear and mumbles so softly that even Maddox, inches away from them, can't hear what it's all about. The brunette looks away, as if for a moment of intimacy, and only looks back at Cristina when she reaches for her again.

"We'll be fine," Maddox speaks in a light tone, trying to defuse the tension. "It's okay," is enough for Cristina to nod slowly, still debating between wanting to accompany her friend and wanting to get Burke to be able to operate properly. "Cristina," she calls to her before she disappears out the door. "If Mer hears about this, you tell her next time it'll be me who stays in bed. Yeah?" Her smile is weak but there, and Cristina nods again, leaving the room.

Time passes, and Maddox doesn't see that a real solution is on the way. It is Dylan who momentarily relieves Cristina in getting Mr. Carlson to breathe, and the fact that the man is there and not at an urgent meeting to get that bomb out does not reassure her, although he does come out later, and that doesn't calm her much either. Burke sits in front of her, as expectant as Maddox or even more so. Maddox is aware that Burke is the OR chief, and also her resident that day, so anything Maddox does wrong will fall on his responsibility. Even if that bomb explodes in her hand and she dies.