Yudhisthir was sitting at the balcony of his chamber looking vaguely at the full grown moon.
A sigh escaped from his lips as tears rolled down from his eyes.
"How can I say such words to Mata? How could I! She, the one who had sacrificed her while life just for us, how can I say cursing words to her? I am such an unworthy son, neither I became a good son to my mother nor a good father to save my children and even failed as a king. What's the meaning of my life? I lost everywhere" he said with a blank face.
Again he was feeling a void inside him, a void that was eating up his existence, he could feel a heart breaking sorrow slowly slowly as if breaking the bones of his heart cage. It was such unbearable that he stayed pinned to his seat, neither he could breathe nor he could gulp the sorrow down to his throat.
Drops of sweat beads gathered over his forehead, he clutched the soft cover of the seat. He could feel his finger and toe tips are getting strangely cold against his will. What was it? He didn't know but it was clearly unbearable more than painful.
Suddenly his heart jumped high as he felt a hand over his shoulder.
He looked back and saw Draupadi standing.
Flashback
Draupadi was lying on her chamber lifelessly, her children died, how she would live now without the biggest support? The children who were part of her own blood whom she carried in her womb bearing 9 months of pain, left her. How the pain supposed to her?
She was not in sense of understanding someone else's pain right that time, she needed time, the wound of losing her own blood was still deep, she needed time to recover to her conscious self.
When she was drowning in her own ocean of grief, her maid informed her that Rajmata Kunti wanted to meet her.
Wiping her tears, she proceeded towards the seating room where Kunti was seating, eyes filled with tears.
"Pranipat Mata" she greeted Kunti.
"Kalyaanamastu Putri" Kunti said.
Draupadi smiled, dryly.
Who's Kalyan? Her? She was nothing but a beggar now, who had all earthly wealth but the her heart was all empty.
Kunti could sense the humorless feeling.
"Draupadi, I want a help putri"
"Say Mata, how can I help" Draupadi said with a sigh.
"Please putri go to him, he need someone! I...I know you are in extreme grief and I am such a unfortunate instead of giving you solace I am asking you to provide solace to him" Kunti suddenly broke down in crying.
"I did very bad with my first born, I would have stop him I would have did but I didn't, again I can't lose my second son in same way, you know him what he is, how suppressive, I fear if he continue with his all emotion buried within himself someday he..." Kunti could not finished her lines. Draupadi closed her eyes.
"Save him, he need to drain out his emotions, I.. I tried to talk but he suppressed , he won't even express himself infront of his brothers, he always tried to make others happy by taking all over himself, now only you or Devi can talk, your mental state is not good so Devi could have talk but Devi isn't here, please Draupadi please, save him" Kunti cried.
Draupadi could not see her in such state though the weight on her heart was heavy she could not bear another now, but she could not even lose any one now, it was too much for her. So she decided to do as Kunti wished, who know she could find some solace also with talking.
Flashback ends
"Arya.. why are you sitting in cold like this?" She asked slowly.
"Why you came here Draupadi, you are too stressed for anything, go take rest" he said and turned again.
The sweatbeads didn't go unnoticed by her.
"How are you sweating in winter, Arya you seems unwell" she said sitting next to him. Yudhisthir felt her soft hand wiped his forehead as a unwanted sigh left his mouth.
His temple was extremely cold so as his body, her warm touch made shivers ran through his spine.
"Arya, come inside"
He remained stiff at his place as if he didn't hear. Draupadi sighed.
Cupping his cheek she made him look at her she shivered a bit looking at his golden face lost it's colour, the wit and calmness in his eyes as if hid behind the current vagueness.
She could felt the words of Kunti were so true, Yudhisthir was losing his usual self, what he was without his self? Absolutely nothing, no he couldn't lose now, he was born to be the emperor of Aryavart, nothing could happen to him before his life purpose get fulfilled.
Yudhisthir on other side could feel the ice melting down of his heart. No, no, he couldn't break, he caused so much harm in everyone's life, he didn't want to be burden again in an injured soul like Draupadi or anyone.
"Come Arya, come inside" she pulled his hand.
"Please Draupadi go please, save yourself from my unintentional harmful nature, I never wanted but ended up giving incurable wounds, I don't want another incurable wound, please go"
"Won't you listen to me? Please Arya, I am requesting come inside"
Her words, the request felt like arrow in his heart, he caused only harm to her and still she was requesting his good, he was saying that he won't cause anyone's grief but not paying attention to her words, he was doing the same harm.
Sighing he got up from his place, the previous uneasiness faded long ago when Draupadi came.
Leading him towards his bed she made him lie down and pulled quilt over him. He was still gazing at ceiling.
Draupadi lied beside him and pulled the quilt over both of them. Pressing her arms around him she placed her head in crook of his neck.
Though he was telling himself that he would distant himself for good but feeling her beside him his one part of soul wanted to scream and cry but he was holding himself back. He was lying stiffly.
Draupadi felt this, she felt he wasn't responding to her. Why? But she didn't give up. She continued to lie like this, pressing her warm body against his cold, extreme cold body to reduce the coldness.
